It’s almost that time of the year! Oktoberfest! One of the biggest parties in the world! FUN TIMES SEHR GÜT! As a remote homage to this international beer holiday, we brewed up an unfiltered (we don’t own a filter) and unfined (no clarifiers added) rendition of this style with pilsner, vienna, and caramunich malts from Weyermann and German Mittelfruh hops. And while we’re still trying to find our way back to the good old days of partying our faces off, surrounded by friends and randos alike, we’ll let this beer attend the party in proxy for now.
nelsonnugz.com
Pale Ale|5.0%|52 IBU
Through the collaborative spirit of the digital realm, we decided to upload our newest version of this hoppy crusher in the progressive tech hub of Seattle. Pale Ales are as tried and true as floppy disks, MS-DOS, VHS tapes and MP3 players. They never go out of style - even if they go out of relevancy. A blend of 2-Row and White Wheat prop up the hard drive, while the Nelson Sauvin, Nugget, & Hop 630 use up all the memory. Have a Beer. Surf the Web. Taste the Technology.
Verse Jump IPA
IPA|6.9%|57 IBU
It’s that time of the year where we approach peak FOMO - all the concerts, beach parties, hikes to alpine lakes, backyard BBQs, friends with boats, M’s games, road trips - ALL THE THINGS! And it’s impossible to do it all at once - UNLESS - you channel yourself in multiple metaverses, and verse jump simultaneously through active portals with the help of your own self that lives in the Alphaverse. How do you FIND you? All you need are some old walkman headphones and this IPA, loaded with HBC 586, Mosaic, and a splash of Citra. Also, you might want to eat some mushrooms too, but you didn’t hear that from us. HAPPY SUMMER FUN TIMES!
Jump To Conclusions IPA
IPA|6.7%|59 IBU
Oh hey LOOK at this beer! It’s ExTrA HaZy that’s CrAzY! That’s because there’s oats in the malt bill! Spelt too! Therefore it should be soft and fluffy and sweet and cloying. BUTITSNOT. Those oats do a nice job of balancing the bright citrus flavors from mostly from Amarillo (in a hazy?! Whaaa!) along with some solid bitterness and a surprisingly dry finish. In short - hazy is not a flavor, looks can be deceiving, and assessing a beer on its appearance is much less important than for its aroma, flavor, and finish. Now go on, enjoy everything about this beer.
Happy Little Clouds
Contemporary American-Style Pilsner|5.3%|32 IBU
2021 GABF Silver & 2022 World Beer Cup BronzeWe believe everyday is a good day when you brew. Start out, by believing here. A little touch of pilsner malt here, a little push of German and American hops there, caressed very gently layer after layer after layer. There are no limits here. Weyermann Pilsner Malt & an ever changing blend of hops.
Batch #1024 “Breaking Bob” Brewer Notes: This batch features a new American trifecta - Mosaic, Strata, & Citra - on top of our standard GR Magnum, CZ Saaz, GR Mandarina varieties. It has a combo of tropical & citrus notes, along with a little earthy spice, perfect for an RV ride through the New Mexican desert.
Batch #1014 “What If Bob Was One Of Us” Brewer Notes: This batch features Oregon grown Santiam hops, on top of our standard GR Magnum, CZ Saaz, GR Mandarina varieties. It has notes of lemon zest, fresh flowers, beach grass, and nobody calling on the phone.
Batch #992 “Bob Bless You” Brewer Notes: This batch features Ahtanum hops along with a splash of Citra, on top of our standard GR Magnum, CZ Saaz, GR Mandarina varieties. What do we taste? Great Question! We get notes of orange marmalade, lemongrass, & jasmine.
Batch #971 “Most Beautiful Bob” Brewer Notes: This batch features German Callista hops, on top of our standard GR Magnum, CZ Saaz, GR Mandarina varieties! The word Callista is derived from Greek, meaning “most beautiful,” and after tasting this version, that checks out. We get notes of white peach, apricot, green tea, & lemongrass.
Batch #943 “Legalize Bob” Brewer Notes: Bob, are you high? Simcoe in a pilsner?! Plus a little Citra & Mosaic Cryos?! On top of the standard GR Magnum, CZ Saaz, GR Mandarina! This is the most resinous version yet - notes of grapefruit peel, meyer lemon, pineapple husk & purple kush.
Batch #921 “Beach Bob” Brewer Notes: It’s that time of the year again when we need a beach vacation STAT. This batch is hopped with GR Magnum, CZ Saaz, GR Mandarina, & Australian Ella hops - and with notes of white peach, rose, green tea, and lemongrass, you can at least think about traveling to Australia.
Batch #912 “In Bob We Trust” Brewer Notes: Bob’s been getting a lot of love lately - a Silver at GABF, a Gold at Washington Beer Awards - and it means the world to us that it’s finally getting noticed. But also, we’ve felt it was special all along. So, this batch is hopped with GR Magnum, CZ Saaz, GR Mandarina, & Oregon Amarillo - a little more of a classic rendition - with notes of orange peel, lemon zest, and meadow grass.
Batch #903 “Wet Hop Bob (Citra)” Brewer Notes: This is the first time we’ve implemented wet hops in HLC! We used 5#/bbl of Citra from CLS Farms, which gives this version notes of meyer lemon, yellow peaches, & tangerine with a slightly grassy/chewy depth.
Batch #877 “Basic Bob” Brewer Notes: This version swings back towards the equilibrium where European noble hops meet a new American “noble” variety (CZ Saaz, German Mandarina, & US Loral Cryo) for lemon peel, alpine wildflowers, and a touch of peppery spice.
Batch #851 “Post Modern Robert” Brewer Notes: This version is so bastardized it’s fully jumped over to Contemporary American Pils territory. Late hop additions with CZ Saaz (normal), Mosaic (umm), & Strata (insanity) give this version notes of meyer lemon, pineapple, tangerine & guava.
Batch #814 “Grunge Bob Square Pants” Specific Brewer Notes: Late hop additions with CZ Saaz, German Mandarina, & German Grüngeist give this version a pleasant, stonefruity sauv blanc-ish lilt that will have you binge watching Sponge Bob Square Pants because there is nothing left to watch.
Batch #784 “Send It Bobby” Specific Brewer Notes: Late hop additions with CZ Saaz, German Mandarina, & Amarillo give this version a bright, refreshing, citrus-pithy depth that will quench your thirst after you SEND IT JERRY all day at the mountain.
Batch #742 “New Zealand Bob” Specific Brewer Notes: With an all New Zealand sourced dry-hop, brush strokes of tropical, floral, citrusy & spicy notes paint a beautifully well-rounded picture.
Batch #704 “Yakima Bob” Specific Brewer Notes: The most fruit forward version we’ve ever made - tangerine, meyer lemon & lime peel at the forefront with noble, spicy undertones.
Reports Of My Death Have Been Greatly Exaggerated
West Coast IPA|7.2%|68 IBU
Have you heard the word? West Coast IPAs are coming back baby, in all their clear and bitter glory. Can you believe they almost went extinct, near death by irrelevance, no thanks to that juicy haze craze cooler maze. PHEW! It’s like Sierra Nevada and Lagunitas must’ve been shaking in their boots the last 5 years, as everybody forgot about them and their millions of barrels! Oh the pendulum of time, the shifting of palate preference, and the perception of trends. Alas, let us rejoice in this new found love of yesteryear - loaded with Warrior, Mosaic, Citra, Chinook - as this style rises from the ashes of adjuncts. And remember, we have told you nothing about IPA that is not true.
Stratabulous! IPA
IPA|6.7%|63 IBU
From the brewers that NEVER...er, RARELY...brew single hop beers...other than Snoozefest, and Mosaicin’ Me Crazy...yes, we made each of those a few times...ANYWAYS...we proudly offer our newest and nextest iteration: STRATABULOUS! In this rendition, we used 7 unique lots of Strata, spanning 2 harvests (2020 + 2021) from four farms (Crosby, Goschie, Roy & Coleman) to give you depth and complexity like you’ve never tasted before. There are notes of Guava! Passionfruit! Ruby Red Grapefruit! And Tangerines! So don’t be fooled by the horrible name of this beer - it’s magical. It’s mesmerizing. It’s fantastic. It’s fabulous.
Cool Space Photos IPA
IPA|6.7%|57 IBU
Hey. Did you see those crazy photos from that new NASA space telescope? Well we did too. It’s the largest AND most powerful space telescope on the earth…but not necessarily in existence, because technically some other world could have one in a different galaxy and be like looking back at us, and like even more in depth, and see us making news about our $10 billion dollar telescope and be all laughing like “HAHAHA” or maybe like “Glurgh Zok Zok Zok” (bc that’s how those specific beings laugh) and are all like “those humans can only barely see things 13.1 billions years old, what a bunch of plebes!” But at least those cool space photos distracted us from all the other shit going on, and allowed us to think about how small we are in comparison to so many things, and that there is so much out there that we don’t even know. But one thing we do know is, if you brew a beer with Galaxy hops, craft beer law states the name MUST reference space. So there’s that. There’s also Simcoe & Citra in there too, to create maximum intergalactic enjoyment. “CHONK!” (that means “cheers”)
Froth Goblin
Helles Lager|5.0%|30 IBU
Crush that fresh nectar, that rocky white foam, that sweet bready malt, that alpine meadow Mittelfruh, that prickly carb, that clean crisp quench. That glug, that charge, that gulp, that burp. Froth Goblin is built for speed, engineered for maximum stoke, adhered to highest of German standards, designed for the lowest of introspection. Dig it, clink it, drink it, foam stache it, again and again, til you become one with the goblin of the froth. No idea what we’re talking about? Have another. You’ll see.
Reverse Course IPA
IPA|6.7%|60 IBU
Watch out! Inconveniently coming through! We’re moving backwards, ‘cause that’s the hot new (?) thing in this country. From body autonomy to public safety, from the environment to the classroom, from voting rights to human rights, and the blurred line of church and state - IT’S ALL GOING IN REVERSE. And since this is our current world, we figured we’d jump on that backwards moving bandwagon and use some hops that were cool when Reagan was trickling down money and we had an ineffective war on drugs and Clarence Thomas was, uh, still sexually harassing women. These are hops that you didn’t necessarily ask for, but that doesn’t matter because we want to use them. They are classic, they are American, and their acreage (& relevance) is dwindling. OK, which hops?! CRYSTAL! NUGGET! CHINOOK! And…ok fine we’ll compromise, some CITRA is in there too. DON’T SAY WE NEVER DID ANYTHING FOR YOU. Doesn’t it taste great? Like the good old days? You know, like simpler times when everything was just swell? No? Those times never existed?
Conditional Hours
Pale Ale|6.1%|40 IBU
Beer names are cool huh? We can name things silly, serious, stylistic, stimulating, nonsensical, after a song or a poem or a book or a movie or an essay, the world is our proverbial oyster, whatever that means. This time, we chose a name that is informative. It’s essentially a PSA, reminding everybody that our Western Avenue location has conditional hours of operation.
Western is open for business every day. HOWEVER, Monday through Thursday we are To-Go ONLY from 12-6pm. That means you cannot drink beer inside our tasting room on those days. BUT, you can do that on Friday starting at 4pm til 10pm, on Saturday from Noon - 10pm, and on Sunday from Noon - 8pm.
We know it’s annoying. But our tasting room is in our load zone. And since we are a brewery that had to wholly change our business model in 2020 for survival, we are now using the tasting room 5 days a week for our production needs.
And we get it, people serendipitously swing by everyday - mostly shocked, surprised, disappointed, annoyed - to find this information out. Which is why all this information is on our website here and here, our ig profile here, and even on google over here. That said, both @googlebusiness and #fuckyelp don’t allow us to specify these conditional hours in our public listings so they don’t really help us that much. THAT SAID, our location at 5456 Shilshole Ave in Ballard (a mere 4.9 miles away) is open every day of the week to happily serve you fresh pints in an open/covered/heated space. We even have a food truck there that serves some of the best dumplings & noodles in town, while we’re on the subject.
Ok ok this is a lot of words, none of which are about this delicious pale ale with Oregon grown Meridian hops and Yakima grown Citra, bursting with notes of blackberries and tangerines. Some beers serve as vehicles of hops and some for change, and some to just to remind you what our conditional hours are at Western Ave. If you are still reading this description, bless your heart. You deserve a beer!
Too Late IPA
IPA|6.8%|55 IBU
…but it was TOO LATE. Steve was so excited about the Citra Vista IPA he had brewed a mere 2 days ago, that he inadvertently dry-hopped the tank with the next week’s varieties. Citra and Vista had joined the Mosaic and Nelson party. And after some loudly exclaimed expletives, and a deep breath, he realized that this combination has potential to actually taste pretty great. And so, we decided to make things interesting by doing the inverse recipe from the week before for this beer. Which ended up being a fun experiment as far as flavor and aroma impact go in regards to hop addition sequences! And yeah, the malt bills are different, but sometimes hops happen and you just have to roll with it. Please enjoy this inadvertent yet delicious beer, and compare it to Wait Wait IPA to discover the nuance.
Hot Side (Kettle/Whirlpool): Citra & Vista
Cold Side (Dry Hop): Mosaic & Nelson
Notes of: pineapple, passionfruit, lime
So Last Summer
English Summer Ale|5.4%|27 IBU
2021: Cottagecore
2020: N95s
2019: Birkenstocks
2017: Citra Cryo Hops
2010: Michael Cera
2004: Puka shells
2001: This beer style.
1999: Birkenstocks again
1998: Motueka Hops
1982: The Go-Gos
1970: Hippie Shit
1966: Maris Otter Malt
1910: Bathing Costumes
1839: East Kent Golding Hops
Wait Wait IPA
IPA|6.9%|58 IBU
As most of you - our customers, our drinkers, our fans - have come to know, our IPA recipes are created with explicit intent (even if the names and descriptions might not make it seem that way). We start with a blank slate: build the malt bill, perseverate over the hop bill, go back to the malt bill to see if we should tweak it now that we have an idea of what hops we’re using, then finally go back over the hops and dry-hop. Oftentimes, we ask questions like: Are we building this beer around a specific hop variety? Is it the relationship between two hop varieties? Is it a combination of 2, 3, 4 maybe 5 hop varieties to express a desired flavor and aroma profile? Or is this a new combination so we can discover what that outcome might be? Why are we telling you all of this? Well, because this beer started out to see what two lots of Mosaic hops would do with one specific lot of Nelson Sauvin hops. But, nearing the end of a long day, 8 days after we brewed this beer, Steve carefully weighed out the hops for the dry hop addition, climbed up the ladder, and as soon as he finished adding 88# total pounds of Vista and Citra hops, an inner voice exclaimed “WAIT! WAIT!”...
Hot Side (Kettle/Whirlpool): Mosaic & Nelson
Cold Side (Dry Hop): Citra & Vista
Notes of: nectarine, lychee, white grapefruit, meyer lemon
Memory of a Memory IPA
IPA|7.0%|68 IBU
If you were to think about IPAs brewed in the PNW in the early 2000s, what comes to mind? For us, they were assertive, rough around the edges, with a crystal malt presence that sometimes came off sweet and/or muddled, high perceived bitterness, unfiltered sheen of haze, with aromatic notes of grapefruit and pine trees and sharp esters. And while we look back fondly on these formative beers, if we were to replicate one, to the “T”, in this day and age, it probably wouldn’t be all that great. Those are not fighting words - we’re just being honest! And it won’t stop us from re-imaging what they could’ve been, with what we know now, twenty years later, and making one with all the things we looked back fondly on, while editing away some of those less desirable components. We hope this beer tastes familiar to you, but also, like it was brewed in the year 2022.
Rahr 2 Row, Simpsons T-50, Carafoam, Acidulated.
Chinook, Centennial, Cascade, Simcoe
Millions Of Beaches IPA
IPA|6.8%|54 IBU
Whenever we use Talus hops, we can’t help but think of the beach. It’s SO. FUCKING. TROPICAL - like passionfruit, mango, key lime, pineapple, & coconut - and thus, we want to drink beers made with it by the beach, around the beach, while at the beach, looking at the beach, thinking of the beach, and the like. For this sandy little trip, we added some peachy Citra hops for depth and some ADHA 218 hops for maximum tropicalia. Seattle hasn’t seen much beach weather yet…but fingers crossed that changes soon. Until then, you can shove your nose in this beer, take a long sip, close your eyes, dream of summer vibes, until you get rudely interrupted and be all like BEACH, PLEASE!
Porter
Porter|5.8%|40 IBU
That’s it. This is the name of the beer. It’s also the style of this beer. In almost 7 years of brewing beer, we’ve never named a beer by its style. That would be so boring! And uninspiring! And old school! It’s too simple! But here we are. And that’s basically this beer. It is what it is - a straightforward, chocolatey, slightly roasty, hint of caramel, touch of earthy hops, with a blanched finish. PORTER. You either want it, or you don’t.
Rock The Boat
Hazy Pale Ale|6.2%|40 IBU
A few times in our lives, we’ve been told to not “rock the boat.” It’s kinda similar to telling someone to “calm down,” as it often garners a response that has the opposite of the desired effect. And if ever there was a time to rock the boat…that time is NOW. Because among other things, we live in a country that: continuously cuts healthcare funding and is the only developed nation that refuses to offer universal healthcare; aims to strip the rights of body autonomy and LGBTQIA+ equality; gerrymanders and limits access to voting in free and fair elections; continues to insert Christianity into public policy and education; ignores a looming climate crisis while giving in to big industry and corporate greed; and refuses to pass reasonable, common sense gun control measures when more Americans have died domestically from firearms than from ALL WARS COMBINED¹; among MANY other issues….so…ok… FUCK THIS SHIT. Go on now, ROCK. THAT. BOAT. And if you get thirsty while you’re doing it, here is a pleasant, juicy pale ale hopped with Strata and Citra upon a soft grist of 2- Row, Pils, Red Wheat, & Spelt.
Every hop deserves a second chance. Most, maybe even a third. And that’s where Ekuanot comes in. Wait WAIT. DON’T YOU DARE STOP READING. We first had taste of Ekuanot as Hop #366 in 2013, before it was released to the public with the name Equinox….which then had to be changed with trademark reasons…so yeah, it wasn't the smoothest roll out for a new hop variety. Anyways, the hop previously known as Equinox was promising! At times, at least! But then people started to make single hop IPAs with it and it would go all green bell pepper, and the farmers were still tweaking picking windows, and quite a few brewer’s wrote this hop off. Acreage went from 890 planted acres in 2017 all the way down to 381 acres in 2021. But guess what? THIS SHIT IS FIRE NOW. STOP LAUGHING. Seriously, try this beer and tell us it doesn’t deserve a seat at the IPA table. And yes, the recipe is cut with Citra - but the overall math is 30% Ekuanot T-90s, 30% Ekuanot Cryo, & 40% Citra T-90s, resulting in flavors of white pineapple, tangerine, dark cherry and a hint of red peppercorn. So yeah…EkuaNOT? More Like EkuaYEAH!
Knock Knock IPA
IPA|6.6%|63 IBU
Belma. Belma Who? Idaho 7. What? Citra. Citra? Are you just saying the hop bill? That’s not how this works. Orange. I know this one, it's like ‘Orange you glad you didn’t say banana’. We didn’t say Banana! More like Strawberries and Pineapple. This is the worst knock knock joke of all time. Knock Knock. Ok this is also the worst beer description of all time. Delicious Beer!
Frozen Assets
Frozen Wet Hop IPA|6.7%|50 IBU
We know, you know - Frozen Assets can be a big deal. And a big pain in the butt. And oftentimes - BAD NEWS. But fret not - you WANT these frozen assets. These ice cold bullets. These sub zero heroes. These arctic flavor darts. These things are so rare, you gotta call Yakima Chief to unlock them and ask for them to be released into the wild. This time we went with 22#/bbl of equal parts Citra, Mosaic, & Azacca for a fresh blast of pineapple, tangerine, and papaya. It’s leafy, it’s juicy, it’s fleeting, it’s fading - so get it before you get iced out like an ice age. On that note, this is our last fresh hop beer, frozen or otherwise, until September - so get it and CHILL.
Flashing Lights IPA
IPA|6.9%|57 IBU
One thousand turns under the sun. That’s a pretty big deal! And to commemorate it, instead of brewing something new and/or big and/or CRAZY, we chose to look back at the first IPA we ever made, in November of 2015. IPAs have changed quite a bit over the last 6+ years, but this beer still holds its own - a juicy, tropical and bright West Coast Hazy rendition that’s bittered with Chinook, and finished with copious amounts of Citra, Mosaic, & Cascade. And after near-countless IPAs we’ve made since, it feels pretty special to look back and re-brew the one that opened us up and introduced you all to our little brewery that could. We couldn’t make IPAs if nobody drank them….so here’s to YOU! And another 1,000 more!
Pretty Flowers IPA
IPA|7.2%|65 IBU
This time of year just hits differently, and we’ve decided it’s because of….pretty flowers. Yes, they hit you right in the nasal glands. Also kinda dry your mouth out. And they get you in the back of the throat as well. But they sure do look beautiful! And guess what…THIS BEER PRETTY MUCH CHECKS ALL THOSE BOXES AS WELL! It’s a west coasty soiree of Warrior, Citra, Amarillo, Chinook, and Cascade Cryo that’ll consume your senses with tangerine, meyer lemon, pineapple husk, along with some balanced yet assertive bitterness. You’ll be like “Oh WOW! I remember how pretty West Coast IPAs are! Yum! Aggressive! Bitter! OK I’ve had enough now!” and then it will be gone for the year and you’ll look back fondly upon it, until it blooms once again…probably before Spring?…we don’t know…we only schedule brews out a few weeks in advance, so seriously, no idea…OH LOOK! TULIPS!
Mosaicin’ Me Crazy IPA
IPA|6.9%|60 IBU
From the brewers that refuse to do single hop beers... but still previously brought you Snoozefest (& brought it back)….comes this IPA only brewed with….MOSAIC….AGAIN. Wait WAIT, don’t leave! Let us explain. On the surface level, it sure looks like a “single” hop IPA. BUTITSNOT. We used 7 uniquely different lots of Mosaic, from 4 different harvest years (2018, 2019, 2020, & 2021), from 5+ different farms that we know of (because some lots are blended), in 3 different forms - T90 pellet, Cryo Pellet, and Cryo Powder. Ok, still with us? So by using this many different types of Mosaic, it allowed us to create more depth and gave us more control of the outcome than your typical boring ass single hop beer. The end result is the most robust and all encompassing Mosaic hop profile we could ever dream of. Got it? Get it. Good.
Fun Differential
DIPA|8.1%|70 IBU
Inspired by M’s coach Scott Servais, we poured over recent metrics and statistics regarding the successful outcomes of certain double IPAs. Coach is right - often, an overlooked stat is called Fun Differential - which relates to how much more fun the drinker has while enjoying one of our DIPAs compared to DIPAs from other breweries. After a few observations and correlative calculations, we called up Galaxy, Strata, Citra and Azacca Cryo from the cooler and inserted them in the starting line-up. As a result, we predict our fun differential to be maximal, optimal, and optimaximal- largely in part to the notes of ripe tangerine, papayas, mangos and corresponding higher percentage of alcohol by volume. And as we all know, beers that end the season with higher fun differential percentages tend to have higher win rates. And EVERYBODY likes winning. So go, get out there and play some beer!
Abort the Court IPA
IPA|6.5%|60 IBU
Way back when, in 2017, we brewed a beer called Rhythm Method, which raised funds for our regional Planned Parenthood branch. The name and description was cute. This one, less so. Five years later, the Supreme Court - a group that currently includes a couple of judges credibly accused of sexual assault and harassment - is about to strip the right of body autonomy away from women. They are trying to erase a ruling put in place to protect the health, safety, and privacy of a woman’s body. Abortion is healthcare, and any reason to get one is, and should continue to be, none of your fucking business. Proponents will say it’s about protecting “life” - but if that’s true, then why is there so little attention and resources put towards universal healthcare, childcare, parental care & leave, and early education? On that note, maybe a court decision banning easy access to assault rifles that can take away the life of this post-fetus in mere seconds should, by this line of reasoning, also be coming any day now, no? Anyways - we’re rambling here because we are fucking mad. 100% of the profits from this beer will be split between the Northwest Abortion Access Fund (nwaafund.org) and Planned Parenthood Great Northwest (plannedparenthood.org). This beer is our small way of helping women in our backyard along with women in more restrictive states (we’re looking at you, Idaho) get safe abortions. Get fucked, SCOTUS. ~~~Citra, El Dorado, Loral, & Vic Secret
Shushhh!!!
Frozen Fresh Hop IPA|6.7%|50 IBU
This ain’t no ordinary frozen fresh hop brew, ok? Which, by the way, isn’t ordinary to begin with! FROZEN FRESH HOPS ARE AMAZING! That said, THIS particular product used an even more experimental process involving whole cone frozen fresh hops that we had to sign an NDA for. AN NDA! That’s shorthand for Non Disclosure Agreement, aka don’t tell ANYBODY about this thing. We even blindfolded our other brewer Patrick, and he had to add these secret things to BOILING WORT sight unseen! Or else, we’d be in trouble. Like super duper trouble if anybody found out that this crazy new thing is called YCH 301 Trial Simcoe that are essentially FROZEN FRESH WHOLE CONES TURNED INTO CRYO PELLETS. Oh. Ummm. UH OH. FUCK. Forget you just read that, ok? And, uh, if you don’t hear from us in a while, please search behind the SE side of the Yakima Chief Warehouse* in Sunnyside, WA. *Yakima Chief gave us permission to spill the beans earlier this week so we are all good…we hope…most likely…probably.
Not My Problem IPA
IPA|6.7%|63 IBU
Historically poor grain harvest? Smoke tainted hops? Low snowpack affecting irrigation? Unpredictable heat domes and cold spells? WE’RE NOT FARMERS!Less tree pulp for cardboard? Hard to find plastic resins and recyclable content? Aluminum cans & glass bottle shortage? WE’RE NOT A FACTORY FOR CHRISTSAKE!Gas prices going up? Like Gasoline but also CO2? NOT AN OIL BARON SO WHAT!Rent increasing every year? Health insurance and business insurance premiums going up? Property Taxes Going Up? Personal Property Taxes Going Up? Cost of living going up? YOUR BILLS AND NOT OURS!CAN I HAVE A TASTER TRAY WHILE YOU FILL MY GROWLER? NO?!HEY! WHY’S THIS BEER COST 50 CENTS MORE!!~~~Warrior, Amarillo, Strata, Citra, Cascade Cryo
Performance Review
Extra Pale Ale|5.8%|48 IBU
This is another pale that we brewed with a new hop variety, but this one is extra special. First, because NOBODY in the entire world has ever brewed with this hop before. How do we know this? Well, we’re part of the trade group that CREATED IT. It was bred, trialed, planted, harvested and processed at OSU as part of some experimental lines funded by the Hop Quality Group. And this year’s harvest yielded us….34 pounds of pellets. Total. And we got it all. So there’s that. What’s the Hop Quality Group? The Hop Quality Group was established in 2010 by a group of 9 breweries you’ve probably heard of - Russian River, Sierra Nevada, Stone, Bell’s, New Belgium, Firestone Walker, Odells, New Glarus, & Sam Adams - and has grown to a group of 50+ breweries, including yours truly. We tour hop farms, facilities and pellet mills; establish best practice guidelines for quality and safety; and fund a breeding program that someday will produce new, publicly available hops varieties…maybe like this one, currently named HQ2015031-002, which has notes of Blueberry, White Peach, & Lemon Balm.
Soft Shock IPA
IPA|6.7%|50 IBU
It’s been ages since we took a deep dive listening to a whole lotta old Yeah Yeah Yeahs albums, so we decided to dust off this old recipe (from 2016!?) for Karen O (side Q: Is Karen O is the least “Karen” human with this name? We think yes.) This base of 2 Row, Oats, Wheat, Spelt and Rye - combined with less bittering - sets this recipe up with a soft & smooth body. A medley of Citra, Amarillo, Mosaic, El Dorado, & Melon hops yelp in harmony to give you a tropical fruit salad of hop flavors & aroma - pineapple, honeydew, mango, tangerine, & kiwi. Yes, kiwi. It’s in there. All in all, this song is a sharp shock, to your soft side, summer moon, catch your shut eyes, in our (tasting) room. And other people’s rooms (bars) around town.
Keller Whalez
Unfiltered German Pilsner w/ Spelt|5.4%|40 IBU
This ain't your neck-bearded older brother's type of whale. But this unfiltered & unfined rustic AF German Pilsner, with a splash of Spelt and hopped with Magnum, Mittelfruh, Tettnang, & Saaz, has never been brewed before and nor will it ever be brewed again. You know what that means? ISOs for days. Secondary prices your I-banking roommate balks at. And people trying to sneak some of it outta the fest in their crinkled Aquafina bottles. Or none of that, because it's a pale lager.
Training Bines IPA
IPA|7.0%|45 IBU
Heyo! It’s another round of making our friend’s beer, and this recipe comes from Pinthouse Brewing out of Austin, Texas. The Pinthouse crew is known for making some of the best IPAs in the country, garnering multiple GABF and World Beer Cup medals in those categories. This specific beer is all about highlighting their selected lots of Simcoe, Citra, & Mosaic, along with a splash of Motueka over a super drinkable base of 2 Row, Pils, & a splash of color. It’s also pretty low in bitterness (compared to our usual IPAs), allowing the fruit flavors of tangerine, peach, key lime and watermelon to shine through. If you’re interested in trying more versions of this recipe, Highland Park (LA), Cellarmaker (SF), Green Cheek (Anaheim), and Alvarado Street (Monterrey) will also be releasing versions in the coming days. Cheers to friends!
How To Get Rich
DIPA|7.7%|60 IBU
We want to tell you about a dream. We found ourselves talking with John Wilson, when a Hummer limousine drove by. When you’re rich, you have a lot of money - so much so you get driven around in a Hummer limousine like it’s any old normal thing. Could this ever happen to us? Maybe if we find a way to get a lot of money? Or other valuable assets. So we talked to our accountant and they said finished beer is considered an asset. If we could just make more beer, we’d be on the path of getting rich. But that means we’d need to sell that beer to do so. So we responded to a few emails that claimed to only want a few moments of our time to talk about SEO and followers and brand recognition and vendor contact lists. They said, in order to sell beer, people need to find out about us, and we need to get more popular. We also need to optimize our exposure via online and in google searches, then we could attract influencers and post more pictures and videos of attractive people having fun while wearing our merchandise and drinking our beer. That would be ideal. Apparently, it doesn’t even matter what the beer is or what it tastes like, the beer is just a vehicle to make more money, so we can get rich. But - what if the beer is good too?! We needed to find this out, so we went to local trade forums and it seems like all these bros and bois ISO juice and sauce and thicc and smoothies and BBA and haze. We don’t know how to make many of those things, but we put some of the ingredients we had laying around the brewery all together and made a beer. We even added some Cryos. And it tastes good! Yum. Now we wait and watch the money come in so that someday we can be driven around in a Hummer limousine in real life with the actual John Wilson while we sip crispies and eat frozen pizza. That’s the dream right there.
Space For Rent IPA
IPA|7.0%|55 IBU
You know, there’s a whole lotta space for rent these days. But not like the space you want. LIVING SPACE? Is it up to date? Clean? In a convenient location? At an affordable rate? Pshhh. COMMERCIAL SPACE? Oh cool - an empty office building downtown with a NNN more than the actual $/sf. OPEN SPACE? Fuck off - that shit should be free. Even LITERAL SPACE is for rent. You wanna rent the moon or a star, that shit is fair game - just give an “official” website your money. And CONCEPTUAL SPACE IS FOR RENT, like Web 3.0, where a meme of you can exist in a cloud on a server where you buy and sell NFTs, along with groceries and other things to keep your virtual tamagotchi-self from dying. EVEN FIGURATIVE SPACE is for rent, like in your head, sometimes rent free, because it’s been infiltrated by another entity. HEAD SPACE! … Where are we going with all this? Um. Let’s see. So. This beer… is… about ALL OF THOSE SPACES because it’s a liquid convergence on an Ultra 4D triple axis - Galaxy hops take up the largest amount of space, Citra takes up the space between, and Cascade’s shrinking space reminds you of previous spaces. And all of this can be had for a non-contractual single transaction, essentially like renting a pint glass for a moment, but on your terms.
Up Chuck The Boogie IPA
IPA|6.5%|58 IBU
Fun fact: Chuck Shin, owner of the mini-empire known as Chuck’s Hop Shop, has been asking us for an exclusive IPA going on SIX YEARS. Yes, that’s also how long we’ve been in existence. And FINALLY we found a spot in our production schedule to have Chuck’s humans, representing all 3 locations, come down and help us brew a small batch of IPA. We even let them choose the hop bill! Which led to a never before used combination of HBC 630, Strata, Motueka, Galaxy, ADHA 218 resulting in a tropical smorgasbord that you can crush multiple pints of at any of their locations or ours, while you watch Chuck boogie in victory.
So Much Fun IPA
IPA|6.4%|60 IBU
You know what we haven’t had in a while? So much fun. Like, we’ve had some fun…but in small doses, accompanied with a side of anxiety and a slice of guilt…because it’s a weird time to have LOADS of fun with everything else going on around us and throughout the world. BUT, right now, at this very moment, there seems to be the tiniest reprieve in the storm, at least on the local level. It could be the eye of the hurricane or it could be the start of a new normal - we have NO FUCKING IDEA - but we’re going to try to let ourselves YOLO a little more in the interim. HUG YOUR FRIENDS! GO TO SHOWS! VISIT PLACES! DRINK SOME BEERS! LIKE THIS ONE! Which is loaded with sunny Mosaic, deep Cashmere, & soft Citra so that you get tropical highlights and juicy peaches shining through dark citrus pith and blackberries, wrapped up in dry little finish.
You Oughta Know
New Hop Pale|5.6%|45 IBU
We want you to know, that we are happy for you, and we wish nothing but the best for you both. We also want you to know about McKenzie hops - a new Oregon hop variety out of the West Coast Hop Breeding Company. It’s got notes of yellow peach, mandarin orange, white grapefruit, sticky pine resin, and a whisper of electric lettuce. We’re not here, to remind you, of the mess you left when you went away - that’s not our job. That said, it’s not fair to deny you of the hops we bear when we brew away. So, like, you oughta know…McKenzie.
Friends of Friends IPA
IPA|6.4%|45 IBU
Every time we visit Denver, Our Mutual Friend Brewing is a must stop. Their beers are fantastic, their vibe is welcoming, and they emphasize locally sourced ingredients - especially when it comes to malt. And thus, a collab was born! After settling on an IPA (obvs), we decided to emphasize local maltsters from both our regions in our base recipe - Troubadour Pevac Pilsner Malt from Fort Collins, CO; Skagit White Wheat from the Skagit Valley; and Linc Spelt from Othello, WA. As for hops - we used something familiar and predictable - Citra + Centennial - so that you (our drinkers) could pick up on the subtle differences from these unique and distinct base grains. The end result is a classic Hazy IPA that has delicate notes of water cracker and dried hay, along with a pop of ripe tangerine, ruby red grapefruit and blackberry, because it IS an IPA after all.
Take A Look IPA
IPA|6.9%|68 IBU
Hoppiness in the sky, I can go twice as high.Take a Look! It’s all Chinook! An old school hop bill.I can grow anywhereeeeCitrus to pine, straight off the bine,An old school hop bill.Iiiiiiiii can brew ANYTHING!Take a Look! It’s all Chinook! An old school hop bill.~~~Contributions of Chinook hops grown by Morrier Ranches, Roy Farms, Champoux Farms, and Coleman’s Alluvial Farm.
For Me This Is Heaven
Modern American Helles|5.3%|40 IBU
Our buddy Jimmy, who likes to wax poetic, once said “The first star I see may not be a star” and we were like, “Damn Jimmy that shit is deep.” And then we started to think about that, and other things - like beer styles and traditional flavor profiles and if it’d be possible to combine some of our favorite, yet disparate, things that could result in something entirely new, but also still as perceptible pieces and then Jimmy interrupted our thought process with “If not now when?” and we were like “Jeez Jimmy, so timely, so sentimental.” ANYWAYS - this base recipe started as a Munich-Style Helles - Pilsner malt with a splash of Munich, bittered with Magnum and flavored with Mittelfruh. But then we added a little Citra & Mosaic in the Whirlpool. And dry-hopped it with Citra & Mosaic Cryo. The result is essentially a low bitterness, slightly bready, highly aromatic hoppy lager. Can you still feel the butterflies? Can you still hear the last goodnight?
My, you have some time on your hands!
Love Is Blind IPA
IPA|6.7%|58 IBU
What if we didn’t tell you what hops were in our IPA? And you just had to try it out, sight unseen, hops unknown, to find out if you really liked the flavor and aroma profile? You might actually surprise yourself to know what hops are on the brew sheet, and fall in love with a variety you’d overlook on a normal beer menu, out in the real world. And you’d potentially miss all these aromas of bright pineapple, papaya, & hibiscus and flavors of sweet citrus that carry through to a soft yet pithy type of bitterness. And at the end of the glass, you have to decide, once and for all, to drink this IPA… FOR-EV-ER. In sickness and in health, good times and bad, this is your only IPA. Even if you find out this IPA might’ve wanted to be with another drinker, AFTER you already professed your commitment to it. Even if you find out its family is a bunch of weirdos. And their friends are insufferable and don’t even like you. Or they thought this entire experiment was just a game, and only signed on to it to get famous. But maybe, just maybe, you really DO fall in love with Australian Enigma hops without us telling you…ah shit. On that note, there is a little Citra and Mosaic in there doing the matchmaking.
Grandma Take Me Home
Double Oatmeal Brown w/ Coconut|7.5%|38 IBU
Mom and Dad went to a show
They dropped me off at Cloudburst yo
I kicked and screamed, said please don’t go
Grandma Take Me Home
I went inside and drank my beer
It was brown and strong and sweet
Toasted coconut wow that's neat
I woke up in my mother’s arms
Grandma Take Me Home
Yakima Freeze
Frozen Wet Hop Ale|6.4%|50 IBU
Frozen Wet Hops? FROZEN WET HOPS. That’s what’s in this beer. Like, they picked the hops and instead of conveying them to the kiln….they conveyed them to a flash freezer and sent them to a cold storage unit. And then, 4 months later, they showed up at our brewery….at -10 degrees. And we brewed with them the same we do with “regular” fresh wet hops. Technology, my dudes. It’s pretty fucking cool. ! ! ! ! !21#/bbl of Flash Frozen Wet Citra, Wet Mosaic, & Wet Simcoe from Wyckoff Farms.
Convenient Parking IPA
IPA|6.5%|55 IBU
You know when you find that perfect spot and it just makes your entire day? That’s what we intended to do with this beer - encapsulate that feeling in liquid form. It’s got our favorite lots of Citra, Mosaic, Strata, & Galaxy in it for a bright, fruity, fragrant, and complex blend of aromas you can just get lost in. And it’s got a splash of wheat and naked oats in there so the edges are soft. Consider it a small victory to celebrate, a pleasant matter of happenstance, a rewarding gesture of karma from the universe. Because times are tough…(thinking)...and the world is…(bites tongue)...and…can’t…help….FUCK RUSSIA! FUCK REGRESSIVE POLICIES ON WOMEN’S RIGHTS! FUCK RACIST POLICING! AND GERRYMANDERING! FUCK GREED! AND BILLIONAIRE’S SPACE PROGRAMS! THE WORLD IS MELTING! AND AND AND....Oh look, a perfect spot, right out front, just for me!
Crushcade Blast IPA
IPA|6.5%|55 IBU
Fucking beer. It’s so 2010s. And 2000s. 1990s also. But right now, in the 2020s, it’s pretty much DOA. Industry nerds are all like “Beer data declining equals numbers bad!” And you wanna know why? BC HARD SELTZER NO DUHS. It’s like carbonated water, but with alcohol and other flavors that taste like fruits! CRISPY! SNAPPY! REFRESHING! CHEMICALS! And so, we set out on a journey to follow this hot trend, because that’s what we’ve always done. Give the people what they want! Even if it’s the lowest common denominator! For our version, we wanted to go with a bright & zesty citrus forward profile - like LEMON, LIME, & TANGERINE….but we hit our first roadblock. We didn’t have any buckets of these flavors! And it was cold outside, so we didn’t feel like walking down to Pike Market to pick up ACTUAL lemons, limes, and tangerines. So we used what we had available to us - and incorporated a blend of Citra, Comet, Motueka, Triumph, and Cascade Cryo hops. As for the alcohol, we needed to make sugar water and again, the source was right in front of our faces - why not use some malt!? So we did. And lastly, for body & texture, we added some salts and white wheat because we lacked sodium citrate or potassium sorbate. It is what it is! ANYWAYS, today, we PROUDLY present to you, the newest offering of the HOTTEST international trend…wait….FUCK. We just made another IPA again, didn’t we?
That’s So Metaverse IPA
IPA|6.7%|63 IBU
Right now, you could be drinking this beer. At a bar or in your home or outside somewhere, possibly with a view!? And you’d smell and taste an amazing combination of Simcoe grown in the Yakima and Willamette Valley & Nelson Sauvin hops grown on the other side of the world. But SOMEDAY, when this beer no longer exists, you could still revisit it, along with that time and place, in CYBERSPACE. Because real life is slowly merging with a digital world, a new space out on another axis of reality, where infrastructure and holograms and experiences occur simultaneously with the physical world, but in a concurrent dimension, in a virtual interface, as lines blur between the two realms, existence is questionable, resistance is futile, this is the future, the billionaires have spoken, the planet is broken, a frontier at your fingertips while your fingers are in a bag of chips, Mmmm chips, this description has gotten away from us, so we’ll see you out there, in there, wherever that may be…
Dorty Work
Export Lager|5.6%|30 IBU
Hold onto your lederhosen you little lager heads! We've got work to drink! Dorty Work, to be precise. Our Dortmunder/Export - esque pale lager! [sidebar: if you’ve never heard of this style, or tried one before, it’s not your fault! We’ll simplify it for you - it’s kind of a hoppy Helles or more bitter Wiesn. Still lost? You’re not alone. Ok, it’s a lightish, slightly malty, gently hoppy, balanced & crisp crusher. Um, it’s like a touch more flavorful beer flavored beer. YOU KNOW BEER? YES! OK WELL THIS IS IT. Cool. I think we’re still technically in a sidebar so we’re gonna finagle our way out of it now.] This beer was brewed with Weyermann Pilsner & Vienna malt, hopped with Magnum, Mitteflruh, Tettnang from Deutschland, and is built for your consumption! Prost!
Same Ghost Every Night IPA
Forever haunted.
IPA|7.2%|60 IBU
We keep our heads down quite a bit, as we grind out new IPA recipes every other week. But every once in a while, we look up and take a step back - sometimes, to find we’ve been walking in circles on the same track. The last time we brewed this recipe, it was just before the pandemic hit, and it was well received despite the impending global upheaval. A simple base of Rahr 2 row - and a citrus driven hop combination of Citra, Amarillo, Hop 522 & NZ Cascade. There’s zesty nuance and delicious layers of juicy essence, some dark fruit, as well as a little bit of dankness you’ve grown accustomed to - yet still, this beer is hauntingly recognizable. Sometimes you need to go walking, just to find, your own breath.
Forever haunted.
Zappa Dappa Do IPA
IPA|6.7%|60 IBU
You know, hops have been used almost exclusively for brewing purposes for roughly 1,200 years - BUT they’ve likely been around for as long as the earth has. Like, when dinosaurs were around - so were wild hops. Isn’t that some crazy shit? And while the majority of modern hops have been selected and bred to our desired usage - there’s a couple available to us that are essentially wild, found & cultivated by Todd Bates in New Mexico, the guru of wild hops. One of those ones? Well, it’s in this beer. Zappa is grown at CLS Farms in Moxee, and growing/picking/drying it is a labor of (intensive) love. It doesn’t want to trellis, it continuously flowers & cones, and the timing of maturity is much of mystery. It’s flavors are intense and often clash with others - which is why we paired it with Citra in this recipe - because Citra plays nice with others. The end result is juicy and complex - we get tangerine, white pineapple, fresh cut fir, & mango salsa. Warning: If you happen to pair this beer with fish tacos, you will drink and eat too much of each.
KEVIN!!!
Cold IPA|6.4%|65 IBU
Geez, Kevin Davey at Wayfinder Beer might have really started something with the whole Cold IPA thing. Look what he did, that little jerk. Brewer’s all over the country are making them, it’s like a disease. But a delicious one. So, we sat down in our home, alone, to write a recipe. This is it. Don’t get scared now. We put together a hop bill of Warrior Extract, Mosaic, Simcoe, Cascade, & Citra, which turned out to be, what the French say, Le Délicieuse. So, go ahead, eat junk food and watch rubbish and crush this beer. Nobody is going to come out and stop you. You guys give up? Or are you thirsty for more? The answer is obviously thirsty for more...
Whichever You Prefer IPA
IPA|6.6%|58 IBU
Breathe in for hops, Breathe in so deepThis can is blessed, you share with meThis week is wild, so calm and dullThese hops they race, no self controlOur blend is smooth, as they graze bines, we’re brewing fine, we’re brewing nothing at all……actually, we’re brewing an IPA. And we emotionally overcompensated our hop bill with Idaho 7, Amarillo, Citra & Talus for to fill or burst, break or bury, trade for jewelry, whichever you prefer.HANDS DOWN THIS IS THE BEST BEER WE CAN EVER REMEMBER…
Who’s In Charge Here?
DIPA|7.8%|65 IBU
Oh, well wouldn’t YOU like to know. WE HAVE NO CLUE EITHER. But if you find out, we’d like to also have a word with them! Because we’re running around with our heads cut off, trying to keep the ship afloat AND on course, while putting out fires everywhere, while also playing whack-a-mole with one hand and shuffleboard with the other with a third one behind our back, while ALSO trying to remember what we were just about to do, before we were just about say to something… Luckily for you, we managed to find some free time to build this DIPA on a healthy foundation of Rahr 2 Row and Simpsons Golden Naked Oats, and then we hopped the EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF IT with a newer experimental hop variety called HBC 586, along with a supporting trifecta of Citra, Mosaic, Simcoe, so that you can stop everything and have a brief yet intense moment of hoppiness amidst the never-ending chaos that is our lives. Oh wow mmmm…tangerines, and papaya, and red jolly ranchers, and WHAT NOW JESUS!?!
Infinite Time Loop Situation IPA
IPA|6.9%|60 IBU
So, this is today. Today is yesterday. And tomorrow is also today. And this IPA? Well it’s hopped with Citra & Mosaic, and then Mosaic & Citra. Both Pellets & Cryo. Over and over again. IN PERPETUITY. It’s like you’ve had this before. But not THIS one, that was another one. And it’s also like you’ll have it again - this very one - right now, a little bit later, further down the road, a road that never ends, that goes on and on. But it’s OK! You know why? Because it tastes FUCKING GLORIOUS. Who doesn’t want a forever of smooth, juicy, citrusy and tropical highs and lows? Nobody. That’s who.
That Funny Feeling IPA
IPA|6.4%|53 IBU
Pandemic storm surge, cancellations, better call your mom Supply side issues, shoulder shrugs, all our malt is gone West Coast Hazy Juicy Thing, something for you all White Wheat, Naked Oats - good for body, softened fall Year end open hop bags, throw them all in, have no fear Loral, Citra, Experimentals, getting mental, it’s only beerMosaic, Galaxy and Cryos, on a spaceship, drop the ballEndless streaming service, Bo Burnham’s beard, the hopping of it all. Hey what can you say, we just had to brew. But it’ll be over soon, you wait.
Once Upon A Party IPA
IPA|6.5%|65 IBU
There once was a time, not long ago, in what feels like a far away place, where people would gather and unwind and celebrate and often partake and occasionally get schmammered and infrequently divulge in TOO much fun, which could lead to a GREAT NIGHT followed by a ROUGH MORNING. Remember high fives and hugging your friends and sharing sips of the SAME beer and talking a little too close so that spit would accidentally fly into each other’s faces and you’d laugh about it aloud as opposed to thinking “YOU MOTHERFUCKER JUST GAVE ME GERMS THAT COULD FUCKING KILL ME!”...Anyways, this beer is to celebrate all the good times we had, all the ok times we still have, and all the better times we’ll have some day…hopefully, soon. ~~~Galaxy, Strata, Amarillo hash, Citra
Birthday Czech
Czech Pilsner|5.5%|43 IBU
This beer is the equivalent of a birthday card from your grandparent that includes a nice cursive note and a $5 bill. It’s simple, it’s timeless, it’s predictable, it’s cute, and it ignores inflation in perpetuity. Like, it was $5 when you were 6 and it was $5 when you were 27. Back then, you could actually buy a toy or pack of baseball cards with $5. But now? Umm. Well, you can at least buy a pint of THIS beer. YEP! That’s RIGHT! It’s going to be $5 on draft at both our spots! Like the good old days! So there’s that! Happy Birthday, Child!
Darkenfloxx
Drip Off?
Fancy Beer|9.3%|60 IBU
This delightfully dreadful Imperial Stout was inspired by a short story by George Saunders. Heaping amounts of Roasted Barley and Chocolate malt lay a foundation for Lighthouse coffee and Hazelnut oil. The result is an evil concoction that is as dangerously strong as it is pleasantly drinkable…
“Drip on?”…”Acknowledge.”
Drip Off?
Nom Nom For Us
Mmm DAVID!
Fancy Beer|9.2%|48 IBU
Mmm David! This Imperial Stout is just...YUMMO. It was first aged in a Buffalo Trace oak barrel! AND THEN, it was aged on whole Marionberries from Sidhu Farms (Puyallup) and Madagascar Vanilla Beans! Wow. Wow. Wow-ee. YEP. After a few sippies, you won’t even remember your previous life as a socialite/muse/pop star, and most certainly not the lyrics to your hit song...La la lalalala - a little bit of ‘lexis….
(This description will make zero sense if you don’t watch Schitt’s Creek. And if you don’t, you should.)
Mmm DAVID!
Old Tubthumper
It got knocked down, and it did not get up again.
Fancy Beer|11.9%|47 IBU
I get knocked down! But I get up again! You’re never gonna keep me down! I get knocked down! But I get up again! You’re never gonna keep me down! I get knocked down! But I get up again! You’re never gonna keep me down! I get knocked down! But I get up again. You’re never gonna keep me down. I get knocked down. But I get up again. You’re never gonna keep me down. I get knocked down but I get up again. You’re never gonna keep me down. I get knocked down but I get up again you’re never gonna keep me down. I get knocked down...get up again...keep me down. I get knockd down. buuuut getup’gainyur nevgonna keep ME. Doown! I getttttttt...zzzzzzzz.
~ ~ ~
55% Aged in Stainless + 30% Aged in Westland American Whiskey Barrels + 15% Aged in Westland Peated Barrels
It got knocked down, and it did not get up again.
Willett or Won’t It
Fancy Beer|9.4%|63 IBU
This beer was destined for oak. We chose it’s destiny. But what oak? No idea. Luckily, a brewery down the road happened to have one extra barrel from Willett Distillery in Bardstown, KY at just the right moment. With notes of sweet bourbon, milk chocolate, fruity cocoa nibs, & vanilla beans, sometimes things work out.
The CDC Says
Pale|5.7%|45 IBU
The CDC says there are healthy benefits to drinking 1 beer a day.The CDC says having 1-2 beers a day is perfectly normal in times like these.The CDC says NZ Rakua, Citra, & Mosaic Cryo make for a delicious hop combination.The CDC says it’s better to inhale that aroma in short bursts, with your mouth open, to maximize perception.The CDC says as long as you’re using proper glassware, you can have another beer.The CDC says if you drink smaller amounts of multiple beers in a row it’s technically a flight.The CDC says it doesn’t matter how many beers you drink in a day, so long as it’s done in the evening.The CDC says as long as you eat some carbs to soak the alcohol up, it doesn’t count as binge drinking.The CDC says CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!The CDC says FUCK IT, pull your pants down and put that butt funnel straight into your anus bc 2022.
Not A Scientist
Doesn't Matter.
DIPA|8.4%|68 IBU
Back by pandemic demand! It’s crazy to think the first time we brewed this beer was 2019…before a global pandemic would upheave our, and your, entire world. Also, encourage a whole lotta of NON-SCIENTISTS to come out of the woodwork.A second reminder that, we’re no scientist, nor is this beer, but let US tell YOU our completely unfounded opinion based on our myopic, personal experiences and a touch of random, select, unverified information. You should still listen to us (obviously) because we are fortunate enough to have a platform and we feel important and we TALK LOUD sometimes. So, here’s what’s going on with this beer. We made some hopped wort (lots of science did this - like malting and enzymes and isomerization and shit) and then we knocked out onto Mosaic cryogenically frozen powderized hop matter concentrate and saccharomyces cerevisiae so that biotransformation of hoppy stuff would occur while the yeast metabolized maltose, maltotriose, & sucrose while creating new esters and alcohols and stuff. We THEN added some Strata hops - which are this new, genetically unique variety of humulus lupulus developed by actual scientists at Oregon State University. These hops smell like tangerines and passion fruit because of all that crazy science wizardry, which allowed for that specific essential oil & terpine combination to prevail. At the end of the day, all this stuff results in us believing that we are experts in the field of Double IPA making, the greatest style of all the beer styles in the world. Truth.
Doesn't Matter.
Barreling Towards Earth IPA
IPA|6.8%|68 IBU
It started off like any normal Tuesday. Crosby Hop Farm had sent us some 2021 samples of other hop varieties to select, and they threw in an extra bag of their estate grown Comet, which we saved for the end. At first, it seemed like an interesting little blip, notes of citrus & pine with a touch of grass, but nothing out of the ordinary. And then it seemingly opened up, approaching more aggressively with ripe tangerine and lime peel, so much so we had to take a step back. This doesn’t seem like an ordinary lot of comet. And the path it’s taking, a course directly aimed at our domes, is quite concerning to say the least. Should we let our friends know? Should we call our loved ones? Or, just let them brew in blissful ignorance? Whatever our future is, we had to MOVE FAST. Get CROSBY on the line! We need these hops STAT! If we don’t get these hops in this beer RIGHT. NOW. it may never exist. And, all of our customers - our regulars, our family, random people - won’t know what’s coming there way, a FUCKING Comet IPA, that could alter their lives and perceptions, forever.
CHUNDERDOME IPA
IPA|6.5%|60 IBU
SNOW. IS ON. THE MOUNTAINS! Therefore, you must hit the slopes. It’s quite simple. There are no rules. Just shred, rip, slash, gash, and gnash through that frothy stash. And when you’re finished, assuming you make it out alive - recharge and rehydrate (kinda) with this cruiser of an IPA charged with Simcoe, Mosaic , & Citra, plus a Columbus Cryo kicker and a flurry of Talus - which can be found on tap at the Snorting Elk and both our tasting rooms ALL. WINTER. LONG. That’s right - a draft only seasonal IPA. Like the good ‘ole days. This is Chunderdome.
Change My Mind IPA
IPA|6.9%|63 IBU
Cascade hops are the most important hop variety in the world.The modern American craft brewing industry wouldn’t exist without them.They’ve been grown for almost 50 years!You can use them in pretty much every single beer style.They are recognizable, approachable, and complex.They often exhibit notes of lemon, pine, grapefruit, black tea and fresh flowers.They will outlast us all.Change Your Mind.~~~~~~~41% US Cascade from Tributary Farm41% NZ Cascade from Freestyle Hop Farm10% Citra from Gasseling Ranches8% Cascade Cryo from Tributary FarmRahr 2-Row, Weyermann Pils, Carafoam, Acidulated
Statistically Speaking IPA
IPA|6.8%|55 IBU
Of all the hop combinations in our cooler, we’re confident that Mosaic, El Dorado, Azacca, BRU-1 are a never before seen cluster that somehow must have been an exclusive disjunction. You’ve got an interquartile range of pineapple highlights and apricot undertones with gentle, floral outliers and a lingering pithy residual. To round out this actualized, exhaustive observation, we used 3 types of Oats in the malt bill - Simpson GNO, Crisp Naked Oats, & Skagit Black Oats - another velutinous anomaly to the standard deviation. This beer is by no means a conditional antecedent, think of it more as an extrapolation of a self-selected sample variance. And yes, we barely passed statistics in undergrad, but this by no means is a breakdown point. Ok, now go scatterplot!
Clear History…
Deleted!
Throwback Pale|5.8%|57 IBU
You know when you’re browsing the internet and start to feel a little frisky? Oh you know. YEAH YOU DO. Like, you’re just messing around, enjoying a pale ale and your mind starts to wander into what other pale ales are out there and what goes into them and where are they made and how do they do it and when did they become a normal thing. And you’re getting super comfortable and into it and you decide you’re going to make a pale ale, right then and there, so you start to slowly open bags of 2 row and FUCK IT a whole bag of Crystal T-50 and shit’s starting to get HOPPY so you rip open bags of Chinook AND Simcoe AND Centennial and JUST SHOVE YOUR FACE IN THEM AND INHALE ALL THEIR FRUITY AND RESINOUS ODORS AHHHHHHHH THE GLORY OF YAKIMAAAA! And then suddenly, you’re all awkward and are like, was that weird? Maybe we should just keep this to ourselves, and might as well cover our tracks too for good measure, nothing to see here, just a classic NW pale ale for you to enjoy.
Deleted!
Easy Peezy
Modern Pale Ale|6.1%|53 IBU
Sometimes we take a little risk with our pale ales. Mostly, by using a hop we’ve never brewed with before. We kinda do this a lot - use our pales as a proving ground for experimental hop varieties. But every once in a while, it’s nice to just go with a sessionable version of a hop combination we know and love, forever and ever. And this beer is one of the latter. A simple base, with a little Skagit Red & White Wheat for mouthfeel. And then a combination of Citra from Gasseling Ranches and Strata + Strata Hash from Crosby Hop Farm. It’s juicy and fruity and easy and peezy. Mmm. Yummo. No thinkie, just drinkie.
Perfect Attendance IPA
IPA|7.0%|57 IBU
We’ll give you this, Sabro. When we add you to a beer, you are assertively present. Even in small doses. Like this one. You make up 20% of the entire hop bill - which is like, double what we usually do, but there’s still a whole lot of Citra (50%) and Idaho 7 (30%). And while we enjoy your presence - in all your key lime, cedar and beach coconut husk glory - you certainly create a challenge as far as recipe development goes. So much so, you’re kinda annoying. Like, not only do we have to THINK about our total hop bill, but drinkers are catching on and paying attention too. We get it, you’re unique, but please play nice with other hops, especially your elders.
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English Dark Mild|4.1%|30 IBU
Believe it or not, this our THIRD dark mild recipe - i.e. Gen 3, as the kids say. And everytime we make one of these, we can’t help thinking (& drinking) about Bill’s Dark Mild over at Machine House Brewery, 5840 Airport Way S #121, Seattle, WA 98108. That beer is just perfect. It’s rich, roasty and complex, yet unbelievably crushable. Just WOW. So good. And take it from us - we’re experts. So you’re probably wondering, why keep making a version of one if Bill’s is the unattainable pinnacle of the style. Well, for a few reasons. 1. To draw your attention to a style AND a brewery that deserves more love. 2. To show you how much better Bill’s is than ours...that said, we still think ours is top notch for an “IPA Brewer.” 3. Bill doesn’t package any of his beer in cans (just casks, bottles for $6 and 4l boxes for $35), so we can at least offer you an additional benefit of convenience. 4. To coerce Bill into an awkward photoshoot. 5. There’s plenty of space to Dark Mild. If you drink it, and tell your friends, more will show up. #mildmovement
Please Hold For The Next Available Representative
DIPA|8.3%|62 IBU
Hello. Your call is important to us. Please hold for the next available representative. If you know your party’s extension, please press it at any time. Listen carefully as our menu options have changed. To add Rahr 2 Row, press “1”. To add a splash of Skagit white wheat, please press “2”. To add Citra, press “3”. To add Galaxy, press “4”. To add Vic Secret, press “5”. To add Imperial Corporate Ale yeast, press “6.” To hear the options again, press “*” or stay on the line. We’re sorry, we can’t understand the screaming tropical deliciousness spewing into the receiver. If you need assistance, please finish the beer in your mouth before talking and stay on the line. Goodbye.
Watch Til The End IPA
IPA|6.7%|60 IBU
Oh hey you whatcha’ scrolling? You on the Tok? Cool. Us too. We Tik the shit out of the interweb all day, every day. It’s kinda a passion - like you can find anything on there, and it’s all like 5 seconds long, and some of these things make you laugh and some make you cry and some are boring and some are weird...BUT OUR FAVE VIDS ARE THE ONES WITH THE TWIST ENDING. Like, this brewery is making an IPA and talking about the hops they use in it and it’s like Citra (YEAHHH!) and Mosaic (THE BEST.) and then they drop a bomb on you with Columbus Cryo. COLUMBUS?! WTF BRO?! My Dad doesn’ even think that shit is cool (he’s #teamcentennial btw) so then you start wondering if you’re being played and the jokes on you. But then, it’s actually not, because this old OG dank hop in modern form is actually LEGIT. Like, blood orange flesh meets sappy, sticky pine resin that’ll just leave you shook, thinking about life and heavy stuff, for like 5 seconds, and then on we go, down the wormhole, more content please!
Circle Yes Or No IPA
IPA|6.6%|65 IBU
Ok, drinker. We’ve been brewing with HBC Hop 630 going on 5 years now, and it’s been feathered in quite a few of our beers. It’s also been featured in our friend’s beers from around the country - like Bale Breaker, Fremont, Cellarmaker, Trillium, Cerebral, Odell & Pinthouse, to name a few. But, ultimately, YOU will decide the trajectory and fate of this hop. So, this time around, we added Strata & Mosaic to the party, over a softened mash thanks to Skagit Red Wheat, Skagit White Wheat, and Crisp Naked Oats. The end result is tangerine, rainier cherry, white grapefruit and anticipation for you to give us our note back.
Tell Me More
Experimental Pale Ale|6.0%|52 IBU
During the deluge of wet hops, we were made aware of a cool new hop in the experimental pipeline - ADHA 218. And we were like - WOAH! COOL! CAN WE HAZ?! WAIT. NO ROOM IN TANKS. BUT PLEASE GIVE. - because that’s how our minds compute new variables during the chaos of harvest. BUT, we were hella curious and lined up a box from Roy Farms to save for later. Well guess what?! LATER IS NOW. And this hop is pretty crazy!! There’s so much tropical fruit that it’s reminiscent of drinking a fruity cocktail on a sunny beach. Which we all need. LIKE RIGHT NOW. But we can’t. So we won’t. But this beer will suffice in the interim.
‘Tis The Damn Season
Tis Out of Season.
Hoppy Red Ale|6.4%|45 IBU
Oh, November in Seattle. With rain and the cold, comes anticipation and celebration. But what happens when you can’t find it? We could call it even, and you can drink this beer for the weekend. Tis the damn season, write this down. We’re brewing in a malty ‘house, and the red not taken looks real good now. Pine flies, hoppy like the bite from the old times. Now we’re missing old times, hear us out. We could just ride around and drink northwest red ale hopped with Chinook & Simcoe all damn year. Why don’t we do that? WHY CAN’T WE JUST HAVE THIS ONE THING ALL YEAR ROUND. If it’s ok with you, it’s ok with us. And Taylor Swift.
Tis Out of Season.
Brontosaurus Supernova IPA
IPA|6.5%|50 IBU
We first brewed this beer for Beer Junction’s 6th Anniversary back in 2016. It was an IPA with dinosaurs and supernovas and space and hops and other great amazing things that make beer! It was also about supporting a small business with exceptional practices, offering fresh beer to the tight knit West Seattle community. The beer was a hit! And we said we’d never brew it again! But in 2019, word got around that Morgan was battling Multiple Myeloma and after a couple conversations, we agreed to bring this beer back, so long as the profits would go to Fred Hutch earmarked for MM research. Shortly after our last exchange, Morgan passed away. The pandemic was taking off and we were forced to table the beer once more, until we could celebrate Morgan - which is NOW! Like, TODAY! In the interim, our friends at Skagit Valley Malt got wind of a great cause and donated the malt. As for hops, it’s the same bill as before - GALAXY (duh), CITRA, MOSAIC, SIMCOE and MANDARINA. On that note, a cheers to you Morgan - Here’s to good people gone too soon, here’s to hope and faith in scientific research, and here’s to keeping promises to friends, past and present. And to dinosaurs, in space, wearing spacesuits, shooting lasers.
Even More So IPA
IPA|7.5%|73 IBU
We’ve seen the pendulum swing back and forth on IPA preferences for DECADES. That’s how old we are. And it’s also why our IPAs often pick and choose from several IPA substyles, a hybrid of sorts. But this one, we went full send on a WEST COAST rendition. How WC? Very West. Like, go West, and when you get there, go FURTHER. Even more so. Why? Because this beer is LOADED with Simcoe, Mosaic, & Citra hops. And it’s kinda clear. And it’s pretty bitter. But it all works out. Some think West Coast IPA is Dead. We think not.
Put Away Wet
Wet Hop IPA|6.5%|65 IBU
Our final wet hop brew of the season! We did 11 beers, 17 turns, which was ~250 total barrels. Plus, 3 more collab brews away from home. We drove 2,372 miles on 13 trips to 9 farms for 11 total varieties, back and forth, forever. We ate 43 tacos, 14 burritos, and a few tortas and tamales to boot. Also 1 quesadilla. Not gonna lie, we’re pretty tired. But that pales in comparison to the farmers, farmhands, agronomists, process operators, warehousers, & countless others that worked everyday, on long shifts, for 40 days straight. So let’s give it up to the people in hops, as none of these amazing beers would be possible without them! It’s been one helluva harvest, and we’re going out hard with 23#/bbl of Talus from Perrault Farms that results in an explosion of bright, tropical and citrus notes all the way through. It doesn’t get any wetter than this!
Wet Blanket
Wet Hop IPA|6.7%|65 IBU
A lot of people say “Nobody likes a wet blanket”...Well, we’re here to look those people in the eyes and say “How UNTRUE!” Because LOTS of people will like this Wet Blanket. It’s loaded with 20#/bbl of Yakima’s finest Cashmere, grown by Cornerstone Ranches. It’s complex, it’s soft, it’s deep, it’s chewy, it’s fruity, it’s WET. You’ll want to get all wrapped up notes of blackberry, blood orange, pine needles & kelp. Get cozy, pour yourself a wet blanket, and ENJOY it.
Wetness Protection Program
Try and find it. You can't.
Wet Hop IPA|6.4%|65 IBU
Look, we’re no angels nor is this Mosaic. We’ve both done some shit. And we’ve definitely SEEN a whole lotta shit. Too much shit. So much shit that we both think it’s time to lay low and get off the grid. We’re gonna stop using the word “shit” now. Because this beer is definitely not shit. It is THE shit. Dammit, ok that was the last one! Before we go hide away until next harvest, this lot of Wet Mosaic from Perrault Farms is so ridiculously insane - candied pineapple, wisp of passionfruit, hint of blueberry, touch of tangerines - that we know you’ll be remembering it for years to come. Just don’t remember it TOO hard - we don’t want to cause no trouble.
Try and find it. You can't.
What are you even doing down here?!?
Wet Is As Wet Does
Wet Hop IPA|6.7%|65 IBU
Some might think of Chinook as a simple hop. An afterthought. #oldnews Like, it HAS been around since 1985. But if you’ve been paying attention, some of your favorite brewers have been sprinkling it in your IPAs and Pales and Stouts and Reds - forever, every year, and more and more these days. In fact, some of the most award winning IPAs in our region have substantial amounts of Chinook in them - ever heard of Bodhi? How about Breakside IPA? Pizza Port? Pfriem IPA? What about us? You’ve heard of us, right? So yeah, it’s kinda a big deal. And this lot from Roy Farms in Moxee has all those classic notes of grapefruit and pine - but also pineapple & spruce, characteristics often observed specifically in Roy Farm’s lots. Don’t underestimate this old timer - its staying power and prominence in PNW beer will keep it around for years to come. Papa always said, “wet is as wet does."
Wet Brurrito
Wet Hop IPA|6.9%|59 IBU
This freshie is ALL about those Brulotte Farms Extra Verde BRU-1 hops. Grown in partnership with Haas, BRU-1 hops are fairly new to the scene and are starting to gain some traction thanks to big notes of pineapples & nectarines with a little peppery spiciness to boot. Not unlike some fruity/spicy salsa you might find at one of the many amazing taco trucks and spots around the Yakima Valley. MMM TACOS. Oh yeah also MMM WET HOPS.
As God Is My Wetness
Wet Hop IPA|6.7%|64 IBU
Our Citra, who art in Yakima, hallowed be thy bine, as fresh as it is heaven. Give us our oils, our daily alphas. And forgive us bite, as we forgive those who bittered before us. Deliver us from haze, and temptation of rapid consumption, for the power and GLORY OF ALL THAT IS CITRA! WITH CITRA BY OUR SIDE, WE CAN BREW ANYTHING! AND WHEN IT’S THE BESTEST LOFTUS CITRA THIS IS SOME LEGIT ULTRABEAM GOD DREAM KANYE LEVEL SHIT. DID WE EVER TELL YOU THE STORY ABOUT THE FOOTPRINTS IN THE HOP FIELD?! THERE’S LIKE TWO SETS, AND THEN ONE SET, AND WE’RE LIKE ‘WHAT’S UP WITH THAT?’ AND GOD IS ALL LIKE, THOSE ARE STILL YOUR FOOTPRINTS BRO, I HAD TO LEAVE YOU FOR A HOT MINUTE BECAUSE IT’S HARVEST AND ALL THESE DOPE CITRA BEERS ARE BEING RELEASED AND THEY ONLY LAST FOR SO LONG….
Green on Fort Road
Wet Hop Pale|5.8%|50 IBU
ALL ABOARD THE FORT ROAD EXPRESS!! First stop: Green Acres Farm, where we’ll be picking up 100# of fresh Cascade. Then, we pass VGF (wave everybody!) as we head to Joe Champoux Farms for 50# of mystery hops. What variety are they? Nobody knows! There was a mix up at the nursery! But they smell nice and fruity! Ok, onto the last stop at Cornerstone Ranches for 150# of extra piney Simcoe. Give Danessa and Graham a high five, and now we head back to the city to cram all these greenies into a sessionable Pale Ale base recipe! CHOO CHOO!
An Uplifting Work of Staggering Wetness
Wet Hop IPA|6.5%|65 IBU
This freshie is all about overcoming a series of unpredictable events. The original farm we planned to grab the Simcoe from was on pause, dealing with the results of a rainstorm. This led us to sourcing Simcoe elsewhere - a necessity that had to be done swiftly, considerately, and concertedly. Loftus Ranches came through in the pinch with 500# of first picks - a welcome relief. But that following brewday, a part failed on our kettle burner mid usage. Fortunately, we had ordered a spare part the week before - on a hunch, no less! After an emotional and timely repair, we persevered through the brew day, to a victorious result. What does victory taste like? It tastes like ruby red grapefruit, fir tips, tangerine peel, and grass clippings. When the going gets wet, the wet gets wetting even more so.
Green Is My Favorite Color
Wet Hop IPA|6.0%|60 IBU
It’s true. Green IS our favorite color. It’s just so versatile. It can be bright, it can be light, it can be dark, it can be camouflage, it can be neon, it can be almost grey or brown but not really, or it can be unquestionably...green. Where are we going with this...nobody knows. Amarillo is Spanish for “yellow” though. And, yellow and green are pretty close in color. AND, this beer was brewed with GREEN AMARILLOS from Virgil Gamache Farms to the tune of 18# per barrel - pretty crazy, huh? So here it is - in all it’s fresh and wet and dank and citrus glory.
Aqua Seafoam Shame
Wet Hop IPA|6.4%|60 IBU
We have a confession to make. Again! We drove down to Goschie Farms in Oregon to make this beer - because last year’s was such a hit. But seriously - what else should we be? All Apologies? We brew wet hop beers multiple times a week, for six weeks in a row. Why not make a few with Oregon hops? I mean, they do grow one of the hottest new varieties in the country - Strata - which was developed by Indie Hops in conjunction with Oregon State University. And with assertive tropical notes of guava & passion fruit and a citrus leafy finish thanks to 20#/bbl, you’ll be easily amused. All in all is all we are.
It’ll All Be Oatay
Oatmeal Stout|5.0%|40 IBU
We know hop harvest is quite the distraction (at least it is for us!) but when we pick our heads up, the world still seems quite insane - the delta variant, hurricanes, wildfires, Florida being horrible, Texas being WORSE…UGHHH. BUT! MAYBE. JUST MAYBE. Things are going to work out? Like this is the part of the real life movie where you hit rock bottom and the world is about to crumble but then the good guys persevere and start kicking ass, make positive strides, solve some problems, and live on happily ever after? We hope?! RIGHT? Um, what else. This beer! Let’s talk about it for a second. Honestly, it’s pretty straightforward and downright delightful. Some roasty aromas, a silky body, a chocolatey finish, a sessionable abv....it’s here for you, a rich and comfy beverage, with a positive outlook on the future.
Unlimited Breadsticks
Italian Pilsner|5.5%|35 IBU
MAMA MIA! We made an Italian Pilsner! What makes it Italian?! Well, we used German malts (Weyermann Pils), German Lager yeast (thanks Chuckanut!), and Czech & German hops (some Saaz, but mostly Saphir)....AND THEN WE DRY HOPPED IT! SEI FUORI! Yeah, that’s pretty much what this style is...which to us, is about as Italian as Olive Garden. VUOI LIMONARE? But a couple Italian breweries have been doing this for a couple decades, so CHE STORIA! Now it’s a hot ticket style and delicious and refreshing and nutritious! ADESSO PEDALA! BON JOURNO! CHE PALLE!
A Little Space
Pale|5.8%|57 IBU
Hey. Look at us. Right in the eyes. No blinking. Ok. This beer. Read the name. Got it? Ok, and then here’s the hop bill - Chinook, Galaxy, Citra, & Amarillo. Sound familiar? And then a malt bill of ⅔ 2 row and ⅓ Castle Pale. Is this adding up? But then, a toned down gravity - resulting in a “little” version. Get it? A LITTLE SPACE….DUST?! OHHHH SNAP! WE GOT YOU!! DON’T SLEEP ON US GOLIATH, YOU FUCKING CORPORATE MONSTER. WE WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER. WE WILL ALWAYS COME AT YOU. WE WILL ALWAYS FUCK AB-INBEV.
No Recess IPA
IPA|6.8%|65 IBU
We last brewed this beer in 2017!? That’s madness. The original description still holds true - we’ve STILL been working around the clock for what seems like forever to keep Cloudburst moving forward - from tasting room procedures to canning lines - but our lack of recess is to your benefit. We brought back this NW IPA loaded with Chinook, Citra, Amarillo & Centennial for a welcome break from the grind.
Mosaicin’ My Day!
DIPA|8.0%|65 IBU
Once, maybe twice, we brewed this “single” hop Mosaic IPA called “Mosaicin’ Me Crazy”. It was a bright, multi-dimensional expression of one of the best American IPA hops in existence (and, was a rejected Holy Mountain beer name that we picked up off the cutting ‘doom’ floor and put to good use). ANYWAYS - this is basically an imperial version of that - 5 unique lots of Mosaic from 4+ farms from 3 total harvests in 2 types of pellets. The end result is loaded with notes of ripe pineapple, tangerines, and passion fruit that will have you saying MO’ PLEASE!
Grainyard Graveyard IPA
IPA|6.6%|52 IBU
You know when that one wildcard friend goes up to a soda fountain in a taco bell and puts a splash of everything in their 24oz cup? We call that a “graveyard”. And we kinda did that with our malt bill on this beer. Like, we added 2 row, and Pils malt, and white wheat, and red wheat, and naked oats, and flaked barley, and flaked rye and carafoam and And ANDDDDDD maybe we got carried away. But it was fun at the time. And it tastes fun today - with layers of depth and body. To make it palatable, we hopped it with some NZ Cascade, Mosaic, & Citra to give it reliable, yummy notes of tropical fruit and citrus. So go ahead - push all the buttons!
And Another One IPA
IPA|6.8%|57 IBU
CAN WE HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE. DEE-JAY CLOUDBURSTALL WE DO IS WIN, WIN, WIN (and brew hops).DEE-JAY CLOUDBURSTWE GOING CRAZYINTRODUCINGSTRATA! (en fuego papi)CASH-MERE! (looks soft can i touch)CITRA! (gimme the juice)IDAHO 7! (honky sauce)THIS IS THE REMIXDEE-JAY CLOUDBURSTTHANKFUL.
“Bill”
Experimental Pale Ale|6.2%|45 IBU
We all know James Bond is Agent 007….but what about 008? Apparently, they call him Bill? Is he as cool as James? Is he a nerd and only deals with cyber criminals and crypto theft? What about rogue experimental breeding of agricultural triploid genomic species? We don’t know. But we do know that this new HRC experimental hop variety also known as 008 is grown at Crosby Farm. And it exhibits notes of nectarine, lime flesh, & lemongrass, which should mean it will live on, and expand its reach, and may someday be seen throughout the public market. So it's got that going for it.
Your Worst Nightmare
Dark Stuff|7.0%|30 IBU
Imagine a bleak alternative reality where no new hop varieties were ever developed or evolved. Brewers still use them, but just for bittering. That’s it. And when harvest comes around every year, there are no fresh hop beers, because they would all just taste like dirt and earth and grass. BUT, in their place, pumpkin beers fill the craft beer landscape - flooding the Fall market with vegetable beers. Every warm shelf and tap is taken over by jack-o-lantern themed beers with names like “YUM YUM PUMPKIN!” and “DREAMY HALLOWEENY” and “PUMP FLUFF MUFFIN” that make you want to stab your jugular with a pumpkin carving knife. And, every single offering has that blend of familiar spices, but at least they vary in color and base style. Some breweries are so prolific in their pumpkin brewing prowess that they not only attract attention from every beer nerd, but also Big Beer. AB-Inbev sees this growing market and wants -NEEDS- to be a player in it, so they start buying up independent breweries, one by one, slowly at first, then at rampant pace, until they confuse the consumer with so many options nobody knows who owns what anymore, creating customer indifference in ownership and operations and origins among the sea of SKUs, where only the deepest of pockets prevail, squeezing out small, independent, locally-owned and operated breweries until there are few left. In this Cantwellian Dystopia, THIS beer would be KING - a milk chocolatey base beer brewed with Libby’s canned pumpkin and spiced with a blend of cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, allspice and clove. OK WAKE UP! It was all a dream...WAIT BUT...
Bad With Directions IPA
IPA|6.7%|65 IBU
It starts at point A. Yep, that’s the starting point - a light grain bill of 2-row cut with some pilsner malt. Add water, a couple turns here and there, yada yada yada and you’ll reach a 5 way intersection of hops. Every choice looks familiar and well-traveled - Chinook, Centennial, Amarillo, Cascade, & Simcoe - but you can’t really go wrong with classic, seasoned options. At some point, pick up some yeast along the way at that place, and cruise on out with notes of prickly pine needles, grapefruit rind, tangerines and a dry finish with a brisk snap.
Wide Load
DIPA|8.5%|58 IBU
HONK HOOONK! This DIPA doesn’t like to share the road! Y’all better be ready to take the expressway to FLAVORTOWN with a procession of three Nelson Sauvin lots all lined up, plus a little Citra for overdrive. We used such a heavy hand that we’re going to have to cruise under the speed limit! Yield to large notes of passionfruit, gooseberry, lychee and a little bit of diesel fuel & burnt rubber for good measure (#lifeontheroad). And we’ll keep the hazards flashing because the ABV is a sneaky one. If you hammer down, be careful, or you’ll be riding the cradle! Ok, Bandit. We gotta bear rolling discos up ahead. Can we get a BIG 10-4?! Over and Out.
Jesus Take The Wheel IPA
IPA|6.9%|55 IBU
Umm, so...this is where we’re at right now. It’s been a long ride throughout this pandemic, and a couple months ago it felt *almost* normal but here we are, asking people to wear masks again and checking vaccination cards to keep the people inside our space as safe and healthy as possible. And while over 80% of Seattlites have gotten vaccinated (WHICH IS AWESOME), there’s still a portion of this country (who are traveling?! To HERE!? WHY.) that come up with some illogical/selfish/misinformed/conspiratorial/uneducated reasoning to not get the vaccine. [If you are one of those aforementioned people, and reading this rn, your money is probably better spent elsewhere, like at a business that shares your “beliefs”...] ANYWAYS it is almost like, maybe we should start to believe in God, or something? No no, that’s not where we’re going with this. But it’d be cool if SOMEBODY could take this virus from our hands and make it go away. We really want to let go. And let loose. And bring this delicious IPA brewed with Motueka, Citra, & Comet hops to a party, and not stress out about everything and just get lost in meaningful conversation while inhaling notes of mandarin oranges, meyer lemon, & lime leaf jumping out of the glass and laughing at a joke Dave made, because Dave is FUNNY and always there for us, and wait, maybe Dave can take the wheel?
One In Eight
Hoppy Summer Ale|5.2%|40 IBU
We started One in Eight FOUR harvests ago with CLS Farms. Shelley (who owns/runs the farm with her husband Eric) was battling a second round of breast cancer, which coincided with Steve’s mom undergoing radiation treatment for breast cancer at the same time. Since then, CLS Farms has run with this beer as an annual fundraiser for the Wellness House of Yakima, who provide housing, resources and services to women in need that are fighting cancer. This year Yakima Valley Hops and Skagit Valley Malt joined the effort as well - and we’re using a new hop variety - Idaho Gem! Over a blend of Skagit Valley Fritz Pale, Fritz Pils, & Munich malt, the end result is an easy drinking beer perfect for those long, hot summer nights.For this beer, we collab’d with Icicle Brewing out of Leavenworth (Founder Pam is also a survivor) and since everyone involved donated their time and ingredients, 100% OF ALL PROFITS MADE FROM THIS BEER will be donated to the Yakima Wellness House. FUCK CANCER!For more information, visit https://1in8.co/ and https://wellness-house.org
Splitting Hairs IPA
IPA|6.6%|50 IBU
To some, an IPA can be practically anything - like a beer with fruit and/or lactose and/or lactic acid and/or Kellogg’s fruit loops - so long as hops are in there somewhere. This beer is NOT referring to those types of “IPA”. This is more referring to the comparative minutiae between IPAs and Strong American Pales - which has quite the overlap in style guidelines. And we don’t want to bore you with all those specifications, but let’s just say this beer is firmly in the gray area. We added a splash of Simpsons Golden Naked Oats to the grain bill, and heavily hopped it with our favorite lots of Mosaic, Amarillo, Citra, Chinook. It’s fruit first, pine second, wisp of dankness with a perceptible bitterness and dry finish and ever so slightly lower abv that will have you not caring so much about styles...or weird phrases from the 15th century....HOW DO YOU EVEN SPLIT A HAIR? IT’S IMPOSSIBLE. FUCK IT!
I Just Saved Money On My Car Insurance
Pale|5.9%|45 IBU
Did you know - a hop combination of Mosaic, Strata, Galaxy, & Citra will result in a delightful expression of passion fruit, pineapple, and apricot? And, if brewed over a base of 2 row with a splash of wheat & naked oats, it will result in a smooth and soft mouthfeel? And, if using our house yeast, it will still result in a quenching, dry finish? You did? Well kudos to you. We were busy watching commercials during the entire brew, and sometimes it just works out.
Street Lights, People IPA
IPA|6.9%|55 IBU
This last month has been nutso! Restrictions lifted, 100% occupancy, everybody out and about, flying Delta, transmitting Delta, the WHO saying one thing, the CDC....HELLO?! CDC! WHERE YOU AT?! - packed bars, house parties, drunk karaoke...so to celebrate (?) we brewed a recipe with commingling base malts (2 row, Pilsner, & Maris Otter) and hopped this ditty with El Dorado, Vic Secret, & Citra. Initially, we felt like this may be an unlikely hop combination - like the smell of wine and cheap perfume - but nope! Tangerines, Apricot, and White Grapefruit go on and on and on and on. It’s just a nice reminder to not stop believing (in normalcy), and hold on to that feeling (of being safe & healthy) because cases are on the rise and shit is going to be weird. So walk on down that boulevard. We’ll meet you halfway.
Timbo
Dry-Hopped Pilsner|5.8%|50 IBU
This is not our beer. Yes - we brewed it, fermented it, hopped it, carbed it, packaged it, and tasted it. But all in accordance to our LA friends at Highland Park Beer - who won a GABF Gold Medal in 2019 for this exact recipe. Timbo has had a cult following from the get go - it’s intensely hoppy (mostly Mosaic, some Citra, some Hallertau Blanc, and a little Saphir), impeccably balanced, and dangerously crushable. This year, HPB is doing a Timbo week from 7/16-7/23 - and since their distro is mostly LA county, they asked a few of us to make it in our home markets. And so, here it is, in all its glory.
Entschuldigung!
Keller Munich Helles|5.2%|28 IBU
Dieses Bier ist ein traditionelles Helles-Rezept. JEDOCH, ist es auch ungefiltert und ungeschönt - was ihm ein trübes Aussehen und ein weicheres Mundgefühl verleiht. Viele Deutsche würden denken: “Das ist nicht richtig! Es ist nicht fertig! Ansonsten MUSS es kristallklar sein!“ Und zu ihnen sagen wir “Sorry!!“ Und wenn wir schon dabei sind: Regenschirm nicht vergessen! Und wir lieben Pfannkuchen!TL; NFIG - This deliciously soft & floral Helles is intentionally hazy - apologies to the traditionalists.
Old Man Yelling IPA
IPA|7.2%|68 IBU
CHINOOK IS A GREAT IPA HOP!
WHY IS THIS HAZY?!
IT NEEDS MORE MALT FLAVOR!
THIS BEER SHOULD BE MORE BITTER!
WHY DON’T YOU FILL GROWLERS?!
MICROBREWERIES ARE EVERYWHERE!
BIRTH RATES ARE AT AN ALL-TIME LOW!
IT USED TO BE SO EASY TO BUY A HOUSE!...GET OFF MY LAWN!
I DON’T HAVE ANY STUDENT LOAN DEBT!
NOBODY WORKS HARD ANYMORE!
SOCIALIZED MEDICINE IS COMMUNISM!...YES, I HAVE MEDICARE!
THIS DESCRIPTION IS DEVOLVING REAL FAST!
WE’LL SEE OURSELVES OUT…NOBODY HOLDS THE DOOR ANYMORE!
THIS BEER TASTES GREAT BY THE WAY!
Mistakes Were Made
Smoked Dark Lager|5.3%|32 IBU
When we think about lagers, in the general sense, what do we want?
We want something drinkable, sessionable if you will, with a lower abv. We want something clean, with subtle nuances and complexity, multiple layers of flavors slowly coming to light the more we sip it. And we want a snappy hop presence. And a SMOOTH mid palate. And A DRY FINISH! (Preach.) It’s gotta be CRISPY! (YES!) AND... AND GERMAN CHOCOLATE CAKE (Umm.) AND CARAMELIZED RAISINS (What.) CAMPFIRE SMOKE!!!!! (Please Stop.)
The resulting beer is all of the above - a unique, summertime lager that tastes dark but drinks light. Is it a mistake to release a smoke beer coming off one of the hottest weeks in history? Maybe..but we’re proud of it all the same! #noregrets
From The Brew Deck IPA
IPA|6.8%|65 IBU
Hello, this is your brewer speaking. This brew day will be roughly 7 hrs and 38 minutes. It should be pretty smooth, but keep your boots on in the event of light trubulence (get it?! TRUB!). Our team today consists of Mosaic and Amarillo in the front, along with Sabro and Citra in the main cabin. They will be at your service once we reach a rolling boil and are happy to assist all the way to dry hop. The flavors at your destination will be pineapple, tangelo, key lime, and mango with a local time of happy hour. Lastly, from the bottom of our pints, we’d like to thank you for drinking Cloudburst. We know you have other options when choosing your IPA, and we appreciate you drinking this one.
You’ve Got Pale!
Pale|5.9%|45 IBU
This idea for this beer was inspired by a box of beer. But not just any old box, filled with uninspiring or anonymous beers. This box contained world class hops brewed by our friends at Cellarmaker (SF), Highland Park (LA), Green Cheek (Orange) & Pinthouse (Austin) that was packed & shipped between our breweries throughout 2020. As one thing led to another, we thought it would be fun to brew a beer together. But not just any old beer - this one had to be magical. So we all started with a West Coast Hazy Pale recipe aka “Cellarmaker-Style Pale” base - keeping the malt bill, pH adjustments, & neutral fermentation profile the same between the 5 breweries. For hops - we limited ourselves to 3 total varieties each: 1 old school variety, 1 new school variety, and Citra. The old school & new school varieties were blindly drawn out of hat for each brewery, and could only be used by one of us. We ended up with Simcoe (old school) & Talus (new school), which resulted in big notes of rugby red grapefruit, tangerine, passion fruit & pine. The other versions of this beer will be out in local markets this week as well - so feel free to try and trade some beer, via your own beer box, to collect them all!
Relative Fiction
Brett Pils|5.0%|27 IBU
Our first beer out of our Shilshole location is here to set the tone of what the future beholds! In talking with our wild beer making friends, we found that starting with a basic intention for these beers was important. So, what is our intention? Well, to make approachable, simple beers in Stainless Steel that showcase Brettanomyces while remaining true to their core style. So for this beer, we started with a soft, floral leaning German Pilsner base that we co-fermented with Brett Brux & Brett Claus in addition to our German Lager yeast. Over the course of 6 months, we watched the subtleties and complexities from the Brett slowly present themselves - resulting in aromatics of overripe pineapple, barnyard, sweaty funk - but underneath it all, is still an easy drinking base beer you can keep coming back to.
Maximize Profits IPA
IPA|6.9%|53 IBU
If you know us, like REALLY know us, then you know we’re all about that bottom line. #CASHRULESEVERYTHINGAROUNDUS We eat, sleep, dream, live BUSINESS STUFF. How do we make money? Spend money. With efficiency. And then manipulate the market. While value adding. And thinking about synergy, alignment, and bandwidth to move the needle. Sometimes we take a deep dive, and then deep dive within a deep dive to go deeper diving. While constantly lowering our overhead and COGS but raising our OPEX, ROI, EBITDA retaining Motivation. Hunger. Thirst. Raising the Bar. Also - Forecast, Forecast, Forecast. Do another Forecast for core competency sake. And after all that, you keep producing widgets, like beer, and add three diversified portfolio lots of Nelson Sauvin hops from New Zealand while feathering in some Citra to tax harvest and we churn it out like diamond hands for you to enjoy because money never sleeps, and our IPAs don’t either.
Roll Credits
DIPA|8.2%|68 IBU
Cast, in order of appearance
Base Malt 1…….Rahr 2 Row
Base Malt 2……Weyermann Pilsner
Other Malt……. Weyermann Carafoam
Primary Hop……..Mosaic Pellets
Secondary Hop…….Citra Pellets
Other Hop…….Idaho 7 Pellets
Directed By
Steve & Zach
Produced By
Imperial Corporate A30 Yeast
Sound
Miley Cyrus
ROSALIA
Robyn
IDLES
Adapted Screenplay
Noah
Onboarding
Kira
Downstream Editing
Mosaic Cryo
Idaho 7 Cryo
Special Effects
Helget Gas
Packaging
Codi Canning Line
Packaging Ops
Leanne & Madi
Key Grips
Serena
Stace
Bryan
Collette
Matt
Dia
Mike
Christina
Special Assistant
Susan
Catering
Dump Truck
Refracted Light IPA
Be Proud
IPA|6.8%|55 IBU
Hey!It’s June! Which means it’s time to fly our beautiful big rainbow flag and celebrate PRIDE! (ps - it’s always time to do this, as well as advocate for our LQBTQIA+ community.) This year, we’ll be donating 10% of tasting room sales from this IPA to Gay City, a Cap Hill based, community driven organization that hosts a wide array of programs, services, & events - from free HIV testing & healthcare options, to fostering queer arts & culture, to supporting youth education. To help the spread the word about Gay City, we brewed a deliciously diverse IPA with Amarillo, Citra, Comet, Loral & Cascade hops. For more info, visit www.gaycity.org
Be Proud
Two For The Show
Three...is uh.....AND FOUR TO GO!
Pale|6.0%|40 IBU
They say that it’s one to get ready. And, sure, that makes sense. If getting ready isn’t the first thing you do before...whatever it is that you do, then you’ll probably have a tough start. But since this beer is already ready, we’d like to talk about the two hops in it - the “stars of the show,” if you will. GALAXY and SIMCOE. Both of these beauties can hold their own - but when their forces combine?! You get tropical highlights with citrusy & resinous undertones, which equals MONEY. Wait, it’s one for the money?! And THREE to get ready?! Well now, that makes no sense. Ok, um, time to GO!
Three...is uh.....AND FOUR TO GO!
Kouzlo
Traditional Czech Pilsner|5.4%|50 IBU
Kouzlo means charm. As in “third times the charm!” but that entire phrase in Czech is a helluva mouthful. Still, it’s significant because this is our third Czech Pils recipe we’ve brewed, tweaking it ever so slightly each time, on a never ending journey to flavor match the memory of drinking a fresh pour from Pivovar Matuska, while sitting in a beer garden in Prague. This time - we upped the bitterness and dried it out a little more. Per custom, we used Weyermann Floor Malted Bohemian Pils and hopped it with a bag of Saaz Special that Adam gave us, along with more regular Czech Saaz. Na zdraví! (pronounced: Naz-Drah-vee… it means “CHEERS!”... obviously.)
Stories From Now IPA
IPA|7.1%|65 IBU
You know how we always talk about stories of the past? Like last year, or like pre-pandemic, or like back in the day? We know - it’s fun to reminisce! But also, it’s important to make some fresh memories - like right now - because those stories were back then and this beer wasn't there for it. And we want you to remember this beer - in real time! We used Citra (duh), a relatable hop you have lots of positive memories of, along with Talus (Hop 692), a new hop you totally need more memories of. We also threw in a splash of Skagit White Wheat to round out all of those beautiful citrusy and tropical notes, dancing around, splashing in your mouth, laughing HAHA as the sun recedes from sight, and the beer realizes that this it’s last story ever because it’s about to be digested. Damn, that got dark...
Called To The Light
German-Style Pilsner|5.0%|45 IBU
As Dan Boeckner is one to say “...some ghosts sink, some get called to the light…”
And as ghosts, er brewers, we can totally relate - being drawn to the light beer that is PILSNER. Its origins, its designs, its techniques, its hopping rates, and its fermentation regiment and everything in between - we want to know more, we want to brew more, we want to drink more. In this iteration, we used a simple base of Weyermann Pilsner Malt, our house German lager strain (3470), and hopped it with a German blend Magnum, Tettnang, Saaz & Mittelfruh. “You know our hearts beat time out very slowly” he says. Ahh Pshyeahh...just like pilsners, Dan!
Wreck My Plans
Can Confirm - Plans Were Wrecked.
DIPA|8.5%|65 IBU
In a year (and a half) of ever changing plans, zero predictions, adjusted schedules, and projects placed on hold - are we finally getting back to *some* semblance of normalcy?! WE THINK MAYBE! This smooth & tropical DIPA will keep you on track with a blend of Citra, Mosaic, Comet, Cascade & a little blend of other experimentals. It’s a cautiously optimistic ode to responsible members of society! Unless you have too many, because you got excited seeing the vaccination numbers of Seattle humans make the push towards herd immunity. In that case, your plans that evening and/or morning after might have to be modified. But you get the gist!
Can Confirm - Plans Were Wrecked.
Watch Me Unravel IPA
IPA|7.0%|60 IBU
YEP! Another Cashmere driven beer which means….MORE WEEZER SWEATER SONG REFERENCES. While this beer is mostly Cashmere we sourced from two farms (Cornerstone Ranches and Gooding Farms), we sprinkled in some Nelson Sauvin from Freestyle Farms and Strata from Coleman Farms to really amplify those baselines of black currant, gooseberry, white grapefruit, and lilac. Woaha woaha woahhh. If you want to destroy this Cashmere (beer), hold these hops as we brew away. (After a long brew day) Lying on the floor-or, we’ve come undoooooooooone...again.
Gem Tones
Pale|5.9%|40 IBU
Ooo la la. A new-to-us hop variety! We first heard about Idaho Gem a couple years back, but we didn’t get to rub any until last harvest. At the time, it smelled pleasant enough that we snagged some. We used lots from Gooding Farm in Parma, Idaho & CLS Farms in Moxee, WA. Per usual, we cut it with a little Citra - but this beer is 80% Idaho Gem on the hot side, and 75% on the Dry Hop. So what’s it all about? We get bartlett pear, pink starburst, white grapefruit, green plantains & wintergreen. What do you think?
We're not going to tell your boss but time theft is a crime
Opalescent Tree Shark IPA
IPA|6.8%|68 IBU
Ok we’re just going to say it. We love Mosaic like Leslie Knope loves Ann Perkins. Mosaic hops are just so beautiful and organized. They are thoughtful and brilliant and sweet and innocent and pretty. They are a rainbow infused space miracle. A glowing Sun goddess. And a Poetic noble land mermaid. ALL IN ONE. And since we’re a rule breaking moth, we sprinkled in a little Chinook & Simcoe just to push this IPA a little more West Coast of Pawnee. The end result is a stupid hot bouquet of pineapple, ruby red grapefruit & purple urkle you’ll want before AND after eating waffles with whip cream & sprinkles.
Here For It IPA
IPA|6.6%|58 IBU
It’s been a while since we’ve talked to you about IPA. I mean, we release a new IPA almost every week, and we talk specifically about that one, but we don’t talk about (makes all encompassing hand motion) IPA. And we get A LOT of questions about IPA, ours specifically, in person, at both spots, all the livelong day.
Are they Hazy? Sure. Are they New England style? Not really. Are they West Coast? Kinda. Are they juicy? Often.
Our point is, as this style & segment grows, people (distributors, marketers, buyers, writers, drinkers. etc.) want to simply, easily, lazily put each IPA into a boring & rather binary box. And we’re here to say - STOP DOING THAT.
We’re happy to see the continued growth of IPAs! We are here for it! WE LOVE IPA. But IPAs can be a little bit of multiple sub-styles, on various spectrums, with several axes of dimensions. For example, ours generally have a hazy appearance with fruit & pine forward flavors, a ridgeline of bitterness throughout, subtle minerality in the mouthfeel and a snappy, dry finish. How do we classify this? Straightforwardly -- IPA.
This recipe was hopped mostly with Strata, plus some Simcoe & Citra for depth - with tasting notes of passion fruit, ruby red grapefruit, guava & pine.
Wise Child
ESB|6.3%|40 IBU
Welp, this here is a beer near and dear to our hearts, as well as to many a veteran of the Seattle beer scene. Why?! Because we FINALLY got to brew a beer with the old boss - Dick Cantwell, former Owner/Head Brewer of Elysian - who’s 5 year non-compete expired May of 2020, but a global pandemic pushed us back another year. Fittingly, we brewed a modernized version of a Cap Hill old faithful and one of the most decorated beers in their once independent portfolio - The Wise ESB. The Wise was a complex, malt forward Americanized ESB in all it’s late ‘90s - early ‘10s glory. In this iteration, we kept that integrity by layering 2 Row, Maris Otter, Munich, Crystal T-50, and Special W malts - an incredibly similar base to the original. But the twist here is a modernized “C” hop bill of Cashmere, Comet, & Citra - which replaced what was once Centennial, Chinook, & Cascade. The end result is a beer name was going to be called many better names, but Dick wanted to call it “It’s A Wise Child,” named after some literary JD Salinger deep cut that only Dick & two other older people reading this would know about..so we condensed it, because this beer is truly a child of The Wise.
A Whole New World
DIPA
DIPA|8.0%|60 IBU
This didn’t intend to be a beer for Ariel. But like, we used Galaxy hops, which is named after space, and space is out of this world, and thus, a whole new world, which is what OUR world is to the Little Mermaid, because she lives in a different world, under the sea, take it from me. We also used oats, and oats are a grain, often found in cereal, cereal is for grown ups, a select few of whom go into SPACE. In conclusion, space is oats and time is galaxy and mosaic plus citra are on a fourth axis of eternalastic dimension that could all be unleashed from the voicebox of a mermaid, so long as no spell has been cast by an angry octopus with superpowers. Enjoy!
That’s Baseball Baby
Gimme teh hotdog!
Pale|5.9%|45 IBU
Game on! When making a sessionable pale ale, you gotta go at least 3 for 10 with the hops. We got all the numbers, so we went heavy on the Azacca, and then used Citra and El Dorado too. With notes of Pineapple, Grapefruit, & Rainier Cherries and a lower ABV, have a few (just not 64) and rope a line drive out of nowhere! What do now?
Gimme teh hotdog!
Cut For Time IPA
IPA|7%|65 IBU
This IPA goes out to our bestest friend (unbeknownst to him) - Kyle Mooney. Kyle is super funny, and talented, and kinda good looking(?) - but week after week, his digital content on SNL gets cut for time and bumped off the show, only to live a quieter life in the corners of the interwebs. NOT COOL, LORNE. NOT COOL. But we were thinking, Amarillo is basically the Kyle Mooney of hops. It’s versatile, and fruity, and bold...but it’s just not as FIRE EMOJI as Strata, and Mosaic, and Citra, and Simcoe - despite it being the buzzy IPA hop before them. And sure, the variety was bungled in the early ‘10s - it’s acreage was expanded too fast, and often it was picked too late, and brewers started moving away from it and using newer, brighter, more reliable hop varieties. But then something happened…it started getting GOOD again. Talk about a rebound! SWISH! Of late, we’ve been stoked on some lots from Roy Farms and Crosby Hop Farm, and this beer includes two lots from the latter. It also includes some Amarillo Hash - a high oil/lupulin product - for an extra ZIP. The end result are big notes of pineapple & tangerine, with a kiss of Sativa in the finish for those that like HEADY DANK NUGZ. So yeah, this beer goes out to all the work and all the hops that show up to play and often get overlooked. To all the dreamers, and to all the teachers, and to all the…(insert Oscar Orchestra Music here)Amarillo Hash + Pellets, Mosaic, Citra, Simcoe Cryo
The Ultimate Rush IPA
IPA|6.7%|54 IBU
When you watch Point Break like a bazillion times, weird pieces of the script get buried in the nether regions of your brain and just kinda stick with you, ready to spring from your memory at the slightest inclination. Like, when you’re designing an IPA recipe around New Zealand Waimea hops. We had an untouched box of them in the cooler, so we just paddled in and went for it. Total Commitment. Er, virtually complete commitment. Because we used some Citra on the hot side. And then added some Mosaic Cryo on the dry hop. BUT WAIMEA IS THERE, EVERYWHERE, FULLY TORQUED, SWOLLEN ROLLIN’ RIDIN’ VIBIN’ BRUHHHH. Ok, that’s not from the movie. But it could've been. Just call timeout and ride this wave of rainier cherries, apricots, & white grapefruit over an easy break and dry finish.
Life’s Finer Moments
Coffee Porter|6.0%|37 IBU
Ahh, hello again old friend. You had a long day and a restless night, every day, forever, since we last brewed this beer. This morning, an indulgence is in order. Awaken the senses with a rich, smooth, dark and distinctive cup of brew. This robust porter, conditioned on house made cold brew with Lighthouse Roasters beans, is good to the last drop. Savor it, cherish it, sip by sip. Oh, the luxury. This is a promise, to you, in every cup. What kind of promise? I don’t know, stop asking questions in the middle of our quiet, generic coffee (beer) monologue...what the fuck. Where were we...mmm…coffee...beer...
Way Way Back
Further...
Pre-Prohibition American Pilsner|5.2%|40 IBU
Back in the day, like way way back, like before prohibition, young Americans, mostly from Europe (aka IMMIGRANTS) made lager beer here. What did they taste like? Well, honestly, they were probably pretty bad. Maybe ok. Rustic is a good word. Who really knows - they didn’t have Untappd back then! (#burn) And that’s not to knock them or their contribution to history. Just, a lot has evolved and improved since then - from raw material farming to malting to sanitation practices to hop pelletization to packaging….basically, everything. And NO, there was no corn used. What do you think this is, Whiskey?! While some brewers used corn back then, it didn’t proliferate American lager beer until the 70s when everybody wanted water flavored beer. Anyways, we digress. We built a lager recipe from some old articles and style guidelines - which means, we used a fantastic and flavorful blend of Weyermann Floor Malted Bohemian Pilsner and Thomas Fawcett Maris Otter malts. And then we fortified it with some old school noble & american hop varieties - namely, Saaz, Mt. Hood, & Willamette. At the end of the day, this beer is bready- balanced meets snappy-crisp with a pleasant floral hop presence throughout that will leave you nostalgic for something your hipster great grandpa drank.
Further...
Almost There IPA
IPA|6.8%|50 IBU
You guys we’re almost there. As of the morning of April 5th, 40% of King County residents have had their first vaccine shot. We’re on pace for 50% by the end of the week. EXCITING STUFF. BUT, we’re not there yet. Cases are rising here, there, pretty much everywhere and we have to remain diligent with mask wearing and safe distancing and washing our hands! It’s encouraging and exciting, but still requires attention and patience. Much like Experimental Hop HBC 586. This hop is primed to be the next BIG DEAL - it’s future is bright, but it will need a few more harvests to gain critical mass. This baby has notes of guava, papaya, candied pineapple, & cherries - essentially, it’s an intense tropical fruit cup of emotions. For support, we threw in a little Mosaic & Citra, and feathered in some Skagit White Wheat and Oats to soften the malt. The end result is a perfect companion to help you hang in there! We’re so CLOSE!
Cold Activated
Cool Fermented Pale|5.5%|50 IBU
How cool is this pale? Very cool. Like since day 1 it’s practically been cold. And it’s active too. Or, it was active. It’s still cold though! And if you can’t tell by the taste of it or the touch of it, you can just LOOK at it and SEE the coldness. And if you stare really hard, you see the citrusyness as well. This thing looks, tastes and smells like an entire crate of citrus - peel, flesh, pulp, and dusty pine - because we used a blend of Citra, Mandarina, Cascade, Citra Cryo & Ekuanot Cryo. When the mountain’s out, you know what we’re about. Oh, you don’t? Well, we’re about crushing cool fermented pale ales, for one thing.
Out of Pocket
DIPA|8.2%|68 IBU
You might’ve had this DIPA before, from a few years back, but unless you produce receipts, might as well make a new assessment. This beer is a direct outlay of Simcoe, Mosaic, and Idaho 7 hops that may or may not reimburse your pallet. Notes of grapefruit pith, pineapple flesh, and wispy dankness may cover expenses accrued over a long period of time incurred on your behalf, but only after a formal review. If it’s determined that you’ve expended personal resources, unexpected or unfair, at the end of this enterprise, please direct hazy inquiries to our accounting department re: what the fuck we’re talking about. Or not. In fact, don’t even think about deducting this.
This Is Boring
Bored To Death.
American Imperial Stout|9.3%|80 IBU
American Imperial Stout2021 WABA Gold Medal From the brewers that brought you “Not Interested”, “Bored To Death”, “Not My Favorite”, & “Yawn,” we proudly present you this straightforward American Style Imperial Stout. That’s it. Like, there’s nothing else added to this beer. No vanilla, coffee, cocoa nibs, peanut butter, maple syrup, lactose, coconut, fruit puree, cinnamon, marshmallow, other spices, baked goods, hot sauce, jerky or placentas. ALSO - this beer was NOT barrel aged. It’s just…a beer. A beer we put a lot of thought into because it’s a beer we actually crave. A beer that honors those that came before it - like Old Rasputin, Ten Fidy, Yeti & Narwhal. A full bodied beer with a roast forward blend of 11 malts. A beer heavily hopped with Chinook, Centennial, Simcoe, Amarillo, & Cascade to cut that roast with undertones of citrus, dark fruit & pine. A beer the children won’t understand right now, but will look back on it 5 years later, and say “Ah. I get it now.” and wish they ordered it then, because we probably haven’t brewed it since.
Bored To Death.
Freestyle Battle IPA
IPA|6.9%|58 IBU
Yo Pat! New Zealand’s got something to say! If we’re being honest, a few years back, we had kinda written off the Cascade variety. It was like Forrest Gump’s box of chocolates, but in the worst way - yes, bc it is NOT chocolate but also - you just never knew what you were going to get. That is, until we tried a box of Cascade grown in New Zealand at Freestyle Farms. The terroir, combined with heightened attention to picking windows, brought us a bright Cascade with notes of lime flesh, spruce, blood orange and fragrant wildflowers we pictured growing on the hillside of Nelson.So - here you go. Same malt bill, same hop bill, just New Zealand Cascade from Freestyle Farms in place of Pat’s. ~~~70% Freestyle Farms NZ Cascade15% Simcoe Cryo15% Citra Cryo
Pat Vs. The World IPA
IPA|6.9%|58 IBU
Who is Pat Smith? Pat Smith is a complex, multi-faceted human, just like all of us. But there is one realm that Pat Smith is NOT like us - GROWING HOPS. Year in and year out, Pat’s hops are of the highest quality this world has ever seen - from picking to kilning to baling, and that translates all the way through to the beer in your mouth. In the crop year of 2019, Pat won the Cascade Cup with his hops from Tributary Farms. That’s the granddaddy of them all! And we were there! We rubbed it with our own hands and smelled it with our own noses that very day. And let me tell you, this cascade is on a WHOLE ‘NOTHER LEVEL. We had to beg, borrow, prod, whine, & threaten (hollowly) just to get a couple boxes of them...and we regret nothing.~~~70% Tributary Farms Cascade15% Simcoe Cryo15% Citra Cryo
Change Of Plans
Pale|6.0%|58 IBU
I mean, the plan WAS to brew a west coasty pale ale with a public Hop Research Council experimental hop variety. It’s just, we were expecting to use a different one...that didn’t get delivered in time. And believe us, we TRIED to wait for FedEx to deliver it. We kept pushing it further down the hop bill. In the boil, we ended up some Chinook, and some Cascade, and then some Citra…but when the whirlpool filled up, we used W1121-059 from the Washington State University program, which was in our cooler all along, just patiently waiting for us to get into it. And we’re happy for it! Overall, this beer has notes of meyer lemon, orange marmalade, & fresh pine needles upon a slightly more old school malt bill of 2 row and Maris Otter.
Cool Your Jets IPA
THEY ARE COOL OK JEEZ!
IPA|7%|60 IBU
It has recently come to our attention that this 2020 lot of New Zealand Nelson Sauvin hops from Freestyle Farms is AMAZING. We have no idea how we lucked out - perhaps it had something to do with Crosby selecting them for us. Anyways, when we found out how awesome they were, we were all like "Um. Hi. We just got that box of Nelson in and... DO YOU KNOW HOW UNREAL THESE ARE?! WHAT THE WHAT?!? HOW MANY BOXES DO WE HAVE OF THESE ON CONTRACT?! WOW. THAT MANY?! ARE YOU SURE?! OK. YES. SEND THEM ALL TO US. YES. ALL THE BOXES. OUR ENTIRE ALLOTMENT. NO, NO, THANK YOU! OKAY!!" and Crosby were all like "Dudes. Cal - Calm down. Take it easy. Are you breathing? shhh. Take a deep breath and use your quiet voices. Chill please. STOP. COOL YOUR JETS. JESUS. What have we done." And then afterwards we were all like, "let’s make an IPA with Pilsner and 2 Row base malt and hop it with mostly Nelson Sauvin, plus a little Citra & Mosaic."So we did.
THEY ARE COOL OK JEEZ!
Tempo Rubato
Lager Beer|5%|35 IBU
What is an Italian Pilsner? That is the question. Well, it’s basically a dry-hopped German Pilsner with a little more wiggle room to play with other, slightly less traditional European hop varieties. Thus, a freedom of expression with style and hops, allowing us to follow our passions and intuitions and whims. So come along for the ride - there’s classic Saaz at the start, Saphir speeds it up, Hallertau Blanc for a twist, and traditional Tettnang to bring it all back. A few sips in, and it’s like you’re stealing time.
Seems Plausible
DIPA|8.2%|60 IBU
...so what you’re telling us is, we’re living on a flat earth, in a new world order deep state run by George Soros and the Illuminati. A world with reptillian overlords, Hollywood canibals & pedophiles, where past and current genocide may or may not have existed BUT Finland AND dinosaurs definitely DO/DID NOT EXIST. But wait, ALSO Elvis is still alive, Avril Lavigne is not, Prince Charles is a vampire, Beyonce was never pregnant, and Bill Gates is microchipping EVERYBODY via 5G. And to top it all off, Global Warming is a hoax, and Aliens built all the things back in the day? Ok, OKAY. That’s a whole lotta thoughts right there, and we need time to process. So, we’re going to sip on this beer loaded with Mosaic, Motueka, NZ Cascade, & Sabro Cryo and bide our time figuring out how to slowly back away from this conversation without causing suspicion that we, ugh, how to do we put this politely...agree to disagree.
Is This It
That was it.
Pale|6%|50 IBU
A not so hard-to-explain malt bill of Rahr 2 Row, Weyermann Carafoam and a touch of Simpsons Crystal Light sets the stage for a catchy (but still rough around the edges) hop combo of Azacca, Mosaic, and Idaho 7 in this modern age hazy meets west coast pale ale. Notes of strawberry, pineapple, passion fruit, and tangerine strike a cagey melody that finishes with a refreshing citrus snap will have you trying your luck. Some people they don’t understand, but we’re not wasting no more time - just take it or leave it!
That was it.
Crushin’ Sandos IPA
IPA|6.4%|48 IBU
How areya now? Good an you? Oh notsobad. We’ll get to the point. We went all oot on this sniper of a hazy. It’s filled with nutritious grains from upcountry - oats, white wheat, & red wheat - upon a base of trusty barley. But, we took it down about 5-10% to make it easy peezy. To be fair, we hopped it with Huell Melon, Citra, and wee bit of Sabro, displaying notes of passion fruit, honeydew, kiwi & lime pith. Can confirm - the end result is something you can drink all day while skipping leg day, chorin’, preachin’ and/or causing mayhem. You know what they say - if you do what you love, you never work a day in your life. That’s a Texas-sized 10-4. Bonnie McMurray?! OK, pitter patter.
Jerk Store IPA
They called, and we ran out of it.
IPA|7.1%|60 IBU
Sometimes in life, the gods smile upon you. You get the hop bill just right - a classic meets current Northwest IPA profile thanks to Simcoe, Citra and Centennial hops. You’re not looking for another beer. Jerk store is the beer. It’s a smart beer for a smart crowd and we’re not gonna dumb it down. So when Yakima calls, and wants their hops back, you’ll know what comeback to say… just tell them you had sex with their wife! ZING!
They called, and we ran out of it.
When You Leave The Oven On
Smoked Porter|5.8%|32 IBU
Sometimes, when you leave the oven on, after baking chocolate chip cookies, you have a valid excuse. Like, you get distracted because you fixate on something, and find yourself down a rabbit hole, as the room fills with aromas of equal parts campfire smoke and milk chocolate. Maybe, you’re trying to find a local bottle shop that has Alaskan Smoked Porter in stock, a beer you feel like you see allover the place when you aren’t in the mood, but then when you are in the mood, it’s NOWHERE TO BE FOUND SO YOU HAVE TO BREW YOUR OWN VERSION BECAUSE WTF ALASKA IT’S WINTER AND THIS BEER SHOULD BE EVERYWHERE. Welp, your shortage is our gain. We just cornered the market. You snooze, you lose. You don’t smoke, you go broke. Anyways, what were we in the middle of?! OH SHIT!
Illusion Delusion IPA
IPA|6.6%|65 IBU
Surprise! We had a box of Australian Enigma hops left on an old contract, so obviously we had to use them fast like woah. When one brews with Enigma, you find yourself down a wormhole of riddles, and puzzles, and 90s ambient techno soft-pop music. At some point during this daydream, we started thinking about Magic Eye pictures, and how bullshit those things were! Like, did anybody ACTUALLY ever see those supposed hidden images? WE THINK NOT. It had to be one of the greatest ruses of the 90s - “Yeah, um, just stare at this colorful pattern until you go crosseyed and start to hyperventilate and we swear, you’re going to see an image of a….horse. No, a cat. An animal. You WILL see an animal. It’s there. Oh, you can’t see it? Well maybe go buy our newest book. You’ll see something in that one for sure.” ANYWAYS...this beer, it’s got Enigma, plus a little Mosaic & Citra. You will taste pineapple, papaya, guava and nectarine - those flavors are in there. If you don’t taste them, just buy another one. You will taste them in the next one. Promise.
Big Schmidge
DIPA|8%|55 IBU
We took a step back and simplified this juicy ding dong. We kept the malt bill basic - Rahr 2 Row & Pilsner - and added one adjunct - Oat Malt. Then, we went all in with everybody’s favorite hop - CITRA. But wait, there’s more! While Citra is our favorite hop, it’s often quite soft and rounded. Sometimes, we think it needs a little bite with help from a sharper hop that’ll brighten it’s profile. Thus, we sprinkled in a tiny amount of Idaho 7 - to the tune of 12% of the entire hop bill. AND GUESS THE FUCK WHAT - IT WORKED! This is still a Citra beer, through and through - but those notes of tangerine, apricot, yellow peach, and ruby red grapefruit have a little more zing to them. You know what they say - sometimes you just need a schmidge to really go big. People say that. We swear.
It’s 630 Somewhere IPA
IPA|6.5%|60 IBU
This beer is as good of an excuse as any to try out Experimental Hop 630, are we right? We’ve played around with it for a few years, and it’s flavors have resembled clementines, bing cherries & bartlett pears - so we sprinkled in some Mosaic & Simcoe to round out/brighten up the fruitiness. This experimental hop is on the cusp of getting named, which means it’s gaining traction, and will soon be expanding to more fields, and breweries, and fans in the near future. So that, technically, somebody could be drinking a Hop 630 beer, every hour, every day, all over the world.
If When Now Not
Pale|5.8%|45 IBU
We’ve been staring at this box of Styrian Wolf hops for what feels like forever. We’ve heard good things, friends have used the variety….we just...I don’t know, get distracted? So we thought: If we aren’t going to use these now, then when will we ever? If now is not when, when is now not when? Guess what?! Right now is when! Make sense? Just like the previous sentences, this hop profile is confusing, but agreeable. Simcoe & Citra brighten up some fruity notes - tangerine, grapefruit, raspberry - along with a touch of tropical/woodiness from the Wolf. Enjoy now! No ifs or when!
Cosmic Lust IPA
That Lust was for you.
IPA|7.8%|60 IBU
Oh, what Dusty once was. He was vibrant! He was juicy! He was rough around the edges, with a little bite, and yet still balanced and approachable. Everybody loved him, and even more do today. Sure, he still looks the same - but his old friends know that he's changed. He's bigger now, a little less interesting - dull and dumbed down. He says money and opportunity haven't changed him....Ok. But to those who remember what once was, this Lust's for you. ~ ~ ~Chinook, Citra, Amarillo and Galaxy.7.8% ABV, 60 IBUS and brewed in Seattle by an adamantly small, forever independent brewery that former Elysian employees work at.
That Lust was for you.
One in Eight
American Wheat Ale|5.4%|35 IBU
We started One in Eight three harvests ago with CLS Farms. Shelley (who owns/runs the farm with her husband Eric) was battling a second round of breast cancer, which coincided with Steve’s mom undergoing radiation treatment for breast cancer at the same time. Since then, CLS Farms has run with this beer as an annual fundraiser for the Wellness House of Yakima, who provide housing, resources and services to women in need that are fighting cancer. This year Yakima Valley Hops and Roy Farms joined the effort as well - and 2020 Triumph hops were made available to any brewery that wanted to help the cause.This time around, we brewed a wheat ale with malt from Skagit Valley and hopped it with Triumph, in addition to a little Chinook & Citra. The end result is a medium-bodied, fruit forward, thirst quenching beer that goes down easy any time of day or season. As in year’s past, 10% of our tasting room sales of this beer will go to the Yakima Wellness House.For more information, visit https://1in8.co/ and https://wellness-house.org
Not Interested
Oh, now you're interested?!
Dark Stuff|5.6%|25 IBU
Hey. Hi. Over here. We’d like to tell you all about this excitingbrandNEW BROWN ALE. Yes, like brown in color. No, we didn’t use any adjuncts. I mean, we did use some Golden Naked Oats - so if you like, you can call it an oatmeal brown ale. But mostly we used a plethora of other kilned, caramelized and roasted malts. And some amazing hops from across the pond - German Northern Brewer and UK Fuggles. THESE HOPS ARE THE BEST. And this beer isn’t even about them! This beer is about tantalizing notes of chocolate (No, there is no chocolate in it), bread crust (we didn’t use bread either), cereal sweetness (NO. STOP ASKING US. there is no boxed cereal in this), and dark caramel (SERIOUSLY?! WE USED NO CANDY WTF)….WAIT. Why are you walking away? Is this not something you’re into? Not even a little bit? Fine. More for us then.
Oh, now you're interested?!
Party For One IPA
Back on my beat.
IPA|6.8%|60 IBU
We usually throw a pretty big party for our Anniversary. But this year is different. It’s more of a party for one - you can put on sweats, pour a can of this IPA into your favorite glass, sink into the couch, and put Carly Rae on the speaker…This party in a can has all the makings of a typical Cloudburst IPA - 2row and Pils malt for the base, combined with some of our favorite hops - Mosaic. Strata. Galaxy. Citra. Here’s to 5 years of brewing small batch, independent craft beer for our Seattle friends! We’ll see you next year at the party, but probably won’t remember it...because...drunk.
Back on my beat.
I Award You No Points Triple IPA
And may God have Mercy on your soul.
TIPA|9.5%|72 IBU
What we’ve just brewed - again - is one of the most insanely idiotic things we have ever tasted. At no point in our rambling, incoherent hop additions were we even close to anything considered a rational rate. Everyone in this room is now dumber having tasted it. Yakima Chief Ranches, we’ve got a feeling your whole family of Mosaic, Citra, Simcoe, Talus & Sabro is going down our throats. But right now, we have to smell it. Well, here goes nothing. NO YELLING ON THE BUS.
And may God have Mercy on your soul.
Old Flame IPA
Just Another Ex-old School Seattle IPA
IPA|7.3%|65 IBU
You guys! This was the SECOND beer we EVER made at Cloudburst - filling a virgin, empty tank on November 6, 2015. And for our 5 YEAR ANNIVERSARY, we wanted to bring it back, in all it’s outdated glory (ok, we modernized it a titch). Our previous description of this beer was pretty straightforward so we wanted to use this opportunity to elaborate on this beer - why it means so much to us and so much to Seattle craft beer - so gather round, youths. It’s story time! A version of “this” IPA has existed since ~1989, in the vein of Scarlet Fire IPA - brewed at Big Time Brewing (who is still going strong, btw!). To us, there is no truer NW IPA. This is where the style is born. In 1998, that beer even won a GABF medal in the IPA category (some of you reading this weren’t even born then). The brewers that came through Big Time Brewing (& Pike Brewing, & Hale’s at that) - Ed Tringali, Jason Parker, Fal Allen, Larry Rock, Bill Jenkins, Kevin Forhan, Dick Cantwell, among others - are fucking legends that we all owe a debt of gratitude towards. When those brewers moved outward and upward, they’d take that evolving Scarlet Fire recipe with them, continue to tweak it, and call it their own. Hence, Elysian’s Prometheus IPA was born when Dick opened up shop - which was an IPA that both Steve and Zach enjoyed drinking and brewing in the early ‘10s. Thus was the reasoning, back in 2015, when Steve broke up with the brewery formerly independently operating as Elysian, that he felt it was his responsibility to carry the torch and keep the spirit and soul of “this” IPA burning. Old Flame was born. And we hope someday, future Seattle breweries that don’t even exist yet steal this fire and pass it on. We all exist because of this spark. And that’s the tale. So, what is “this” version all about? Well, it has not one but TWO types of CRYSTAL MALT in it, along with some Munich malt as well. So yeah, there is a fucking malt presence in this hoppy ding dong. And it’s hopped with Chinook, Centennial, Cascade, Amarillo, and Citra cryo (we said we could tweak it, ok?!). Still, there’s PINE. Resin. Grapefruit. Citrus Peel. Leather & breadcrust. And yes, this a modern take - we used brewing salts, and pH adjustments, and it’s not nearly as bitter as it could (should?) be and it has a dry hop rate of 3#/bbl - an ungodly amount in the early 90s. But the soul and intention is there, and that is what counts. We hope you enjoy it for what it is. It’s been here for 31 years. And we hope it’s around for that many years to come. Thank you for reading our TED talk.
Just Another Ex-old School Seattle IPA
Yakima Freeze
Wet Hop IPA|6.4%|50 IBU
Frozen Wet Hops? FROZEN WET HOPS. That’s what’s in this beer. Like, they picked the hops and instead of conveying them to the kiln….they conveyed them to a flash freezer and sent them to a cold storage unit. And then, 3 months later, they showed up at our brewery….at -10 degrees. And we brewed with them the same we do with “regular” fresh wet hops. Technology, my dudes. It’s pretty fucking cool. ! ! ! ! !14#/bbl of Flash Frozen Wet Citra & Wet Simcoe from Wyckoff Farms.
To Whom It May Concern IPA
With Sincere Regrets
IPA|7.2%|60 IBU
We cordially summon you to imbibe this gracious repercussion of saccharomyces cerevisiae fermentation. Not to obfuscate the plethora of hops that coalesce, this libation bonds an amalgam of Citra, Idaho 7, and Sabro of the humulus lupulus genus species. In conjunction with its proficiencies and empirical distinctions, attributes of Prunus Persica, Oro Blanco, Limettioides, and Cedrus Libani emanate. We express our gratitude to you for perusal of this superfluous chronicle and wish you enjoy this potation.
Warmest Regards,
Cloudburst Brewing
With Sincere Regrets
Play For Keeps
Lager Beer|5.6%|32 IBU
We’ve been wanting to brew a Vienna forever. But the timing never really worked out. And then we had to perseverate over the malt bill. And agonize over the hop schedule. And we started getting in our own heads about it, because we CARED SO MUCH. It had to be just right and toasty and breadcrusty and caramelly and spicy but still dry and snappy. When push came to shove, we came up with a blend of Vienna, Munich, Caramunich malts (all from Weyermann) and hopped it with Magnum, Tettnang, Saaz hops and this is where we are right now. We don’t always brew lager, but when we do, we play for keeps. Whatever that means. You get the grist.
Holidazical IPA
IPA|6.9%|60 IBU
If we’re being honest here, we’ve been having a hard time even knowing what day it is. Like, it’s already halfway through December and we had no idea. It feels like it’s been this way forever and time is becoming a flat circle. But since somebody picked their head up and realized we all HAVE A DAY OFF (!?) next week, we felt it was time to release a “Winter” IPA. What is a “Winter” IPA? Well, that’s a great question… It’s an IPA, we know that. And drank during Winter, because of course. And maybe a little more piney than usual? Maybe? We don’t know. Anyways, this IPA has Chinook, Simcoe, Comet & Cashmere hops layered throughout the process. Whether your holidays are magical or lackadaisical, we hope you stay in sweatpants, never leave your home, eat delicious food, zoom your friends and family, and enjoy this beer - whether it’s 10am or 10pm...
All The Stops
DIPA|8.2%|63 IBU
Ok. That’s it. We’re bringing out the best of the best for this one. Mosaic & Strata to set the tone, layered throughout the boil along with a splash of Talus to brighten it all up - like a splash of key lime over a tropical fruit salad. This beer - with these killer hops, combined with a long fermentation for imperceptible alcohol and low esters, AND our patented dry finish with a kiss of quenching bitterness, is pretty darn close to the best DIPA we can muster. Is this description kinda boring for our standards? Sure is. But this beer is not, because we PULLED. OUT. ALL. THE. STOPS.
Hladinka
Lager Beer|5.6%|40 IBU
Look, we have a Czech friend named Adam. He’s actually a second generation brewer, and his family brewery is located in the countryside 30 miles outside of Prague. And we think he makes the best Czech pilsner in the world. And he told us to name our beer this word. How do you pronounce it? You can’t. It’s that awesome of a word. (Ok, you can: Ha-La-Dinka) And what does this word mean? Well, there’s no clear translation in English. But most closely, it’s “the perfect pour” - level headed with three fingers of wet foam. It’s a combination of something physical, combined with an experience, and a vibe. It’s deep, people. And so is this beer. We used Weyermann Floor Malted Bohemian Pils and hopped it with a bag of Saaz Special that Adam gave us, along with more regular Czech Saaz that Hollingbery sold us (we think those hops are special too). So don’t worry about butchering the name, it’s all downhill once it hits your lips. Er, uphill. It gets easier, is what we’re saying.
Na zdraví! (pronounced: Naz-Drah-vee… it means “CHEERS!”... obviously.)
Children of the Haze IPA
IPA|6.5%|50 IBU
Hi Kids. Do you like the hazies hazebombs dot com AF? Cool. Us too. That’s what this is all about, no doubt, big clout. It’s got like, every single low color malt and adjunct in it, because YOLO FRODO HELLO MOTO! We’re talking 2 Row, Pilsner, White Wheat, Red Wheat, Oat malt, Flaked Oats, Flaked Barley...yeah, we know - ‘cares? Heard Nerd. WHAT ABOUT DAT HOPSCRILLA GREENERY?!?!?! WE GOTCHU B! This potable liquid is crammed full of CITRA AND MOSAIC and cascade ALL THE WAY UP YOUR BUTTHOLE. You’re gonna love it, you’re gonna live it, it’s your best life, right here, right now, but be bubble wrap because there’s a pandemic going on in the outside world and you don’t need THAT but you do need THIS lit bit cloudy shit. ggnorekthxbai!
Look out! This is a trap.
Showing Up
Pale|5.9%|40 IBU
What is Showing Up? Well, it’s lots of things, when you think about it. The most obvious thing is that it’s a delicious pale ale - maybe one of our best pales ever?! - evenly and equally hopped with Citra and Nelson Sauvin, overflowing with notes of peaches and passionfruit in a crushable format. But, it’s also a mantra. At Cloudburst, we like to put our (beer) money where our mouths are. Even when times are tight, and will probably get worse. So, Showing Up is also a fundraiser - we’re donating 10% of sales to Stacey Abram’s Fair Fight Organization. Fair Fight advocates for free and fair elections, strengthening our democracy by creating an even playing field. In Georgia, it helped with fighting legislation and registering hundreds of thousands of new voters that previously felt disenfranchised… so that those often felt unheard... wait for it… could Show Up.
Married in my Mind IPA
IPA|6.8%|58 IBU
El Dorado and Citra - these two hops, they just GO together. El Dorado has this reliably floral fruity thing going on - yellow plums, pears, apricot, rose petals, beach grass - and when Citra shows up, it brightens the union by adding a citrusy bursts of tangerines and yellow peach. They are like a fuzzy/blurry yin and yang….like a poorly drawn venn diagram drawn by a three year old...like those bird species that fall in love and keep the same mate for their entire existence...how crazy is that, btw? That’s some miraculous fucking nature shit right there. Just think about that for a moment….
Loose Ends
Lager Beer|6.5%
"Loose Ends is a Collaboration brewed in Bend, OR with Cloudburst Brewing of Seattle, WA. This India Pale Lager has floral and perfume aromas derived from Citra, Sultana, and Nelson Sauvin hops. A very clean lager with a crisp finish makes this beer shine." - words by Boneyard Beer.
"These are 6-packs of 12 ounce cans (and on draft in Shilshole)" - words by Cloudburst Brewing.
Keys. Phone. Wallet. Mask.
DIPA|8.5%|65 IBU
First DIPA: Keys? Yep in my front right pocket. Phone? Left front pocket. Wallet - always back right pocket. MASK! This is life now. Wow, this Citra and Ekuanot Cryo and Mosaic combo is complex!
Second DIPA: Keys, on the counter. Phone on the coffee table. Wallet on the desk. Mask, off with you! Mmm, this beer goes down super easy.
Third DIPA: Keys - fuck where are my keys? I put them on the counter and then James needed to get his shit out of my car - James, where the fuck are my keys!?! - And where’s my goddamn wallet? I literally just HAD my wallet. To buy that thing. Also, can you call my phone?? Why am I always losing my phone? [Pounds beer, spills some on mask].
Fourth DIPA: SOMEBODYshouldinventabeeperclickerthingthatbeepswhenyouPUSHitsoyoucanfindyourshit becausethisSUCKSIhatethisshitandsoannnoying [Leaves glass 2/3rds full on top of phone, next to keys, wallet in plain sight, mask dangling from ear].
Totally Oatally
Totes All Gone.
Dark Stuff|5.1%|30 IBU
Back by popular demand from the people that work in the brewery! This time around, this beer is most definitely an oatmeal stout, with THREE types of oats making up a solid proportion of the grist! Big notes of milk chocolate and toffee, with a smooth, silky body; a sweet cereal mid-palate; and lingering roasty finish. It’s never tragic, mildly nutritious, totally classic, oatally delicious! (Fuck, we need to copyright that line ASAP.)
Totes All Gone.
The Other Four Seasons IPA
IPA|7.0%|63 IBU
You are cordially invited to consume this beer at the Four Seasons. You know the place, the one between the dildo shop and the crematory? In that industrial area on the outskirts of town? It provides lodging...er, logging. Logging, maybe. Definitely pruning. And mulch. And fertilizer! They have literally TONS of SHIT there. Yes, we mean THAT Four Seasons. OBVIOUSLY. It’s the perfect setting to drink some hops and not take any litigation claims seriously.
~ ~ ~
You know, for all the incompetence, greed, corruption, insanity, xenophobia, homophobia, misogyny, anti-science, racism, disrespect for our military and veterans, and utter lack of morality, empathy and compassion...it’s nice to finally be able to laugh - heartily, loudly - in the face of it all for a brief moment. We hope this IPA brings you a smile. It’s hopped with Simcoe, Idaho 7, Hop 522, with tasting notes of blood orange, pineapple, cherry blossoms, and sweet, sweet democracy.
Look How They Shine IPA
IPA|7.0%|63 IBU
In the early ‘00s, Virgil Gamache Farms released an exciting new IPA hop. The rarely seen press release was odd, but catchy: “Look at the hops, look how they shine for you. And everything you brew. Yeah they are Amarillo. I came along. I grew a hop for you. And all the things you brew. They are named after Yellow.” Coldplay THEN stole the press release and turned it into a multiple platinum hit single and the rest is history. Irregardless (this is now a word), we still remember when Amarillo was the IT hop, long before Strata, Mosaic, Citra, & Simcoe. So we built a modern IPA with 2 Row, Pils, Wheat & Oats around some beautiful Amarillo lots from Roy Farms and Crosby Farms. We sprinkled in a little Citra & Chinook to round it out - but this beer is all about Amarillo, and that juicy, bright citrus hop character. Oh yeah, your pith and nose, turn into something beautiful. For you, we’d brew ourselves dry.
Caller Unkown
Pale|6.0%|48 IBU
What the? Who is this? And why? Oh, it’s a new hop practically nobody has brewed with yet? Ok cool, um YES, send it our way. This thing is called HRC 200009-032 - another hop out of the public breeding program from the USDA and the Hop Research Council. We went 50/50 with it on the hot side along with Citra. And on the Dry Hop - we did 50% HRC along with 25% Citra and 25% Simcoe. The end result is a conference call of ruby red grapefruit, tangerine, pine and lemongrass so please, PICK UP THE BEER and ANSWER IT!
I’m Turning Into My Father
Dad Beer|6.9%|65 IBU
We just want you to know, if you ever need anything, don’t be shy, ok? There are NO rules for this beer. It’s not like a regular dad beer, it’s a COOL dad beer. And ‘tis the season, if you know what we mean! The weather gets colder and wetter, and winter warmers start to hit the shelves. With each passing year, we find ourselves more and more excited to brew, and drink, hoppy red ales. Are they exciting? Not really. Are they cool? Nope. Do we care? Nada. But just like your dad’s favorite brewery slogan: we brew the beer we want to drink - and sell the rest! Bahaha...ok, we’re finished laughing at our own joke. This recipe was blended with multiple crystal malts, hopped with Simcoe, Chinook, Mosaic, and still finishes dry and bitter for the style. It’s burnt breadcrusty and piney and resinousy and roasty. We hope you appreciate and love it for what it is, even if you don’t always agree with it.
Talus A Story IPA
IPA|6.8%
...and it better be punny! So, here we are brewing another beer with HBC 692 and like, THAT SAME DAY, Yakima Chief gives this hop a name. Coincidence?! Pshhhh we think not. It’s been an awesomely unique hop for years - with notes of papaya, passionfruit, raspberry, cherry, ruby red grapefruit, coconut chips, lime….basically a bright, delicious fruit salad. In this rendition, we paired it with Mosaic and Citra because that’s an obvious choice and they can just let the fruit party escalate like that one time we were in an Oakland wine barand...
Dominate Your Life
DIPA|7.8%|68 IBU
It’s simple, ok? Don't let this DIPA dominate your life. Just like COVID-19. You know, the thing that has killed 215,000 Americans (likely more), infected a total of almost 8 million Americans (definitely more), some of which will have lasting complications and repercussions forever - either directly from the virus, or via losing someone to it. You know, the thing that has severely altered travel, so that countless humans haven't seen their extended families, loved ones, children and friends. That little virus that dictates our every cautious action and keeps our mind inundated with warnings, anxiety, and depression, as we try our best to salvage any piece of normalcy, keep a job, afford healthcare and rents and mortgages as we go into more debt, with no bail out, relief or even vacation in sight. This thing that we don’t even know when it will end, that could come back with avengence in a month or two, that has disrupted and weakened the economy, our education system, our public transportation, and democracy as we know it. And we haven’t even gotten to how much worse all of this has impacted those of lower economic status….WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON RIGHT NOW. PLEASE VOTE ALL THESE SELFISH, PRIVELEDGED, GREEDY, INCOMPETENT, SPINELESS SCUMBAGS IN POWER….Ughh...rghhhh…..umm, so this beer. It’s hopped with Strata, Galaxy, Simcoe pellets & cryo - and when you drink it, we hope you can close your eyes and let it be a brief reprieve from all things actually dominating your life.
Drawing A Blanc IPA
IPA|6.7%|60 IBU
What were we about to brew again? A normal IPA? Oh yeah, we can do that. Some 2-Row over there, a little Pils malt over here, keep that base clean & simple. Ok, ok what is next. Hop thoughts. Ahh hmmm let’s use some varieties we haven’t used during harvest like Bru-1, and maybe something not from around here like Hallertau Blanc. And then obviously round it out with Citra because duh. Soft, fruity, balanced, normal...IPA! Heyo! We can do this.
wetwired
Wet Hop IPA|6.8%|50 IBU
Wet Mosaic IPA Collab w/ Holy Mountain & Perrault FarmsWhen our forces combine, we make all your wettest dreams come true.2 Row, Pils, Oats, Wheat26#/bbl of WET Mosaic
And You’re Invited
German-Style Festbier|5.6%|20 IBU
There once was this party over in Germany. It was like, kind of a thing for 200ish years. You should read about it. It’s been cancelled before….because of wars, and pandemics...just like the one we’re in the middle of, but the other ones were less preventable, because they didn’t have MODERN fucking SCIENCE. Anyways...this beer, it’s a tribute to those beers made for that festival, that you can’t go to. It’s light and bready, thanks to a blend of Weyermann Pilsner, Vienna, & CaraMunich malts. We balanced it out with some Magnum & Tettnang hops. While you can’t actually go to the party, this beer invites you to drink a lot of these, and think about what that party would’ve been like. And yeah, it’s a bummer to miss it, but you know what? It’s still nice to be invited.
Splash Waterfalls IPA
Wet Hop IPA|6.6%|51 IBU
Oh! Oh! Oh! Luda!We ‘bout to throw some game, they both one and the same.Loftus’ the one to blame. (HOP, ME!)We about to hop some wet, cause each and every getYou gotta brew it fresh (HOP, ME!)Nineteen pounds per B, oh Citra we love thee.Splash, sip, crush and see (MAKE WET TO ME)
Ultrawet IPA
Wet Hop IPA|7%|58 IBU
Sometimes we find ourselves asking, “How WET can we get this beer?” Like, very wet? Hella wet. Super wet. MEGA WET. Maximum, Ultimate WETNESS. The Wettest. These are important thoughts and questions, and not to be shrugged or brushed off. But we digress. This beer right here? It’s fucking ULTRAWET thanks to 25#/bbl of Wet Simcoe and 4#/bbl of Wet Sabro, both from Perrault Farms - pushing us close to a total of 30#/bbl in this thing. Nobody beats the Wet. Nobody.
Dripping, Soaking
Wet Hop IPA|6.9%|58 IBU
...they must’ve been beautiful in their youth. A legend, a trailblazer, used with style & grace, paving the way for all the starlets after. Still, these flashes of brilliance, leafy smile lines and sun kissed exterior... a perfectly picked lot that reminds you of all the magical history, buried deeply in the firm, luscious bracteoles. It lures you in on a damp harvest day. Dimly lit, within the broad side of a kiln, a foggy steam misting off the cones, a moist warmth that builds into a heavy, sticky humidity. Rich, tantalizing aromas of pine needles, lemon peel, citrus flesh and rose petals fill the room as you grab a handful and rub - harder, rougher, breaking the glands, exposing the core, a culminating mess of wet leaves and lupulin. Dripping, soaking, an exhilarating push to climax as we shake and thrust and shove Wet Cascade from Roy Farms into the car….
Fresh & Wet & Wet & Fresh
Wet Hop Pale|6.3%|50 IBU
First one of the year! A pleasant little pale ale with WET Centennial from CLS and dry-hopped with FRESH kilned, whole cone Simcoe from Perrault to a total of 22#/bbl!
Aqua Seafoam Shame
All Apologies.
Wet Strata Extra IPA
IPA|7.2%|60 IBU
We have a confession to make. We did it again. We drove down to Goschie Farms in Oregon to make this beer - our first ever fresh hop beer that was not brewed with Washington’s finest. But seriously - what else should we be? All Apologies? We brew wet hop beers multiple times a week, for six weeks in a row. Why not make a few with Oregon hops? I mean, they do grow one of the hottest new varieties in the country - Strata - which was developed by Indie Hops in conjunction with Oregon State University. And with assertive tropical notes of guava & passion fruit and a citrus leafy finish thanks to 20#/bbl, you’ll be easily amused. All in all is all we are. 2019 GABF Bronze Medal in Fresh Hop Category.
All Apologies.
This Is Me Trying IPA
IPA|6.8%|55 IBU
Hop Harvest is HERE. But those beers won’t be ready until mid September at the earliest. In the meantime, this is our last regular IPA in the pipeline. And we tried really hard to make you want it. There’s a little bit of Oats in the grist and then we PILED on the Southern Hemisphere hops (Galaxy, Nelson Sauvin, & Vic Secret) along with Citra (of course) to create a compelling, tropical soiree that will keep you interested while we both wait and listen to Taylor Swift’s new album.
Works Every Time IPA
IPA|7.1%|55 IBU
Our 2019 Simcoe hops, from Loftus Ranches, are some of the best we’ve ever had. And combined with some of the best English base malt in the world - Thomas Fawcett Maris Otter - WHAT IS NOT TO LOVE?! The resinous, ruby red grapefruit notes of Simcoe play so well with the rich depth of Maris. And just to accentuate the citrus - we added some Comet, Motueka, & Sabro hops, layering in notes of key lime & lemon peel. Simcoe + Maris Otter = ALWAYS Simcoe + Sabro = AUTOMATIC Hazy West Coasty IPA = IMMEDIATE.
Bored To Death
South German Helles
Lager Beer|5.3%|18 IBU
This is where we’re at right now. There are so many insane, intense, ridiculous, unbelievable things going on in this country, in the middle of a pandemic, that we just can’t even. So we made a beer that is the equivalent of a mental shut down. Just turn that brain right off. This lager is a simple, clean, & uncomplicated companion. Very little malt presence, save for a kiss of cracker & bread crust. And even less hop presence from the restrained usage of Hallertau Mittelfruh. It’s downright boring. And you know what? Sometimes we need boring. Boring is fine. We like boring! And we like Helles!
Muh Freedoms
Taken away.
Double Oat American Stout
Dark Stuff|7.3%|65 IBU
Look. Nobody at Cloudburst is here to take away your drinking freedom. That’s just not who we are. We have principles and this is America dammit! You can order whatever your heart desires - triple milkshake IPA, fruit puree “berliners”, light lagers with corn syrup that say they don’t use corn syrup...at another bar. And you can collect and hoard as many of those thick, barrel-aged stouts as your wallet will allow. As brewers, we exercise the right to make something BIG and BOLD and DARK and HOPPY - all the things, to the MAX. This is a true, glorious American-Style Stout - consider it our DECLARATION of FLAVOR! I mean, go ahead and take away civilian owned semi-automatic assault rifles. But this stout? You can pry this stout from our cold, dead hands.
Taken away.
Both For Me
Pale|5.9%|45 IBU
This beer is like the perfect song, and would most definitely be a finalist in the Eurovision Beer Contest. First, it’s cool fermented...because Iceland is cold. Is that weird? No. It makes this beer exceptionally smooth. And we hopped it with Citra, Mosaic,and Mosaic Cryo. They seem familiar and similar, but probably are not brother-sister. And it is under 6% abv, which means you can have a few. It’s presh, coz. Trust us, the elves did not go too far on this one. Have some! Mmm. We’re checking you out.
Lip Sync Apology IPA
Sorry Not Sorry
IPA|6.9%|60 IBU
We brewed this beer back in 2017, when we were pissed off…..and guess what, we still are. Time to put on Bikini Kill back on and head bang/yell sing to the roots of PNW punk and the riot grrrl movement. It’s still time for a backbone and action and justice and equality. It’s time to rebel, resist and reject this broken system. Refuel with this aggressive, tropical IPA generously hopped with Galaxy, Mosaic, & Citra and continue to fight for what is right and VOTE.
Sorry Not Sorry
How To Cognitive IPA
IPA|7.4%|54 IBU
We actually took one very recently. We made the IPA to see if we are all there. People are wondering, mostly the radical beer geeks. It’s a very standard test. In front of doctors. IPA unbelievable thing. Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV. If you get it in order you get extra points. Citra. Cashmere. Hallertau Blanc. Citra. It’s actually not that easy, but for us, it was easy. They drink it up. We bet you couldn’t do it. We’re looking very strongly at. It is what it is.
In A Perfect World IPA
IPA|6.5%|55 IBU
Lately, we’ve found ourselves saying this phrase all the time, every. single. day. “Well, in a perfect world, yadi yadi yada...” Mostly on a micro level - with brew schedules, production planning, canning runs, sales projections - we have A LOT more moving parts these days. And as creatures of habit, this has been one of the hardest challenges of them all - predicting our week, our day, our afternoon. And of course, we use this phrase on the macro level as well - like how the senate should be power checking an authoritarian wannabe, how members of the house used to represent their constituents over special interests, how fellow humans still fighting an uphill battle for equality & justice, or how the attorney general used to prosecute all citizens that commit large scale, fraudulent crimes. But here we are, 2020, in all it’s fuckery. While the world is far from perfect, and never has been, this IPA is the closest thing we can get to it this week. It’s got a little bit of everything - mostly 2 row, some Maris Otter, and splashes of wheat & oats - and then hopped with Strata, Simcoe, Idaho 7 and Citra for some bright flavors of ruby red grapefruit, passion fruit, guava, & pineapple.
The Kids Don’t Stand A Chance
DIPA|8.6%|60 IBU
This yacht rock inspired, tropical diddy of a DIPA will have you drifting into the sunset thanks to a blend of Citra, BRU-1 & Galaxy hops. It’s like a spritzer with peaches and pineapple and a cherry and an orange wedge thrown into it...but also more body and sweetness...because malt. It’s a beer, is what we’re saying. But the vibe is there, just like an old school Vampire Weekend song….about how big business and wall street and forgetting the past will squeeze out all of your blissful, youthful ignorance and destroy the environment and let’s talk about student debt and the current state of education, or lack thereof, and how underfunded and under supported schools are all across the country - and these kids and they don’t stand a chance and and AND…...STRONG BEER NOW PLEASE.
This Is My Friday
And now it's not.
North German Keller Pils
Lager Beer|5.1%|40 IBU
Not every Friday is somebody’s Friday. Sometimes it’s actually Sunday, or Monday, or Thursday. In this current climate, everyday could be your Friday! Who knows!? But whenever your Friday actually is, this hop-forward, unfiltered and unfined German Pilsner is a beer you can get behind to kick off your weekend. We used a blend of rustic Bohemian Pilsner Malts, and hopped it with Tettnang, Mandarina, & Saphir from Germany along with Czech Saaz in the kettle, whirlpool & fermenter. It’s slightly hazy, with a touch of sulfur, and finishes dry with moderate hop bitterness. You’ve got the whole weekend in front of you, take a deep breathe, soak it in and drink up this crispy, spicy, pithy goodness.
And now it's not.
Why God Why IPA
IPA|6.3%|55 IBU
This IPA was brewed for our first official canning run on our brand new canning line. If you asked us back in January, “Hey Cloudburst - When are you going to buy your own canning line?” we’d have answered “Buy a canning line? We don’t even package our beer in cans!” BUT THEN A GLOBAL PANDEMIC HAPPENED, RENDERING OUR SIMPLE BUSINESS PLAN THAT WORKED SO WELL FOR 4+ YEARS IRRELEVANT OVER THE COURSE OF 10 DAYS. Wait, why are we selling this beer in kegs & crowlers? Turns out we aren’t quite ready to give up on our roots yet (this may or may not have had anything to do with having an inadequate CO2 flow rate wtf fml)....ANYWAY, the end result is an IPA with a light, crisp base and notes of grapefruit, pine trees, resin, lemon peel & pineapple husk thanks to a blend of Citra, HRC 2012004-003 & Chinook...in kegs...and crowlers. To be continued…
People Power IPA
IPA|6.7%|60 IBU
We teamed up again with Threes Brewing, and 100+ other breweries around the country to release a beer named People Power around the 4th of July. There are no rules for this national collab, except one - every brewer must donate 10% of their beer sales to the ACLU. And right now, the ACLU can use all the help they can get. As for our rendition of this beer, we brewed a straightforward Cloudburst IPA and liberally hopped it with Simcoe & Citra, both pellets & cryo, from Loftus Ranches.The end result is a citrus basket of freedom and positivity.More info at peoplepower.beer
Mask On For Service
Pale|5.7%|30 IBU
This cute little juicy pale is just too easy. It’s soft & pleasant thanks to red wheat, white wheat, & flaked oats. There’s some minerality in there as well. The bitterness is super low thanks to late hop additions, and then it was double dry-hopped with Grüngeist, Citra, Idaho 7. You know what else is just too easy? Putting on a mask when you interact with other humans in public. It takes 3 seconds, and it practically makes you a hero. This isn’t a political issue - this is a public health issue. SO JUST FUCKING DO IT. THANK YOU. Now enjoy this crusher of a pale ale.
We Used To Vacation IPA
IPA|6.5%|58 IBU
It’s the last day of June, in the year 2020. Last year, June was filled with trips to England, Kansas City, Ontario, & Portland….and those were for WORK. Yes, they were fun...but they weren’t legit, unplug-from-from-the-matrix-style vacations. THOSE have always been few & far between. Still, we’re longing for any type of getaway right now - be it for work or play. BUT WE CAN’T EVEN. First, there’s a global pandemic that’s still ravaging the states, which could’ve AND should’ve been avoided, prevented, mitigated...like most other developed countries have done….but muh freedoms, ya know? And second, we have a small business to navigate amidst this chaos - which requires important decisions, on the fly, almost daily, that holds the fate of our hopes, dreams, and incomes. At least we can channel some our pent up energy into a delicious IPA, like this one, which starters with a blended malt bill of 2 row, Pils, Red wheat, Golden Naked Oats, & Flaked Wheat and was then loaded with a tropical soiree of Strata, Mosaic, and Vic Secret hops. Someday, we will take a vacation again. Right? RIGHT?! PLEASE! GOD. PLEASE.
Thunder Muscle IPA
Unbelievably Tasty, Unbelievably Gone.
IPA|7.8%|65 IBU
“““Thunder Muscle is the greatest new IPA on the planet….it tastes good and is loaded with the power of 20 ponies…goes down like a syrup sandwich…like the sweet milk of Mother Mary herself… it’s like Rocky and Rocky 3 combined, had a baby and Rocky 2 fucked Rocky 4 and BOOM Rocky 5…it has brain power because of one of the ingredients…and the strength of Zeus if he fucked a hippopotamus…IT’S THUNDER MUSCLE!” – Todd Margaret” - David Cross” – Cloudburst Citra, Comet, Chinook & Centennial
Unbelievably Tasty, Unbelievably Gone.
More Tigers, More Lazerbeams
DIPA|8%|60 IBU
That original beer, some eight years ago, light with a touch of wheat - a perfect vehicle for a new, multi-faceted and complex hop called HBC 369. It was clean, vibrant and tropical, with subtle savory and citrus undertones. But it needed a name, and it needed a label. We threw around ideas of neon, of Lisa Frank, of Ken Kesey, maybe with sharks or a snake - a Boomslang, perhaps?! - or maybe a Tiger? YES! A Tiger, a white tiger, shooting sparkly, neon Laserbeams from it’s eyes!…...well we DID it again. But made it more awesome. How so? More TIGERS, more LASERBEAMS, more MALT, more HOPS, more ALCOHOL, more INDEPENDENCE, more SOUL, more CHARACTER. Warrior, Centennial, El Dorado & LOADS of Mosaic and brewed in Seattle by an adamantly small, forever independent brewery that former Elysian employees still work at.
Phenomena IPA
IPA|7.2%|62 IBU
Yeah yeah yeah! It’s time to bring back this hot time kid! A base of 2 Row and Flaked Rye gets your hazy, soft & silky body off first, and then a hop bill of Nelson Sauvin, Citra, & Huell Melon show their bones with notes of yellow peach, passionfruit, cantaloupe, & tangerine. Supply is limited. They hide it, they hide it, they’re never gonna find it. But those that do find it….They loved it, they shot it. The fastest ran and got it.
Comfort In Numbers IPA
IPA|6.9%|58 IBU
A rising tide lifts all ships...and all hops? For this beer, we blended more varieties than usual - Comet, Mosaic, HBC 692, Sabro, Citra & Galaxy - in hopes they’d create an intense, complex, fruit salad smorgasboard. Like pineapples, papayas, mangos, & oranges with splash of lime juice - OH MY! We’re all in this together right now, and striving to hit critical mass and achieve the change we’ve needed for so long. In the words of Killer Mike - “Plot, Plan, Strategize, Organize, and Mobilize”. Also, stay hydrated...those words are from Cloudburst.
Line Starts Here
English Dark Mild|3.9%|25 IBU
This past Winter, we brewed one of our favorite AND slowest moving beers of all time. A traditional English Dark Mild, a homage to Bill Arnott and Machine House Brewing. It had body, it had balance, it had deep flavor, and it was low in alcohol. What more could you want?! NOT A THING. Since then, BIll has been quoted in Forbes, Imbibe, and THE NEW YORK TIMES...coincidence? Maybe. Maybe Not. But apparently, Dark Mild’s are gaining traction, and we want in on this three hundred year trend. Still, why are they brewed, and bought, so infrequently? Is it because they are so damn sexy that it is downright intimidating to muster up the confidence to order one, let along taste it? Or maybe it’s semantics? English Dark Mild? What. Dark Summer Ale? Ok! Either way, we made some tweaks to our original recipe and it’s even more fire emoji than before. So much so, that we fully expect LINES FOR DAYS for this beer, so just as preemptive clarification...the line starts here.
The New New
Experimental Pale Ale|6.1%|56 IBU
We got our hands on some new experimental hops from the Hop Research Council, which funds the development of new public hop varieties in conjunction with Oregon State University, Washington State University, the Brewers Association and the USDA. As scientists often say, ”That is pretty neat shit!” This particular experimental variety is called HRC 2006009-074, and it’s a Triploid Perle that has scored particularly high on the hedonic scale these past few harvests. You don’t have to know what that last sentence means. ANYWAYS - on the hot side of this brew, we went 50/50 with the HRC and Citra. For the Dry Hop, we went 75% HRC/25% Citra. The end result are notes of yellow peach, tangerine, & starfruit with a crisp, dry finish. How new is this hop? So new it’s new new. That is a thing the kids say. How do you do, fellow kids?
Missing U IPA
IPA|6.8%|62 IBU
We are seriously missing our brewery friends these days. The collabs, the festivals, the conferences, the visits, the hangouts...some days, it just really bums us out, not knowing when it’ll be safe to do any of these things again. And then, we put on Robyn in the brewery and our positivity returns. This small batch IPA is part reminiscent, part modern interpretation of one of our (and our brewer friend’s) favorite OG IPAs - Bell’s Two Hearted (PS - Happy 35th Birthday, Bell’s!)!. There's a splash of dark crystal malt in the bill for color and kiss of caramel sweetness, and it was hopped mostly with Centennial hops from CLS Farms. BUT THEN, we added two HBC Experimental hops that exhibit some prime Centennial character - 522 for the resinous grapefruit and blackberry notes & 630 for the dark cherry undertones. You’re not here with us, the picture’s incomplete. But this beer, and Robyn on full volume, will help get you through.
Really Let Yourself Go
DIPA|8.1%|60 IBU
Look, we’re not judging you. It’s been a rough couple of months, filled with uncertainty, anxiety, illness, and life altering events, that’s compounded by incompetant, reckless decisions made by the powers-that-shouldn’t-be. So why not order an extra pizza from your favorite place, have another beer, have dessert, add a second scoop of ice cream on that dessert, all of the above, combine them all together...YOU ARE SUPPORTING SMALL, LOCAL BUSINESSES AFTER ALL! And while we’re at it, fuck real pants, and fuck belts too - sweatpants/yogapants are WAY BETTER. And, shower every other day, grow out that stubble, let the hair get long, work on that novel, it’s #covidnorules and this is who we are now. It’s not your fault, you can only control so much! This DIPAs hop bill of Simcoe, Citra, & Chinook kinda like a metaphor for all those things we just mentioned. It might seem comfortable and familiar, we probably made one just like it before, but you know what? This is what we want right now! LAY OFF US WE’RE THIRSTY!
Unlimited Breadsticks
Italian Pilsner|5.5%|35 IBU
MAMA MIA! We made an Italian Pilsner! What makes it Italian?! Well, we used German malts (Weyermann Pils), German Lager yeast (thanks Chuckanut!), and German hops (some Tettnang, but mostly Saphir)....AND THEN WE DRY HOPPED IT! SEI FUORI! Yeah, that’s pretty much what this style is...which to us, is about as Italian as Olive Garden. VUOI LIMONARE? But a couple Italian breweries have been doing this for a couple decades, so CHE STORIA! Now it’s a hot ticket style and delicious and refreshing and nutritious! ADESSO PEDALA! BON JOURNO! CHE PALLE!
Something Something Galaxy IPA
IPA|6.8%|58 IBU
This one is for the buzz. And the fuzz. What does that mean? It doesn’t matter. We loaded this thing up with Galaxy hops. You know, from AUSTRALIA. And some Citra. And also, some Hop 692 for a little tropical twisty delight. The malt bill is simple, mostly 2 row, some pilsner, and THREE TYPES OF OATS. People love oats. So do horses. Back on the hops. Just think about this: GALAXY. It’s vast, it’s expansive, it’s intangible, it’s unique, it’s delicious. GALAXY. That’s the ticket.
Tell Me Lies
We did, and you didn't even know.
Contemporary American-Style Pilsner
Contemporary American-Style Pilsner|5.4%|38 IBU
Back by semi-popular demand! Our first time around, this was a bit lower abv, and we considered it a session lager...and then won a Gold medal at the Washington Beer Awards in that category. So that is neat. This time around, it gained a little strength, but is still sessionable to us, especially with that old-meets-new-world hop bill of Cascade, Mosaic, & Galaxy. You see - lagers are super easy to make and require no skill nor attention to details nor patience nor prior brewing experience whatsoever. Nope, you can’t disguise. Soon, they will flood the market and craft will be stoked because sessionable, subtle, balanced beers are what they are always asking for. Oh, we’ll tell ya lies. Sweet, little lies. Unlike somebody else's lies….those are not sweet, nor little, AND WE TOLD OURSELVES WE WOULDN'T GO THERE ON THIS DESCRIPTION.
We did, and you didn't even know.
Not A Doctor IPA
Still doesn't matter
What The Actual Fuck
IPA|6.7%|60 IBU
We, Cloudburst, are not a Doctor. And we don’t play one on TV. BUT….we do wear masks in public, just like doctors wear in the operating room. We also know a few doctors too, and there is definitely some airwave osmosis going on. And because of this, we just wanna say - WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!? People are protesting their right to sneeze into their friend’s mouths if they want to? They want to be FREE so that they can put others at risk? The PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES wants you to sun your lungs and inject yourself with over the counter disinfectants?!? After his previous advice of just having patients take other drugs used to treat other illnesses, that never went through any type of research nor testing nor trials. What’s next? Trepanning and bloodletting and fecal transplants? I mean, we get it - you can’t even see the virus, but we’re pretty sure it exists (right?!), and how do we KILL IT when we can’t even use our guns on it?! Oh yeah...SCIENCE. HOLY FUCK it’s like somebody read 1984 and Handmaid’s Tale and Dianetics at the same time and here the fuck we are. Maybe this IPA brewed with 2 row & Maris Otter malt and hopped with a tropical soiree of Strata, Nelson Sauvin, & Simcoe gets your mind off this shit...
Still doesn't matter
Swoon
Farewell, my pretty.
Pale|5.3%|27 IBU
This dry-hopped pale features some of the hottest international nose candy around. Super sexy Vic Secret hops from Australia are the main attraction, with juicy Huell Melon hops from Germany lending some depth down the runway. Quit gawking, stop drooling and drink it up before she fades away.
5.3% abv, 27 IBUs
Farewell, my pretty.
Unreliable Narrator
Reliably Consumed
Pale|5.5%|35 IBU
A simple malt bill takes a backseat to allow the protagonist Nelson Sauvin and Mandarina hops to prevail. Dank, citrus, and tropical aromatics are prominent themes, and the conclusion is for you to decide.
5.5% abv, 35 IBUs
Reliably Consumed
Vibes and Stuff IPA
RIP Phife's Beer
IPA|7.2%|69 IBU
We listen to a lot of Tribe Called Quest in the brewery and in the tasting room, so we made a beer for Phife Dawg. A light yet balanced, tropical meets floral IPA featuring El Dorado hops. There’s a little bit of Simcoe and Mosaic in there too to give it a bit of depth. Phife once rapped “Go out on my own, somethin’ that I gotta do; do what the hell I want and have no on to listen to.” We’ll drink to that.
7.2% abv, 69 IBUs
RIP Phife's Beer
Tickle Party IPA
Tee hee hee ha haha HA AH AHHH POPSICLE!
IPA|6.4%|58 IBU
Tickle Party starts off innocent, silly and fun. But then the hops join in and things escalate pretty quickly – a whirlwind of citrus, white grape, ripe peach, and pine thanks to a blend of Nelson Sauvin, Citra, El Dorado, Cascade, & Amarillo. By the end of the party, your palate is exhausted and happy for some breathing room…until you dive right back in on the next sip.
6.4% abv, 58 IBUs
Tee hee hee ha haha HA AH AHHH POPSICLE!
Punch Drunk Love
Love Drunk Punch.
Huh|8.2%|40 IBU
This red-tinted, fruit punch inspired strong pale was brewed with 84 pounds of sweet cherry puree and 9 gallons of pineapple juice. Bittered with Sorachi Ace, and finished with Citra, Cascade, and Centennial hops give it a lemony and citrusy hop forward backbone. Be careful, it sneaks up on you.
Love Drunk Punch.
Psycho Hose Beast
Bye Wayne. Byeeeeeee.
TIPA|9.5%|80 IBU
A Triple IPA brewed with way too many hops, and a gun rack. And we don't even own *a* gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire gun rack.
Chinook, Cascade, Citra. Simcoe, & El Dorado.
Bye Wayne. Byeeeeeee.
Pigeonhole IPA
Boxed Out
IPA|7%|65 IBU
Did you know we make a lot of beer styles? Like more than IPA? We DO! Stouts, Porters, Saisons, Pales, Pilsner, with many more in the pipeline. You should try them! But here's an IPA to enjoy while you decide on your next beer. A kiss of honey malt, followed by Chinook, Citra, Amarillo, and LOTS of Simcoe.
Boxed Out
Untitled Unmastered IPA
Untapped
IPA|7.2%|64 IBU
Kendrick Lamar is always inspired to explore & experiment with new ideas, and so are we (we’re pretty much twins). This IPA started as an unfinished demo, and evolved to fruition over time. We gave it a sturdy malt backbone of pale crystal malt & munich, and then let a compilation of Warrior, Melon, Cascade, Citra, and Loral (formally #291) hops improvise off each other. The result is a refreshing IPA with a futuristic hop profile – flavors of hondeydew, citrus, strawberry, & mango bounce off notes of flowers, green tea & mint.
7.2% abv, 64 IBUs
Untapped
The Essence of Wetness
A Wet Eugoogooly.
IPA|6.7%|75 IBU
Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty. This beer represents the classic beauty of wet hops and the PNW: it’s leafy & chewy & grapefruity & piney & resiny with assertive green hop flavor down the runway and back. Brewed with Wet Centennial from CLS Farms and Wet Cluster from Joe Champoux Farms at a ratio of 7#/bbl, it is certainly not a wet hop beer for ants.
6.7% abv, 75 IBUs
A Wet Eugoogooly.
Sorachi Not Sorry
Pale|5.3%|45 IBU
Oh Sorachi Ace. You, my friend, are an individual snowflake. Dominant & distinct & intense, a trained palate can taste and smell you in every beer you touch. You and your big notes of White Oak, Lemon Peel, & Coconut. Anyone can brew with you, but only a few can master you. That’s why we brought in our other friends Simcoe and El Dorado to mellow you out a touch, with their notes of overripe orange, peach skin, and green tea. We think it did the trick, but don’t be fooled by the low abv and IBUs, this beer is a palate wrecker, sorry not sorry.
5.3% abv, 45 IBUs
Waiting for BIll
Seriously, where the fuck is Bill?
Pale|6.2%|50 IBU
As some of you know, Bill is leaving us. And while we are going miss a lot of things about him, we are not going to miss waiting for him. You see, we regularly find ourselves waiting for Bill, asking ourselves: What is taking so long? Where the fuck is Bill? What IS Bill even doing? I never know what he’s doing….Anyways…This Pale has a little White Wheat in it for body, and was hopped with Chinook, Ella, Mandarina, and El Dorado. It’s a citrus and fruit forward Pale perfect to consume while you’re waiting for Bill.
6.2% abv, 50 IBUs
Seriously, where the fuck is Bill?
Younger Us
Remember that time?
Huh|7.5%|28 IBU
True Story: Both Steve and Zach’s first jobs in the brewing industry were at Allagash Brewing in Portland, Maine (2005 and 2008, respectively). With fond memories and endless respect, they brewed a homage to the brewery that broke them in with this amplified, twisted version of the old flagship. White and red wheat, along with oats, give the beer its haze and silky mouthfeel, while the coriander, bitter orange peel, and secret spice drive the aromatics. It was then fermented with our French Saison yeast, making the beer finish fruity, dry and tart.
7.5% abv, 28 IBUs
Remember that time?
Velvet Snow
Turn off the lights 'cause they're coming bright.
Dark Stuff|4.7%|20 IBU
A creamy yet light classic Irish Stout blended with homemade cold brew with Conduit Coffee Roasters beans. Underneath the fluffy white head lies huge notes of roast, with hints of smoke and tart fruit, and a warm, energetic buzz. Turn off the lights ‘cause they’re coming bright.
4.7% abv, 20 IBUs
Turn off the lights 'cause they're coming bright.
Remember the Maine
That ship has sunk.
Dark Stuff|5.1%|29 IBU
The USS Maine was a battleship that suddenly exploded, without warning, and sunk off the coast of Havana in 1898. It served as a catalyst to the Spanish American War, even though many speculate its demise was due to an internal, mechanical error and not due to a secret attack from Spain. So yeah, we named our pumpkin beer after an imploding, sinking ship.
5.1% abv, 29 IBUs
That ship has sunk.
Pom Pom IPA
Ra Ra Sis Boom Bye.
IPA|7%|62 IBU
How does a regular IPA grab attention during Fresh Hop Season? With cheerleaders, duh. And how do cheerleaders grab attention during Football Games? Obviously, with pom poms.
Cha Cha Chaboochie Roll Call: Polaris, El Dorado, Citra, Mosaic, Simcoe, & Huell Melon.
7.0% abv, 62 IBUs
Ra Ra Sis Boom Bye.
Welcome to the graveyard. Some never return!
Water Weight
The weight has been shed!
DIPA|8.3%|79 IBU
Did you know: green (wet) hops are 75% moisture? That’s a whole lotta water! So to compensate for the excess water weight, we used 9#/bbl of Simcoe from Loftus farms in kettle and post-boil steep. Big, juicy notes of ruby red grapefruit and pine abound in a heavyweight bout on your palate.
8.3% abv, 79 IBUs
The weight has been shed!
Wet Hop Indian Summer
We showed you the fever, now into the fire.
Pale|6%|40 IBU
It’s always fun to get away from camp Cloudburst, even if it’s for an hour. On this trip to Yakima, we picked up 15#/bbl of Citra and Loral hops from Loftus Ranches, and we made a pact to all meet back there ten years later at 9:30am. Wet hops were used from mash to knock out, and everywhere in between – resulting in chewy, green flavors and notes of peaches, strawberries, and tangerines. This beer will show you the fever, into the fire, taking it higher and higher. Nothing to fear, it’s only desire, taking it higher and higher.
6.0% abv, 40 IBUs
We showed you the fever, now into the fire.
Precious Freshious
myyyyy presshhhus.
Fancy Beer|6.7%|15 IBU
A blend of our Market Fresh Series that were aged in white burgundy barrels from Delille Cellars in Woodinville, WA over the course of 6 - 7 months. Oak tannins, white burgundy, stone fruit, cracked pepper, and hay (is for horses). This beer is a delicate, subtle flower - let it warm up to let it bloom.
6.7% abv, 15 IBUs
myyyyy presshhhus.
Tigers & Lazerbeams
All Glowed Out.
IPA|7%|60 IBU
I remember the meeting like it was yesterday. We had this beer - light with a touch of wheat - a perfect vehicle for a new, multi-faceted and complex hop called HBC 369. It was clean, vibrant and tropical, with subtle savory and citrus undertones. But it needed a name, and it needed a label. We threw around ideas of neon, of Lisa Frank, of Ken Kesey, maybe with sharks or a snake - a Boomslang, perhaps?! - or maybe a Tiger? YES! A Tiger, a white tiger, shooting sparkly, neon Lazerbeams from it’s eyes!…
But that was then, and this is now. That beer is just another brand in yet another fake “craft” portfolio under an aimless “High End” division of a soulless and out-of-touch multibillion dollar MNC.
Warrior, Centennial, El Dorado & LOADS of Mosaic
7.0% ABV, 60 IBUS, and brewed in Seattle by an adamantly small, forever independent brewery that 5 former Elysian employees still work at.
All Glowed Out.
Rhythm Method IPA
Pulled Out & Prayed.
IPA|6.7%|60 IBU
For this IPA, we’re putting our money where our name is - 10% of all revenue generated from this beer in the tasting room will be donated to Planned Parenthood, so that they can continue to teach humans about sex education, contraception, cancer screening & STD prevention. Hopped with Citra, El Dorado, Loral & Huell Melon - big floral notes mix with flavors of ripe stone fruit, citrus, & honeydew. In dark times like these…Care. No matter what.
6.7% abv, 60 IBUs
Pulled Out & Prayed.
Swedish Prison Orgy
All orgies must come to an end.
TIPA|9.6%|79 IBU
This is NOT a country club beer. This beer is a reverse blindside, a bleached mullet of pure talent that earns a Jordache endorsement and hangs out all night with David Copperfield doing awesome stuff. It is a fascinating creature, an awakened sleeping dragon, it’s nothing short of a miracle, and it’s not going to apologize. Hey, what happens between two or three or six hops is natural and it’s beautiful. By the time you reach the finish, your palate will have gone through 7 Days in Hell, and will have you pleading…please end it, please end it.
Citra, Mosaic, El Dorado, Vic Secret, Nelson Sauvin, & Galaxy.
9.6% abv, 79 IBUs
All orgies must come to an end.
Slap Bag IPA
The bag has been slapped.
IPA|7.4%|67 IBU
Once upon a time, in our misspent youth, we played one of dumbest drinking games known to exist. This game consisted of pulling the bladder out of a box of wine, and throwing it at each other in between taking long pulls from the plastic tap while slapping the bag. That’s it. That’s the game… Um. So yeah, this IPA was generously hopped with Nelson Sauvin, Vic Secret, Huell Melon, & Hallertau Blanc - all hops that possess wine-like elements (get it?!) - exhibiting notes of passion fruit, gooseberry, honeydew, white grape, and a touch of minerality - making it just a bit more complex than Franzia.
7.4% abv, 67 IBUs
The bag has been slapped.
Soul Proprietor IPA
The beer is dead, but the soul lives on.
IPA|7.3%|60 IBU
This is the first beer of the newly established Bottleshop Collaboration Project. What’s the BCP? It’s 11 small, local, independent bottle shops in Western Washington that share common values and a love of craft beer. And since we love being small, local, & independent too, we made a juicy IPA to celebrate them, support their cause, & lure you to their business to spend some cash money!
Chinook, Citra, Galaxy, & Mosaic Dust.
7.3% abv, 60 IBUs
The beer is dead, but the soul lives on.
Shame Spiral
We regret nothing. Ok, maybe a few things.
DIPA|8.7%|78 IBU
This beer goes out to that anxiety-ridden morning after of a drunken night out. As the brain fog lifts, and you start to remember pieces of specific conversations, events, actions that make you cringe with embarrassment, and laugh, and regret, and hope that nobody else remembers that you fell off the stage in the middle of singing Celine Dion karaoke that you decided to take artistic liberty on by ad-libbing a “Fuck Trump” chant while the song crescendos. Wait. What? Galaxy, Citra, & Hop 522
Notes of peaches, nectarines, tangelos, & grapefruit, combined with a sneaky ABV you might soon regret.
8.7% abv, 78 IBUs
We regret nothing. Ok, maybe a few things.
Remaining Mind
Your moment of zen is over.
Pale|5.1%|25 IBU
Cloudburst word of the day: Zanshin. Zanshin translates to “remaining mind” and is the 4th state of zen, which has two equal parts: a state of relaxed awareness and perceptiveness combined with a state of ease and confidence in the follow through of action. We started with a lighter base, added Mango puree to the fermenter, and then infused the beer with two equal parts of green tea: powdered Sen Cha & whole leaf Sen Cha Fukamushi. We need to relax for a hot minute, and you do to.
5.1% abv, 25 IBUs
Your moment of zen is over.
Yawn
BOOOOORING
Dark Stuff|9.1%|48 IBU
Oh, you know, just a boring, plain old Imperial Stout. No bells or whistles, no fun twists or bizarre additions. Not even coffee? Nope. It is simple, straight forward and uncomplicated. It is Yawn.
9.1% abv, 48 IBUs
BOOOOORING
Standard Operating Procedure IPA
Operation with Barley Browns is Complete.
IPA|7.1%|55 IBU
First, you ask one of the most award winning brewers that’s run by some of the nicest people in the industry to make a beer with you. Then, we talk malt. Some of theirs (Gold Rush Pilsner from Baker City, OR) and some of ours (Rhar 2-row). Plus a little bit of others. Next, we move onto hops. The Baker City boys use lots of Chinook, Simcoe, & Citra. We like those too - but we also like to mix/twist/weird shit up - so we agree to add Ekuanot to the mix. Double Dry-Hop? Double Dry-Hop. Brew, Pitch, Ferment, Hop, Condition, Fine, Carb, Rack, Tap, Pour, Smell, Drink, Drink, Drink.
7.1% abv, 55 IBUs
Operation with Barley Browns is Complete.
See No Evil IPA
Eyes Wide Open
IPA|7.2%|60 IBU
In times like these, it sure would be nice to be a blind monkey. At least you could still smell the notes of raspberries, peaches, and flower petals from all the Loral hops. No need to acknowledge impropriety when you can turn a blind eye, sit back and enjoy how Citra and El Dorado and Mosaic integrate so easily with Loral. It’s an easy, unencumbered path with your eyes closed. Just feign ignorance and swallow the kool-aid.
7.2% abv, 60 IBUs
Eyes Wide Open
Wanna Get Away IPA
Oh, it got away
IPA|7.5%|68 IBU
Our President is an illiterate, narcissistic, xenophobic sociopath with the fragile temperament of three year old. We’ve had one of the wettest, grayest, coldest winters in PNW history. Traffic has been an atrocious time suck, and public transportation leaves much to be desired. The cost of living is getting obscene, and is still rising. And the Seahawks might trade Richard Sherman. FUCK IT. WE NEED TO GET AWAY….but we can’t. So we brewed an IPA with all New Zealand and Australian hops, because we want to be there. It’s light and sunny, with gentle floral and tropical notes. Close your eyes and go to your happy place.
Ella, Kohatu, Rakau, Galaxy, Nelson Sauvin, & Motueka.
7.5% abv, 68 IBUs
Oh, it got away
Riddle Wrapped
Still an enigma
Pale|5.9%|49 IBU
You know that saying ‘it’s a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma’? You wanna know where that came from?? Well, we’re going to tell you either way - Winston Fucking Churchill said that about the Motherfucking Russians in 1939. Here’s the direct quote: ”I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma; but perhaps there is a key. That key is Russian national interest.” If the present day relevance doesn’t make your jaw drop, then these uber dank and tropical Australian Enigma hops will. And then you’ll be like “Wait. What were we just talking about? Oh yeah. Beer.”
5.9% abv, 49 IBUs
Still an enigma
Tigers in Tiny Spaces
In a glass case of emotion.
Pale|6%|45 IBU
Brewed exclusively for the Oregon Brewer’s Festival, which is in it’s 30th year. That’s older than most of YOU. When you get a lot of brewers together and put them in an enclosed space, it might sound like an amusing idea…but be careful, anything can happen.
Chinook, Citra, Loral, 522
6.0% abv, 45 IBUs
In a glass case of emotion.
Summer Abroad IPA
The experience was cool and all.
IPA|7.4%|58 IBU
Are you interested in a life-altering, knowledge-expanding, cultural immersion? If so, you’re invited to embark on a brief adventure to Germany with us. There, you’ll discover the essence and flavors of Mandarina Bavaria and Huell Melon hops. Those notes of candied citrus, tangerine, watermelon, & spice pair nicely with that familiar Citra flavor and West Coast bitterness from back home. Drink now for program fees and dates.
7.4% abv, 58 IBUs
The experience was cool and all.
Wicked Awesome
See yah kid.
Pale|5.4%|18 IBU
This beeah is the best kid! It’s made with sweet wheet and fackin bloobarries - just like the fancy beeahs you and Tommy would drink bahk in the day befaw you wah twenty wan in his muthahs cellah but bettah becawse this one doesnt have a weeahd dawg on the label or come from Wahchusett - FACK Wahchusett buncha hicks - but it’s so pissah they prolly don’t have it at Cumbees or the regulah pahcky but they prolly have it at the fancy place ovah by root wan. I could go an forevah but ya beeah is wahming up and the sawx game is ahn so I’ll just shaht the fack up. Get it in ya! Go Sawx!
5.4% abv, 18 IBUs
See yah kid.
Pretty Little Liar
Never Trust a Pretty Beer.
Pale|5%|40 IBU
This beer includes the A Team cast of hops - Citra, Simcoe, & Mosaic. But never trust a pretty beer with an ugly secret. Something is slightly different here. Lurking underneath those familiar notes of tropical and citrus fruits, Hop 438 exposes itself with hints of lime and cedar. What are your motives, Hop 438? To twist this group of friends and bring them into unknown and unchartered territory? It’s best to keep your malt close and your hops closer.
5.0% abv, 40 IBUs
Never Trust a Pretty Beer.
Placeholder
Place held.
Pale|4.9%|25 IBU
You’re probably thinking “what the fuck is this little light beer these idiots made? I want hops! Give me the hoppy shit! HOPS OR GTFO!!” But guess what else is HOT right now? Kolschs. Also, Table Beers…kinda. And since we’re not located in Cologne, nor within a Belgian Abbey, we can’t truly make either style. But we can be inspired by them and make something similar yet different. So, we used a blend of Pale and Pilsner Malt, combined it with herbal Polaris, floral Rakau, spicy Saaz, and citrusy Mandarina, and fermented it on the cooler side with our house yeast. Just take it or leave it. But probably take it.
4.9% abv, 25 IBUs
Place held.
Whenever, Wherever IPA
that was the deal my dear
IPA|7.2%|58 IBU
Guess what Shakira’s 3 favorite hops are? Cashmere, Citra, & El Dorado. She told us that, so we made a beer for her. Luckily their flavors are fruity and herbal, so you don’t confuse them with OJ. But haze will be there and bitterness will be near, and that’s the deal my dear. Honestly, there’s nothing left to fear, if you really feel the way we feel….about IPAs.
7.2% abv, 58 IBUs
that was the deal my dear
Physical Challenge
We got slimed.
DIPA|8.4%|68 IBU
We have three great hops here today, along with some pilsner and pale malt.
Nelson Sauvin - Here’s how this game works. We’re going to make a beer with you, ok? And if you need help with that beer, you can Dare Citra and Mosaic to join in the fun. If Citra and Mosaic need more depth, they give the beer back to you as a Double Dare, or you have the option for A PHYSICAL CHALLENGE.
…
PHYSICAL CHALLENGE! OK, Here’s whats gonna happen, when I say go, we’re gonna empty pilsner and pale malt into this large tun over here. Then, we’re gonna mix it up, collect some wort and dump the rest out, by spilling as little of the mash on the floor as possible. Nelson Sauvin, your job is to get added to the kettle over here. Citra and Mosaic, you’ll be over here and be added to the kettle as well. Once you're done in the kettle, all three of you need to run over to the fermenter and get in as quickly as possible. Careful, the yeast is tricky over there - you’re going to have navigate it to not get muddled in the process. After that, you’ll need to save some flavors and aroma for the final dry-hop. It might seem really hard, but you have 17 days to complete this challenge. Understand? OK, on your mark…get set…GO!
8.4% abv, 68 IBUs
We got slimed.
Plays Well With Others
Sharing was caring
DIPA|8.7%|71 IBU
Oh El Dorado. We love you for all that you are - soft and subdued, stonefruity, and herbacious. A true role player, a supporting actor, a helping hop. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride. Well, this is your time to step up! We teamed you up with some all stars - Citra & Mosaic - plus a similarly complementary hop in Loral. But this DIPA is about YOU, El Dorado. Shine bright like a diamond!
8.7% abv, 71 IBUs
Sharing was caring
Wet Bandits
Home Alone.
DIPA|8%|60 IBU
What’s so funny? What are you laughing at? Oh, just a fucking massive 35 pounds per barrel of Hop 438 from Perrault Farms and Cascade from Loza Farms that our friends from Varietal Beer Company practically stole and brought over for this beer. We told them not to do it, but it’s their calling card. And you know what? It made the most complex fresh hop beer we’ve ever tasted, with huge notes Lime, Peach, Cedar, Spruce, & Tangerine. Have as many as you like - just don’t get caught by an 8 year old who was left home alone while his parents attended Fresh Hop Fest.
8.0% abv, 60 IBUs
Home Alone.
Safe Travels
They were!
Pale|5.8%|40 IBU
We put the hands of this beer in a responsible, reliable first-born child named Centennial. We brewed it well, gave it ideal & loving conditions to prosper, and left it in charge as Mom & Dad traveled to China for the week. We knew we could trust it to not leave the oven on, have some fun with younger siblings Citra and Idaho 7, and to not get too estery with the next door neighbor Yeast. When we came back from our trip, everything was classic and clean - lots of pine and resin with a kiss of bright citrus layered throughout a simple malt bill and dry finish.
5.8% abv, 40 IBUs
They were!
Whoa’ts
Whoaaaaaa. Wait. Where is it?
Dark Stuff|5%|35 IBU
[Blossom enters the kitchen with a 32oz growler in hand, Joey is reverse sitting on a chair]
Blossom: Joey, you gotta try this new Oatmeal Stout from Cloudburst! They used 3 different types of oats in it and a handful of roasted malts, and then fermented it with a classic English yeast strain!
Joey Russo: [Pauses. Looks into Camera]...Whoa’ts!
Blossom: I know. It’s like they just get me - complex and mysterious, approachable and unassuming, silky and smooth...I could curl up on a couch by a fire and just drink like 4 of these while thinking about how to save the world.
Joey Russo: [Pauses. Looks into Camera]...Whoa’ts!
Six [talking rapidly]: Blossom have you seen my new denim hat? The front flips up and it’s gotta big sunflower on the front of it! They’re ALL the rage and super cute and it works perfectly with my single-strapped denim overalls and Doc Martin’s and Joey thinks it’s cute too. Right, Joey? JOEY PAY ATTENTION TO ME.
Joey Russo: [Pauses. Looks into Camera]...Whoa’ts!
5% abv, 35 IBUs
How are you supposed to have a good time when death and destruction is all you see? Well, you can start by briefly forgetting about the world and getting lost in this IPA. It’s a good vibration of Citra, Galaxy, Mosaic, and Ekuanot hops that will have the sound of sunshine is callin’ your name. And good vibration is all we need. Party People Yeah! We like to see you dance...briefly. And then, back to fighting the good the fight.
7.4% abv, 58 IBUs
We liked seeing you dance.
Planned Obsolescence
Obsolete. Just like we planned.
DIPA|8.2%|80 IBU
This is the latest, greatest, updated version of the newest Cloudburst Double India Pale Ale v. 14. It is loaded with cutting edge, desirable, exotic hop varieties named Nelson Sauvin, Galaxy, and Citra and hopped with .1 more hops per barrel than ever before. The internal maltchanics are supported by 2-row, in conjunction with a touch of wheat and pilsner malt. It is BIG. It is DRY. It is BITTER. It is WHITE GRAPEFRUIT meets PASSION FRUIT meets WHITE GRAPE meets MINERALITY. You are going to want to buy this ASAP. Especially because our last DIPA you had is now dull and stupid and obsolete. You want THIS one. Right now. It’s the best one of ours there is! Until it’s not relevant anymore….which will be in approximately 24 days. But you didn’t hear that from the manufacturer, ok?
8.2% abv, 80 IBUs
Obsolete. Just like we planned.
Silence Breaker IPA
IPA|6.8%|60 IBU
Inspired by recent events, we wanted to use beer as vehicle for positive change. In solidarity and support of strong humans finding the courage to speak out about sexual assault, 1$ of every pint of this IPA sold in our tasting room will be donated to the King County Sexual Assault Resource Center, a local non-profit organization that gives a voice to victims in our own backyard. They offer treatment & services to victims and their families, while working hard to change the beliefs and attitudes surrounding sexual assault and offering a support network to encourage other victims to speak out. For more information, visit kcsarc.org. Oh and about the beer - This IPA is generously hopped with Mosaic pellets and cryo, along with a supporting cast of Cascade and Citra.
6.8% abv, 60 IBUs
FYI - you left your web cam on...
Would You Rather IPA
Would Rather.
IPA|7.3%|60 IBU
Would you rather buy a keg or pint of an IPA produced by a small, local, independent brewery -OR- a large, multi-national corporation? Would you rather drink an IPA that is thoughtfully designed, carefully brewed and gently processed or churned out, pumped around, and ripped through filters? Would you rather have an ever evolving light malt bill that allows hop combinations to shine through or have an outdated and muddled recipe full of caramel malt and earthy hops? We could keep going, but we’re getting thirsty. If you chose “yes” to all of the first options, this beer is for you. If you didn’t...for real?
Citra, Cascade Dust, & Hop 522.
7.3% abv, 60 IBUs
Would Rather.
Shoulder Lean
Leaned and Got Lit.
DIPA|8.6%|70 IBU
You might not know how to dance, but after a couple of these, that might change. In the meantime, you can be like Young Dro, and just let your shoulder lean. With a hop combo of Citra, Hallertau Blanc, and Cashmere and a good dose of Flaked Oats, this DIPA is as comfy and hip as a male romper at a Southern BBQ (burn!). And with big notes of peach flesh, white grape and tangerine in addition to ample haze, you know all the shorties will be into it too. Lean and get lit.
8.6% abv, 70 IBUs
Leaned and Got Lit.
Pop A Shot
Times Up.
Pale|5.2%|42 IBU
Here’s the game: Pale, Carahell, and Carafoam malt are up against Comet, Citra, & Loral hops. The malts start off with an effortless, clean swish but then are overpowered by flurry of satsuma and grapefruit notes from the Comet and Citra, along with a little creamy vanilla spice from the Loral to round it out. The malt tries to match shot for shot to keep the balance, but it is no match against the formidable Yakima Express. With a dry, bright finish and lower abv - a rematch is bound to happen. Again and again.
5.2% abv, 42 IBUs
Times Up.
Steve and Zach Awesome Beer, Great Job!
For your health.
TIPA|9.9%|80 IBU
Well you know we used a lot malt in this beer. LOTS of malt. Hops too. Hops are different than malt, but kinda the same thing. They really contribute to the taste, the flavor. People will taste this and definitely be like, “Mhmm. Yep. Flavor.” There’s also alcohol in it too, which is beneficial in small doses. For your health, Dr. Steve Brule. It’s got muscles for bones. This is a beer you could be innernette best friends with. That’s our beer!
Mmm..uhh..citraandsimcoeandmosaicandequinox. Pelletsandcryo.
9.9% abv, 80 IBUs
For your health.
Very Stable Genius IPA
Our best beer ever and always.
IPA|7.4%|62 IBU
Everybody knows our two greatest assets are HOPS. It's just very sad that not everybody is as good at...their tremendous benefits. Just look at Crooked Hillary and Sloppy Steve and you'll see [inaudible] tremendous dishonesty. What we do is THE best, and we're making IPA great again, just like we said. We're VERY successful despite fake beers and ridiculous collusion between Simcoe, Idaho 7, and Amarillo hops. SAD. We use them a lot - enormously consensual - which qualifies as not smart, but genius.
7.4% abv, 62 IBUs
Our best beer ever and always.
Positive Reinforcement
Good Job, Good Effort.
Pale|6.5%|40 IBU
Dear Huell Melon Hops,
You smell THE. FUCKING. BEST. out the bag. Like straight up watermelon, canteloupe, lychee and hondeydew - it’s amazing. We seriously have no idea how the Germans created you. But while we marvel at you in pellet form, you just can’t seem to make that flavor and aroma hang on all the way through the beer. That’s why we added just a teeny bit of Citra and Mosaic hops to help you out. With those two allstars by your side, we hope you gain the confidence to break free and get your melon on.
With Love and Support, Cloudburst Brewing
6.5% abv, 40 IBUs
Good Job, Good Effort.
Shine Together IPA
Told me you’d be here forever?
IPA|7.1%|58 IBU
The Citra hop once sang to the Australian Ella hop - “When the sun shines, we shine together; told you I’ll be here forever, said I’ll always be your friend, took an oath that i’m gonna stick it out to the end. Now that it’s raining more than ever, know that we still have each other. You can stand under my umbrella. ELLA, ELLA, eh eh eh.” And the Australian Ella hop ran into Citra’s arms, no longer alarmed, and let the soft citrusy and peachy notes pour. Ooh baby it’s raining raining - drink into me.
7.1% abv, 58 IBUs
Told me you’d be here forever?
Turn Up the Lights
It was extra bright baby, did you see it?
DIPA|8.3%|70 IBU
We know you all dig Flashing Lights IPA. So, we turned up the lights in here baby, extra bright because we want y’all to see this. It’s got fast cars, shooting stars. Citra, Mosaic, & Cascade hops. A light malt bill and dry finish. So if you want it you can get it for the rest of your life...or like the next three weeks. We want you to taste everything, want you to taste all of the lights. But only for a limited time.
8.3% abv, 70 IBUs
It was extra bright baby, did you see it?
Social Suicide
Damn. You were so lucky to have us guide you.
Dark Stuff|4.9%|45 IBU
You can’t brew a black IPA, nobody drinks those. Same with session beers. Combine the two, and it’s worse than joining the mathletes. It’s social suicide. But wait. Shut up. Seriously sit down. This beer is like really pretty. And kinda cute actually. It’s all carbs, which is perfect if you want to lose three pounds. And the hop bill of simcoe, Idaho 7, Amarillo, & Citra is so fetch that we won’t even have to use African voodoo on you to make you like it. I know right? It’s not a regular beer, it’s a cool beer. A hump day treat. Damn you are so lucky to have us guide you.
4.9% abv, 45 IBUs
Damn. You were so lucky to have us guide you.
Rainfall IPA
Who’ll stop the rain?
IPA|7.5%|40 IBU
Our friends from Portland, OR came up and things. Got. Juicy! We started with a base of PIlsner Malt, White Wheat, and Oats, added a whirlpool addition of Mosaic, Citra & Galaxy, and followed it up with a massive dry-hop of Galaxy, Enigma, Vic Secret, Motueka, & Ella. The end result is a soft, balanced tropical downpour of haze!
7.5% abv, 40 IBUs
Who’ll stop the rain?
Please Work IPA
Worked.
IPA|6.4%|67 IBU
You may or may not have noticed, but we have a new brewhouse in the building. This eventually means a little more beer for everybody with about the same amount of work for Steve and Zach (but not for Noah, because he has more beer to move...sorry Noah). We were down for 12 days for set-up, delivery, & install - and that means we needed to figure this thing out FAST. Thus, our first brew day turned into a very long and stressful double brew of a brand new IPA so that our taproom and our loyal (and understanding, and patient, and…) accounts would not run out. We loaded this up with Ekuanot, Mosaic, & Citra hops to ensure predictable citrus, tropical and spicy notes that everybody loves with a prominent, west coast bitterness. The end result was a success - because the beer tastes good, all the machinery worked, and nobody died (or, quit) in the process. Cheers to many more turns on the new baby.
6.4% abv, 67 IBUs
Worked.
The Midnight Coterie of Sinister Intruders
Double Chocolate Stout|8.6%|45 IBU
In this new vision of horror like you’ve never seen before, comes a stout so decadent, twee and rich that will surely murder you. In the face of unspeakable evil, this beer was aged on 5#/bbl of organic, fair trade cocoa nibs sourced via the Democratic Republic of Congo and roasted by local purveyors, Theo Chocolates. Combined with a hint of lactose, there’s no way the Constable or your two precocious children can fend off a beer this ludicrously lugubrious, especially if it’s accompanied by a meat cleaver, a falcon, a record player, Danny Glover, and twins in tracksuits. Wes Anderson has nothing on us in this ale of handmade horror.Dear Drinker, can will kill you? - The Brewers.
People Power
Does a human good.
Pale|5.3%|45 IBU
We teamed up with 50+ breweries around the country to release a beer named People Power on the 4th of July. The beer could be any style and use any number of ingredients - the only thing in common is that every brewer must donate 10% of sales of the beer to the ACLU. A diverse array of breweries from near and far all working together for the greater good? Sign us up! As for the beer, this pale ale is light, dry and crisp, and hopped with Citra and Experimental 638, resulting in layers upon layers of tropical and citrus flavors and aromatics.
More info at peoplepowerbeer.com
5.3% abv, 45 IBUs
Does a human good.
Please Advise IPA
Respectfully Yours.
IPA|7.4%|60 IBU
Dear Sirs and/or Madams,
We are seeking information as to what type of IPA you typically manufacture. You see, at first glance they tend to appear hazy - though we admit, that haze varies in prevalence from batch to batch, presumably at the decision of your brewers. Regardless, this haze is most often misleading - because your IPAs have a noticeable bitterness (how dare you!?) and they finish quite dry, even snappy. The flavour and aromatic profiles are often quite fruity - albeit with the occasional floral or piney highlight, and another note that some would describe as “dank.” Either way, there’s very little malt and/or cereal presence, another confusing facet that’s cause for inquiry. And thus, we ask for a clarification, per se, as to what style of IPA is that you consider yourselves. Surely, we don’t want to assume you are constantly missing the mark in trying to create a West Coast IPA and/or a Northwest IPA and/or a New England IPA. We don’t get it. But we like it. Please Advise.
Respectfully,
Person In Line to Order, Phone in Hand, Untappd App Open
TL,DR: 70% 2-Row, 30% Pilsner Malt. 60% Mosaic pellets & cryo, 25% Hallertau Blanc, 15% Citra. 15.8P to 2.7P
7.4% abv, 60 IBUs
Respectfully Yours.
Pyramid Scheme
Dreamed & Schemed.
Dad Beer|5.4%|30 IBU
Hello. We’d love to tell you about an amazing opportunity to drink this beer and makes lots of money. First, buy in on a pint - mmm, it’s delicious, isn’t it?! LOADS of bright Apricot combined upon a creamy wheat malt bill with a tart, crisp finish. Then, you need to enroll other people to drink this beer as well. The more people you get to drink this beer, the higher rate of return you’ll get it. Makes sense, right? And THEN, you need those drinkers to enlist more drinkers - spread the word, drink the beer, we all get rich! Trust us, nobody will get sued or sent a cease and desist by a once-locally-owned-now-corporate brewery of a similar name with a similar flagship we’re paying tribute to. This thing will go on forever!
5.4% abv, 30 IBUs
Dreamed & Schemed.
The Ghost of Great Owl
RIP Pumpkin Beer.
Dark Stuff|6.3%|27 IBU
Gather round children for a story of dread and delight, about an owl and a pumpkin on a terrible night. There was a day, way back when, when pumpkin beer was “it.” A festival was born - joyous and raucous, overflowing with wit. Great Pumpkin and Night Owl filled everyone’s glasses, as the people would cheer “Pumpkin beers for the masses!” But then one dreadful year, everything was changed - a soul sold to the devil, never to be the same. Pumpkin beer was dead, a hollow shell. Alone and rotting, banished to hell. In memory of times past, enjoy this spiced pumpkin beer while it lasts.
6.3% abv, 27 IBUs
RIP Pumpkin Beer.
Verse Chorus Verse IPA
Did it make you happy?
IPA|7.3%|63 IBU
We brew the IPA. You drink the IPA. And you’ll think you’re happy. We make another IPA. You drink another IPA. And it will make us happy. We’re going back to our roots on this one and bringing back a fan favorite - with lots of tropical and citrus notes from a blend of our two favorite hops - Citra and Mosaic - plus a little El Dorado. Feels so good to feel again.
7.3% abv, 63 IBUs
Did it make you happy?
Surfer on Acid IPA
Surf was up.
IPA|7.1%|58 IBU
Sometimes you just need a cocktail. This isn’t one of those times. But it kinda is, because we put together a hop bill that should...could...taste like one of our favorite tropical cocktails on a cold, grey, soggy Fall day. And that’s how it came to be - Mosaic, Denali, Idaho 7, Citra, Sabro - with notes of pineapple, sweet herbaciousness, a hint of citrus, & a touch of coconut. Breath it in, take a sip, get weird, and catch a wave. Or maybe it’s just in your head.
7.1% abv, 58 IBUs
Surf was up.
Sweater Wetter
All buttoned up!
IPA|7.1%|54 IBU
There’s a chill in the air. The sun is setting earlier and rising later. It’s about time. FINALLY. Sweater Weather. Sweater. Weather. And ya know even though harvest is over, new wet hop beers are still coming out! They just keep on coming! Like this one, with 21#/bbl of Wet Cashmere hops from Cornerstone Ranches. It’s soft and fuzzy and peachy and tropical and citrusy and just delightful. A perfect accompaniment on these Fall days!
7.1% abv, 54 IBUs
All buttoned up!
Resin Raiders
Lost and Found and Lost Again.
IPA|7.3%|60 IBU
Sometimes, in the rarest of circumstances, brewers searching for the wettest, freshest Citra are called upon for a seemingly impossible mission: find the holy grail, conquer the evil kilners, and use wet hops for the greater good. Following that call, we traveled deep into the valley, under the shadow of hops, with our fearless friends from Cellarmaker, in hopes of finding, saving, and using the bestest, wettest Citra in the world. They say these hops have limitless powers, and in the wrong hands, could be the end to all wet hop beers as we know it. Lucky for us (and you), we found what we were searching for at not one, but two farms - Perrault & Loftus Ranches. Fate was with us as we also stumbled across a secret stash of glorious smelling Sabro from Perrault, so we saved a few scores of that as well during our harrowing journey. The end result is a vortex of all encompassing wetness, with Angels of Wetness screaming in fury, melting your face, blowing your head off, and sealing in the wetness for years to come to those who seek it.
7.3% abv, 60 IBUs
Lost and Found and Lost Again.
The Splash Zone
It was wet.
Pale|5.6%|50 IBU
Attention! This pale ale was brewed 24#/bbl of Day 1 Organic Simcoe from Perrault Farms. It is one of the wettest hopped beers we’ve ever brewed. And to top is all off, we also had the Seattle Times follow us around from farm to brewery. Before they entered our worlds, they were warned. Flash photography and video cameras are permitted in most of the areas. However, the brewery and farm are not liable for any damages to phones/cameras/video cameras/tape recorders, nor are they liable for any injuries or complications from excessive wetness; extreme freshness; intense aromatics of ruby red grapefruit, fruity pebbles,and pine needles; distinct vegetal mouthfeel; and crisp, bright finishes resulting in ecstatic, excessive sipping. Enjoy as many as you like at your own risk.
5.6% abv, 50 IBUs
It was wet.
Waterworld
Still searching for dry land...
IPA|7.3%|52 IBU
In a post apocalyptic world far off in the distant future, the earth lies beneath an overgrown mess of hop bines. Dirt is a rare commodity and humans are addicted to hop terpines. Those that survived have adapted to a new world, and travel the earth on top cutters. Little remains of non-brewer civilization. This place, this whole way of hopping, is ending unless we follow the map and discover that mythological place with the wettest, freshest hops in all the world - Yakima Valley. That is not our destination, but our destiny. It’s a world unlike any you have ever seen.
~
545 pounds of first day harvested Wet Amarillo hops from Virgil Gamache Farms
7.3% abv, 52 IBUs
Still searching for dry land...
thank u, next ipa
thought it was the one, but it wasn't a match
IPA|7.1%|65 IBU
Thought we’d end up with Bangerz, but it wasn’t a match. Brewed some named for Kanye, now we sippin’ and laugh. Even almost miss Snoozefest, and for Cool Story we’re thankful. Wish we could say thank you to Slap Bag, ‘cause that beer was an angel. One taught us salts. One taught us dankness. One taught us cryo, now we dialin’ profile. We’ve loved and we’ve lost, but that’s not what we need. So look what you’ve got, a new IPA indeed. This one has Vic Secret. This one has Blanc. This one has Mosaic. Now you’ll sip and taste it. And after this you’ll move on, just like the rest. Just look back briefly, and say “thank you, next.”
7.1% abv, 65 IBUs
thought it was the one, but it wasn't a match
Talk Amongst Yourselves
We Gave you a Topic. It was Discussed.
Double Coffee Stout
Dark Stuff|8.3%|39 IBU
Hello and welcome to this beer. Inspired by our favorite midday program, Coffee Talk with host Linda Richman, we decided to create something special for all the Bubbalas. We started with a roast forward double stout loaded with oats and dark malts and a touch of lactose. Let me tell you, this base beer - it’s so smooth it’s like velvet. But wait there’s more! We then made our own cold brew with beans from Lighthouse Roasters and infused it during conditioning. A dream come true, seriously. If you like stout and you like coffeeee...it might make you emotional. Oy, here we go again. We’re getting choked up. We’re verklempt. We’ll give you a topic: The New Deal was neither new nor a deal. Discuss…..Ok, there it passed. Take a sip now, give a call, we’ll talk, enjoy.
7.2% abv, 39 IBUs
We Gave you a Topic. It was Discussed.
Toothless IPA
Train the Styrian Dragon
IPA|7%|62 IBU
This is a story about young & little known dual purpose hop from Slovenia named Styrian Dragon. There wasn’t much information out there - some said notes of passion fruit, melon, berries, & sweet pepper. We were intrigued. After assessing the raw hop, we decided to add some Citra to anchor some citrusy notes, and then ended up adding an additional touch of Mosaic during the dry-hop just to brighten it up a little. And then this little viking kid adopted a runty dinosaur dragon thing that has no teeth but is quick and ends up saving the day!
7.0% abv, 62 IBUs
Train the Styrian Dragon
Timeskip IPA
Back from the Past.
IPA|6.8%|55 IBU
So we’re drinking an IPA, as we used to call it, and all of the sudden - BAM! - the stuff is light and hazy and soft with a little minerality. Yeah yeah - like some kind of malt bill with 2-row, pilsner, pale wheat, & flaked oats. How? WHY!? We’ll spare you the irrelevant details and quickly develop the story line...But here’s the rub - the hop bill, it’s like that hasn’t changed. Simcoe, Chinook, Amarillo, Cascade, and Centennial. We’re talking heritage hops. Northwest hops. Grapefruit, Pine, Resin...and a dry finish. It’s like when the Present meets the Future meets the Past…
Pshhhwow… mindblown.
6.8% abv, 55 IBUs
Back from the Past.
Zazzle
Frazzled.
DIPA|8.3%|65 IBU
This time around, we decided to go all out on super duper citrus forward hop profile. Like tangerine flesh and orange peel and mandarin leaves and grapefruit pith - but with just hops. So, we loaded the recipe up with Simcoe, Citra, Mandarina, Cascade, and Hop 522, and told them to have at it. The end result is zippy and zesty and pithy and juicy. What does the name mean? We don’t know. It’s just kind of how it tastes. Is this description kind of meh? Yeah, kinda but it’s hard to write about a made up word. We’ll just let the beer do the talking.
8.3% abv, 65 IBUs
Frazzled.
Playing It Safe IPA
Well Played.
IPA|6.7%|58 IBU
We’ve played around a tiny bit with Experimental Hop 638 this past Fall, and we were intrigued by it’s subtle notes of candied citrus, ripe pineapple, lychee, & flowers in bloom. That said, we thought it needed a little familiar boost of something EVERYBODY loves...from a little hop we like to call Citra. The combination pulls Hop 638 in a more rounded, soft citrus profile - with the tropical & floral notes as a balanced undertone. Sometimes we get weird and take risks to unpredictable & often delicious results….but sometimes you just gotta play it safe.
6.7% abv, 58 IBUs
Well Played.
The Others
Existed.
New Zealand Pale Ale
Pale|6%|45 IBU
Hops from New Zealand are awesome and we love them. Nelson Sauvin is fire emoji and Motueka is a complex combination of wood and bitter citrus. But this Pale has NEITHER of them in it. NONE. There’s a whole lotta other hops coming out of New Zealand, that get a lot less love. At our brewery, we call them “the others”. So we made a crisp little pale with WAIMEA, RAKAU, & MOUTERE to see what they can do. The end result are pleasant notes of sweet citrus, lemongrass, & fresh cut flowers. Subtle, fruity, floral, delicious...let us show you New Zealand.
6.0% abv, 45 IBUs
Existed.
When It’s Time To Party We Will Party Hard
Partied Out.
IPA|7%|57 IBU
You work all night, and when you work, you don’t feel all right. What’s up with that? And what’s up with rules? We will never listen to your rules. We will never do what others do. Do what we want, and we get it from you. Do what we like and we like what we do. So let’s get a party going, let’s get a party going, when it’s time to party we will party hard, party hard. Which is easy to do with this dangerously crushable, super tropical, hazy and dry IPA loaded with Galaxy, Mosaic, Simcoe & Citra.
7.0% abv, 57 IBUs
Partied Out.
Yuzu Illusion
American Wheat with Yuzu Juice
Dad Beer|4.2%|43 IBU
We took our pretty little wheat beer and upped the refreshment by adding some Japanese Yuzu juice. Did you just work out real hard to Guns n’ Roses and are now craving some lemony limey sports drink? Well this is better than that. You know what they say about muscles….yuzu them or lose them!
4.2% abv, 43 IBUs
Speed Of Change
Antiquated.
DIPA|8.2%|65 IBU
We live in extraordinary times. In this brave new age and era, changes in beer are occurring at lightning fast rates - arising simultaneously, accelerating quickly - resulting in unprecedented possibilities. We are transforming the way we do business: learning, adapting, responding, innovating. We must embrace change, and lean into it - survival hinges upon optimization, opportunity, and evolution while navigating a complex market of uncertainty. It is a daunting and exhilarating synergistic tightrope of…
HA! What the FUCK are we talking about?!
~~~~~
Enjoy this iteration of hoppy evolution - a backbone of the classics (centennial, chinook, cascade) propping up a huge dose of a newish variety (Idaho 7) over a light blend of 2 Row, Pilsner and White Wheat Malt - that results in notes of doug fir, grapefruit peel, pineapple flesh, and blackberry.
8.2% abv, 65 IBUs
Antiquated.
Zesta Fresca
Double IPA w/ Fresh Grapefruit Zest & Hibiscus
DIPA|8.2%|65 IBU
We took our Cult Favorite and made it even cultier - infusing it with fresh zested grapefruit peel & whole hibiscus flowers. And we did it for a good cause! 100% of proceeds from this beer will be donated to the Keep A Breast Foundation - a youth-focused breast cancer awareness non-profit.
8.2% abv, 65 IBUs
Turn Down For What
Okayyyyyyy.
DIPA|8.1%|68 IBU
FIRE UP THE LOUD! ANOTHER ROUND OF HOPS! HOPS HOPS EVERYBODY HOPS.
More specifically, Strata and Citra hops. WHAT.
Upon a base of Rahr 2 Row and Weyermann Carafoam. WHAT.
With big notes of sweet tangerine, papaya, passion fruit, and green strawberries. YEAHHHHH!
8.1% abv, 68 IBUs
Okayyyyyyy.
Really Solid Amazing Liquid IPA
So good it sold out.
IPA|6.8%|55 IBU
You know what’s so fantastic and awesome about selling out to Big Beer? No no no, not the massive bank account. It’s that they just GET us. They are super supportive and want to elevate our already great product to the next level. They truly want to get our commodity into as many mouths as possible - efficiently and cost effectively - all for YOU, the CONSUMER! My God, they love consumers. They recognize in this current product culture that patience is decreasing and memory is fleeting, from baby boomers to millenials, and they can deliver on that with a smile! Live in the NOW and minimize FOMO, amiright?! Haha. In this great big world, beer is just another liquid, and liquids are just another business. Drink what you like, it doesn’t matter - we’re all friends and we’re all the same. Life’s too short to worry about the “people” behind the liquid, the “stories” and “ownership structure” of the business, the “location” where the liquid is made, the “scales of economies” and “vertical integration” of the liquid ingredients, and the “distribution” of the liquid to people consumers like you.
….
Beer is just Liquid? FUCK. YOU.
Simcoe, Mosaic, & Amarillo
6.8% abv, 55 IBUs
So good it sold out.
Who Saved Who
Equal Parts Saved.
DIPA|8.2%|60 IBU
Citra is truly in its prime right now. This past harvest, it surpassed Cascade as the most planted hop variety in the US - with over 6,500 acres strung! It hits all the juicy citrus and soft fruity notes - tangerine, red grapefruit, peach, mango - while coming off smooth, approachable and pleasant. Can it get any better?! Is this the TOP? Wait...is it all downhill from here? Maybe Citra needs a lil’ buddy to keep it interesting….That’s where Experimental Hop 630 comes in. This new hop also exhibits soft, smooth notes of fruit - a little citrus, a little raspberry, a little pineapple - but not in an overpowering way. So, we decided to pair the two hops together - in equal parts, all the way through. Citra is at the pinnacle of its career, but maybe Experimental Hop 630 is next. Only time will tell, but their coexistence in this beer makes them both better.
8.2% abv, 60 IBUs
Equal Parts Saved.
Ixnay on the Islay
Eerschay otay Iskeywhay andway Outstay
Multi-Barrel Aged Stout
Fancy Beer|11.8%|68 IBU
One Westland American Oak Single Malt Whiskey Barrel. One Westland Peated Single Malt Barrel. Both cold aging the same Imperial Stout base beer for 11 months, and then blended together for balance. Smoke, dark chocolate, and dried fruit aromas give way to vanilla, milk chocolate, and brown sugar flavors all wrapped up in a warming, woody finish. Eerschay otay Iskeywhay andway Outstay!
11.8% abv, 68 IBUs
Eerschay otay Iskeywhay andway Outstay
Tropical Timeshare
Exclusions have applied.
DIPA|8.3%|65 IBU
Aloha! We’d like to interest you in a slightly boozy, fruit forward elixir that will sweep you away to a happy a place. Yes, dreams DO come true. It can all be yours! Like, right now! But you’ll need to hurry, as we already have multiple parties signed up for this screaming deal - like Mosaic! And, Idaho 7! Also, Denali! We know, we know - they are super tropical friends already, always smelling like pineapple, passion fruit, mango & marijuana cigarettes - but it’s vacation, ya know!? And YOU can join them in paradise! SIGN ON TODAY.
For a limited time only. Tropical Timeshare might not actually exist. Consumption may result in a forfeiture of product. Other restrictions may apply.
8.3% abv, 65 IBUs
Exclusions have applied.
Patagrungia IPA
Rainy Apres Over
Hazy IPA Collaboration with Outer Range Brewing (CO)
IPA|7.2%|48 IBU
When two like-minded ambassadors of the haze prerogative combine aesthetics, the end result is not unlike a lightweight, moisture wicking fabric soft against the tattooed skin of a laborer. Pilsner, Golden Promise, Wheat, Oats, Rye & Vienna malt fit together like tailored wool seams upon a sandstone backdrop, while GrÜngeist hops interwoven with Mosaic & Citra create an all purpose, multi-functioning blanket of yellow peaches, white grape, pineapple & tangelos. All in all, it’s really just a broken-in pint of athletic-cut, casual flannel flair that will keep you cool when it’s hot, dry when it’s wet, and poppy when it’s sludge.
7.2% abv, 48 IBUs
Rainy Apres Over
People You May Know
Blocked.
DIPA|8.7%|68 IBU
Your friends are waiting. Just give us access to all your personal information and we will gladly connect you! To your Friends. Suggestions:
Rahr 2 Row 271 Mutual Beers
Simcoe Hops 52 Mutual Beers
Galaxy Hops 28 Mutual Beers
Strata Hops 5 Mutual Beers
Add a Friend. Make a Memory. Get Notifications. Like. Comment. What’s on your mind?
8.7% abv, 68 IBUs
Blocked.
The Games We Play IPA
Played out.
IPA|7.1%|60 IBU
This ain’t a wave or phase, ‘cause all that shit fades,
This lifestyle’s forever when you IPA
Mosaic, Moutere, Waimea here to slay
The love just accentuates the hate
These are the games we play, we are the hops they say.
These are the brews your ex-brewers claim they made.
7.1% abv, 60 IBUs
Played out.
Straight to Voicemail IPA
Leave a Message at the Beeeeeep.
IPA|7%|65 IBU
This ain’t a wave or phase, ‘cause all that shit fades,
This lifestyle’s forever when you IPA
Mosaic, Moutere, Waimea here to slay
The love just accentuates the hate
These are the games we play, we are the hops they say.
These are the brews your ex-brewers claim they made.
7.1% abv, 60 IBUs
Leave a Message at the Beeeeeep.
Record Scratch
Errrrvvvvppp!
Experimental Pale Ale
Pale|6.2%|45 IBU
WTF why’d the music stop?!? Because we need you to focus, and we want it to be in a dramatic yet casual fashion.This pale ale is all about Experimental Hop 692 - one of the most promising new hops coming out of Select Botanicals/Yakima Chief Ranches. It’s related to Sabro - but with brighter tropical notes. Like papaya, key lime, mango, passion fruit, and coconut flesh. It’s pretty fucking cool, so keep an eye on it! Ok, turn the music back on, I think we’re done here.
6.2% abv, 45 IBUs
Errrrvvvvppp!
Pozor!
Ahoj!
Traditional Czech Pilsner
Lager Beer|5.5%|42 IBU
Attention! Attention! Pilsners are getting more and more of it lately! This past Spring, Steve took a trip to the Czech Republic with one mission in mind - find, study, and drink as many and as much Czech Pils as possible. Thus, creating one upon his return was inevitable. Weyermann Floor Malted Bohemian PIlsner malt from Morovia sets the base with a subtle, biscuity nuance. It was then bittered with CZ Special Saaz (Saaz with a slightly higher alpha) and finished with (regular?) CZ Saaz for deep notes of lemon peel, fresh cut grass, and spice along with a snappy, bitter finish. We hope you enjoy it as much as we do - Na zdraví!
5.5% abv, 42 IBUs
Ahoj!
The Wet Classic
Gone in 300 miles.
Wet Cascade IPA
IPA|6.5%|60 IBU
For our first IPA of harvest, we found ourselves in Granger at Shinn & Son Farms, in a kiln that smelled like the freshest Sierra Nevada pale ale you’ve never had. Cascade is often overlooked in today’s fast moving brewing scene, even if that scene wouldn’t exist without the beers built on that hop. In tribute of the hop that created an industry, we used 23#/bbl of Cascade in this rendition, giving big notes of grapefruit, pine needles, beach grass & marmalade. It’s OG, it’s familiar, it’s classy, it’s wet, it’s classic.
6.5% abv, 60 IBUs
Gone in 300 miles.
Too Many Grams Per Liter
Converted to Pounds Per Barrel
Wet Ekuanot & Wet Chinook IPA
IPA|7%|60 IBU
OLA! This is the LAST FRESH HOP brew of the season for us. So, we decided to bring in an international brewer - Narcose of Brazil - to share in the gospel of all that is harvest and fresh hop. We decided to grab two varieties from two farms - Ekuanot from Carpenter Ranches in Granger and Chinook from Cornerstone Ranches in Toppenish. Narcose was amazed at the sheer volume of hops we were using - 255 pounds total at 17#/bbl - but in almost every other country than the USA, they don’t use pounds to weigh anything. Nor do they use barrels. Because ‘Murica is gonna ‘Murica. In the rest of the world, they use grams and they use liters. The math comes out to roughly 65 grams per Liter on this beer...if you care. And that’s just too much.
7.0% abv, 60 IBUs
Converted to Pounds Per Barrel
You Can’t Fire Me I Quit
What was THAT about?!
DIPA|8.1%|68 IBU
Every time we play around with new hops and combinations, a few of you mention ex-beers and how awesome they were and that you wish we’d make them again. AND THIS TIME WE DID. We thought it was done, gone forever, over and out. It practically burnt the brewery down as it left. But here it is, asking to be brewed again - with all the choicest Citra and Mosaic hops in the cooler. And let’s not forget about the underrated third hop on the bill - Hallertau Blanc - that gives it a little concord grape twist. You walked away, we moved on, wounds heal…don’t make us regret brewing you again, ok?
8.1% abv, 68 IBUs
What was THAT about?!
Pumpkin Beer Still Sucks
Who sucked out the feeling?!
Oatmeal Stout with Pumpkin & Spices
Dad Beer|5.6%|38 IBU
Pumpkin Beer is part of our proud brewing lineage - Steve & Zach spent years making new & old pumpkin beer recipes every Fall. But it also reminds us of our ex, who sold out to AB-Inbev despite having other viable options to keep the brewery they created independently owned. Despite this style’s decline, it’s only fair to offer a deliciously spiced pumpkin beer from a small, local craft brewery with the priorities of being adamantly small and forever independent. We might be in the shadow of the brewery that made pumpkin beer a “thing”, but let’s be honest: Corporate beer still sucks.
5.6% abv, 38 IBUs
Who sucked out the feeling?!
The Essence of Beauty
Died in a freak gasoline fight.
Wet Mosaic IPA
IPA|6.7%|50 IBU
One time, several harvests ago, we brewed a beer called “The Essence of Wetness.” This beer is the sequel, just like Zoolander 2. Except this version is better than the original, because Zoolander 2 was pretty meh. And yes, The Essence of Wetness was a fabulous beer…but we’ve gotten better at making beer since then. Thus, we strutted all the way to Toppenish to pick up beautiful Mosaic from Perrault Farms, turned left (!), and promptly drove back (with a stop at the Ellensburg Starbucks for Orange Mocha Frappucinnos, obvs.) At 22#/bbl, this is certainly not a wet hop beer for ants. They say there’s more to life than just being really, really, ridiculously good at wet hopping. We’ll believe it when we see it.
6.7% abv, 50 IBUs
Died in a freak gasoline fight.
To Be Frank
Zapped
Wet Zappa IPA
IPA|6.9%|65 IBU
Frankly, we are not familiar with Frank Zappa’s music catalog. Nor are we very familiar with this Zappa hop variety. All we know is that our friends at CLS Farms grow phenomenal hops. And that this hop is new. And also, of the wild Neomexicanus origin. Aaaand that it smells and tastes very tropical - with notes of pineapple, key lime, mango, and spice. We consider ourselves lucky to be able to brew with it, as this is the only fresh hop version in the world that currently exists. Get to know this hop. And this music. But let’s focus on this hop first.
6.9% abv, 65 IBUs
Zapped
Yakima Caviar
Treated Ourselves.
Wet Citra IPA
IPA|6.8%|50 IBU
Ya see this beer right here is what we call the premium grade AAA rate and fancy luxury. Consider yourself lucky to even come across one, let alone buy one. It’s just that much of treat. Loftus Ranches This hop right here, this is the cream of the crop. It elevates everything it touches - we’re talking next level elegance and decorum. Beautiful green pearls of ripe peach, tangerine, & mango that capture your attention and invigorate the senses. Oh the balance - that silky mouthfeel and leafy finish to show you that green truly can be graceful. Citra is a brewer’s best friend. And these precious 536 pounds came from our friends at Loftus Ranches in Moxee, WA. Diamonds are forever, wet hops are for now - treat yourself. You deserve it.
6.8% abv, 50 IBUs
Treated Ourselves.
Sparkle & Fade
We are still living with your ghost.
Wet Amarillo Pale
Pale|5.9%|50 IBU
We are still living with your ghost. Lonely and dreaming of those early years of Amarillo - in all it’s orange creamsicle glory. Over the last few years, we’ve seen some glimmers of the hop we fell in love with, and a majority of these lots have been coming out of Oregon. So we drove down to our friends at Crosby Farms in Woodbridge and picked up 300 pounds (20#/bbl) for this pretty little pale. It’s a crusher that’ll make you want to live beside the picker, leave the kiln behind, walk out past the dribbles, and leave the world behind.
5.9% abv, 50 IBUs
We are still living with your ghost.
Talk and Not Talk IPA
We can still find things to not talk about.
IPA|7.2%|65 IBU
Idaho 7, Mosaic, Citra & Centennial all have this amazing relationship and it’s very physical, they still push each other’s buttons. People say ‘oh they’re so much hoppier than other hops’ and you know what, they are! We’re the one having to push them away. These hops have a lot in common - tropical notes, citrus notes, piney notes. They all grow outdoors. They could not talk and talk for forever and still find things to not talk about. So sit down, have a few, and go meet somebody at Starbucks. Just not the same Starbucks. And bring your J.Crew catalog.
7.2% abv, 65 IBUs
We can still find things to not talk about.
Party of Five
It's now closer to free.
DIPA|8.1%|65 IBU
This is a beer about a family of hops. With no Mom and Dad around - Citra, Cashmere, Huell Melon, Mosaic, & Sabro - have to learn to work together, often in an overly dramatic fashion. Did Citra get distracted by how pretty they smell and crash their car into a field of barley? Cashmere is there to help, and keep things light. Is Huell Melon having trouble in paradise? Then Mosaic has its back, and a funky couch to sleep on. And why does Sabro always have to make itself known? It’s like, “OK Sabro. We get it. You’re in this beer too. We taste you. Thanks.” Every sip is passion, conflict, plot twist, coma(?!), resolution, and an off-site family vacation finale. Everybody wants to live, love, and be...closer to free.
8.1% abv, 65 IBUs
It's now closer to free.
Thank You For Sharing
TIPA|10.2%|69 IBU
Thanksgiving is just around the corner. Then comes Christmas. That means FAMILY TIME. Which is fun...sometimes...in small doses. Just like this beer. It’s hopped mostly with Mosaic and then we used a cast of characters to round out some juicy, fruit forward notes - Centennial in the kettle, Simcoe Cryo powder during fermentation, Hop 638, Idaho 7, & Citra throughout and finished it off with some extra Mosaic Cryo. The more you sip, the more familial interactions become bearable, the more you can handle awkward conversation, and the warmer and/or indifferent you become. So when your fiscally conservative yet always asking for money drunk Uncle gives his unsolicited opinions on millennial’s work ethic, the global warming hoax, and how inconvenient PC culture is, all while insisting that he’s not racist BUT….you can just take in a large sip and respond with “Thank You For Sharing”....or “OK Boomer”...or “Get Fucked.”
10.2% abv, 69 IBUs
World Premiere
American Pale Ale
Pale|5.4%|45 IBU
We have an announcement to make. This beer right here, tastes nothing like anything you’ve ever tasted before. Not even close. And it’s all because of these cutting edge, innovative American hops called….CASCADE. Ever heard of them? Didn’t think so. They’ve got these big notes of lemon flesh, pine needles, grapefruit, & black tea. And we laid them over a malt bill of pale and medium crystal malt for a copper hue with subtle notes of caramel and bread crust that EVERYBODY loves in their beer. Or, will love, once your pallets evolve. Heck, maybe someday, a beer like this will jump start an industry, creating millions of US jobs, generating billions of dollars in revenue, all while the evolution of said industry leaves this recipe behind as the snowballing demand for “GIMME something NEW!” swallows it whole. WHAT. It could happen!!!
5.4% abv, 45 IBUs
Show Your Work IPA
IPA|7.2%|64 IBU
Look at us! We’ve jumped to the conclusion and correctly made an IPA. But how did we get here? Well, like a good student, we’re going to break it down and document our thinking.
Ok let’s start with alcohol. 14.6 OG - 2.0 TG = 12.6 x .57 = 7.182 rounded up to 7.2%
Malt Flavor? Ha. Um. No thanks! Let’s keep it light and neutral - Rahr 2 Row, Weyermann Pils, Carafoam, & Acidulated.
Water...a pinch of Gypsum, a little CaCl, splash of Phosphoric Acid, squirt of Lactic Acid...ok we’re bored.
HOPS. Our FAVORITE! Bitterness? Present but pleasant. Now let’s go to flavortown. Since it’s wet and dark and gloomy, we’re going tropical. On the hot side let’s do 46% Azacca, 31% Mosaic, & 23% Hallertua Blanc - all to the total of 1.5#/bbl. Then, DRY HOP! 57% Mosaic, 29% Hallertua Blanc, and 14% Azacca - because that’ll just pop of pineapple, papaya, & passion fruit at a total of 3#/bbl.
Hmm, what other factors. Finings? = 0 Yeast? Our house A30. Temp? 68F. Time? 20 days, like clockwork.
Ok we’re pretty much done. Time to Double Check. Take a sip. Mmm. NOW GIVE US A FUCKING GOLD STAR.
7.2% abv, 64 IBUs
This Is A Dramatization
Purely Coincidental.
Bourbon Barrel Aged Imperial Stout
Fancy Beer|9.5%|50 IBU
What you are about to taste is by no means an actual representation of a typical beer. Any similarity or resemblance to other beers, past or present, is merely coincidental. Due to the 13 month residence inside Elijah Craig bourbon barrels, the following flavors, aromas, mouthfeel, and finish have been altered to depict a realistic situation, intentional of origin. The following beer contains notes of brown sugar, espresso, charred oak, & Kentucky’s finest - due to its explicit content, it should only be consumed by experts. Drinker discretion advised.
9.5% abv, 50 IBUs
Purely Coincidental.
Party In The USA
We played your song.
IPA|7.2%|53 IBU
We are FOUR YEARS OLD. And, we couldn’t believe this beer name was available. So we made a beer with Miley, er, listening to Miley, that’s got some red & white wheat in the base and hopped with USA hops! Ok, some USA hops...well, mostly an Australian hop. It’s hopped with Galaxy, Strata, Citra, & Simcoe. And while the USA isn’t currently at it’s most esteemed place in history…you know, because of treasonous acts, sham tax breaks, locking immigrant children in death camps, attacking women’s bodies, incubating hate groups, thwarting universal healthcare, cutting education budgets….ok, OK. We told ourselves we’d keep this positive. It’s our F’N BIRTHDAY! Remember how fun the 4th of July is?! Especially when Obama was president?! YEAH! Get in that head space, and just put your hands up, we’re playing your song, you know we’re gonna be okay. It’s a Party in the USA. At Cloudburst. In January. In 2020.
7.2% abv, 53 IBUs
We played your song.
Regression to the Mean
Average at best.
American Pale Ale
Pale|6.1%|48 IBU
Um, we have a question. Well, we have lots of questions. But let’s start with this one: Why do pale ales have such perceived low ceilings? It’s like they are at a disadvantage in drinkers minds for the very essence of their existence. It’s as if that since they are not as hoppy or as strong as an IPA, you can’t like them as much as an IPA, and they certainly can’t be as good as an IPA. And therein lies the issue - the comparison to a bigger, more flavorful yet similar style - when the standards should be clearly separated in the drinkers the mind. Pale’s are their OWN THING! They are clean, simple, nuanced, bright, dry, and balanced. They are sessionable, beautiful, interesting, and challenge you to search for, and think about, their milder yet still expressive attributes. Take this beer for instance! You’ve got limey and piney Comet hops from Shinn & Son farms, paired with grapefruit forward Simcoe hops from Loftus Ranches. Those flavors continue to meld, new notes constantly presenting themselves with every next sip, as you ponder how it evolves from your first pint to your second. Isn’t that cool? Yep. 3 caps.
6.1% abv, 48 IBUs
Average at best.
Two Scoops
Empty bowl
Toasted Brown Ale with Cinnamon & Raisins
Toasted Brown Ale with Cinnamon & Raisins|5.7%|18 IBU
Back by semi-popular vote! This beer was first brewed roughly three years ago - which was, believe it or not, BEFORE most brewers started adding actual cereal and artificial flavoring when making these types of things. Toasted Oats and a blend of Kilned Malts produce that fond taste of bran & brown sugar. Throw in sixty pounds of raisins and a touch of cinnamon - and all you need is a cereal box to stare at while you dribble this beer down your chin.
5.7% abv, 18 IBUs
Empty bowl
That’s Haute IPA
You guys!?!
IPA|6.6%|55 IBU
This past harvest, we were privy to taste an IPA at the Haas Innovation Brewery with a new hop called BRU-1, grown exclusively at Brulotte farms in Toppenish. And IT. WAS. STRIKING. There were bright notes of ripe pineapple and papaya, with a touch of eucalyptus & green tea. It was fresh, it was cool, it was elegant, and it was modern. We HAD to have it. We NEEDED to have it. So we went full blown Donatella Versace on a few brokers...and then we got it. In peak fashion, we added some Citra to it, just to round it out. The end result is most vogueish - with notes of pineapple, watermelon, & white peach. Mmmm. That’s Haute.
6.6% abv, 55 IBUs
You guys!?!
We Need To Talk
Talked it Out.
DIPA|8.6%|65 IBU
Hi. Hey. Do you have a minute? Ok. So, we want to start out by saying we really appreciate the effort - because we know it comes from a good place. I mean, you started a thing and paved the road for us to make beers like this. It’s just...you’ve become kind of aggressively bitter. And you’re so heated - like the higher alcohols are stinging our nostrils. We just want some balance, ya know? Like you can be all about the hops, but the hops aren’t EVERYTHING. I mean, they’re IMPORTANT - but so is your malt bill, your yeast, your fermentation. A harmonious, drinkable life. And not we’re leaving you for the next pretty young thing - with their lactose and their 40% Oats and their fruit addition post-fermentation. We think they’re idiots too. It’s time for self care and a DIPA we want to drink. New Year, New Me, New Mosaic, New Comet. 8.6% abv, 65 IBUs
Talked it Out.
Sounds Familiar IPA
Stuck in our head.
IPA|7.2%|55 IBU
You know when you hear a song on the radio that has a familiar hook, or a recycled chorus, or maybe a brief sample? And you’re like, I know I’ve heard that before but I can’t place it because I listen to so much music ALL the time? Well a similar thing happens every once in a while while we’re writing IPA recipes. With hundreds of IPA brews under our belt, and only a couple dozens of hop varieties - sometimes we just gravitate towards a similar combo. And most times we realize this, and make some changes prior to brewing. But in rare times, the deja vu element doesn’t kick in until later...and that’s when we tweak that dry-hop. Hallertau Blanc and Vic Secret are a natural pairing - white wine and white grapefruit along with some passionfruit and pith. We’ve done this before a few times, but we tend to push and pull it with a third hop - like Citra. And….fuck we did that already. So in goes some Mosaic Cryo as well. We also kinda did that already too! BUT - not all together so….voila! Delicious NEW IPA!
7.2% abv, 55 IBUs
Stuck in our head.
Snoozefest IPA
Zzzzz.
IPA|7.2%|53 IBU
We love Citra. You love Citra. Citra is life. But JUST Citra? We don’t know about that. In our egregious opinion, single hop beers tend to be kinda boring and one dimensional - that’s why we’ve never made one. UNTIL WE MADE THIS ONE. AGAIN. And yes, it comes with the same twist. We used 7 different types of Citra hops - that came from 5ish separate farms over three different crop years, and was processed in 2 different ways (T-90 & Cryo) and packaged at 3 different facilities. And guess what?! It’s not that boring! It’s kinda interesting! If you snooze, you win? 7.2% abv, 53 IBUs
Zzzzz.
Treading Water IPA
IPA|7.4%|65 IBU
Welp, we didn’t see this coming in February. How can you even plan for something like this? You CAN’T. Like many of our brewery, bar, & restaurant family - we are doing what we can to survive. Some have already closed their doors for good, others have closed temporarily...for now. And with no direction or current initiatives on the Federal level (#fucktrump), small businesses are forced to adapt daily, with zero guidance of what the next day may hold, and having to make endless difficult financial & moral decisions. It feels like we are all just treading water for the time being. Will a ship pass? Will it see us? Will the current push us to land? How long can we keep this up? In the meantime, our tanks are full and we have fresh beer to move. Like this tropical IPA brewed with Pale & Pilsner malt and a splash of Red Wheat, and then generously hopped with Mosaic, El Dorado, & Azacca. A sincere thank you to everyone who has shown their support, which has allowed us to keep our heads above water.
7.4% abv, 65 IBUs
Tone It Down
American Pale Ale
Pale|6.2%|50 IBU
Often times, we use pale ales to explore new hop varieties or hop combinations or unfamiliar flavor profiles. This is not one of those times. This time, we used a hop combination of Simcoe, Citra, & Idaho 7, one you could typically find in one of IPAs, but then we just...toned it down. We were up here (hand gesture about neck high) and then we just took it down here (hand gesture about waste high). We know how these hops, they play nice together, let’s drop it low and see what subtleties and nuances come to the forefront. We get citrus peel, pineapple, & spruce tips, all wrapped up in a light, quenchable package. Sometimes you just gotta SHUSHHHHHHH!
6.2% abv, 50 IBUs
Wetsahhhhh’ Bro?!?
Fresh 'sho.
Frozen Fresh Hop IPA
IPA|7.1%|63 IBU
What’s better than Sponsored Content? Um, basically nothing...UNLESS YOU INFUSE IT WITH FROZEN, WET, UNKILNED, GREEN SABRO HOPS from last year's harvest.
7.1% abv, 63 IBUs
Fresh 'sho.
Sponsored Content IPA
Contract Expired.
IPA|7.1%|60 IBU
What you are about to read is an unpaid endorsement...We have an EXCITING new IPA to tell you about. It was brewed with our 2019 HAND SELECTED lots of Mosaic, Simcoe, Sabro, & Citra from Yakima Chief by way of Loftus, Tributary & Perrault Farms. The tropical notes of Pineapple, Mango, Key Lime, & Coconut are $$$! And with a base malt blend of Rahr 2-Row and Simpsons Golden Promise, who wouldn’t want to try this delicious LIQUID BEVY BREW SUDS! It’s like it’s an advertisement for Yakima Chief Hops - but they don’t even know we did this! Haha, isn’t that cRaZy?! We don’t even get paid for this! We CANNOT be bought! TRUST US. Wait a minute….could we get paid for this??
7.1% abv, 60 IBUs
Contract Expired.
Some Space
DIPA|8.8%|65 IBU
Everybody is all like asking for some space right now, and that’s good! Social distancing is SAVING LIVES. Keep six feet apart in public. Even at home - the cats, the dogs, your significant other, your roommate - you’re mandated to be in tight quarters and do nothing...SOME SPACE WOULD BE NICE. Thus, we give you...SOME SPACE. And it comes packing the heat loaded with Strata, Citra, & Chinook hops, allowing you to unwind, stretch out, and take a breather. You want some space? This is some space. Enjoy it while you have it!
8.8% abv, 65 IBUs
OK But Just This Once IPA
IPA|6.8%|55 IBU
CANS!? Nah. We don’t need em. They are so much more work. And a pain in the butt. We like kegs. Kegs are great……..Oh, bars and restaurants are closed? WHAT?! I mean, yes, they should be. But that’s 75% of our business right there. How are we going to sell beer? If we can’t sell beer, we can’t make beer. And making beer is why we’re doing this! Hmm, welp…CANS IS THE PLAN.
~~~
Mosaic, Amarillo, Simcoe & Chinook.
Notes of Ruby Red Grapefruit, Pineapple, & Emergen-C.
6.8% abv, 55 IBUs
Cool Story IPA
And then we found $20.
IPA|6.8%|58 IBU
...so we were brewing an IPA last week, and were thinking about bringing back an older recipe that we liked, maybe the one that once needed a name when it was already in the tanks and was scheduled to be racked out. We hemmed and hawed, looked back in the archives, and pulled it out. It seemed solid enough. And then Noah came in with new cans of paint, to touch up some old tap handles that were once broken and needed reinforcing because they aren’t designed to actually be tap handles - they’re umbrella handles - and people tend to pull those taps too hard. Sometimes on Mondays the trash doesn’t get picked up, and it’s annoying because like, they have ONE job and where the hell are they anyway?! We also realized our pallet jack battery was low, so we made a reminder to ourselves to charge it at the end of the day but we still forgot to…
Citra, Motueka, Loral, & Loral Cryo.
7.2% abv, 51 IBUs
GUY! This beer is WICKED PISSAH DUNKIES SISTAH. You can drink beer AND coffee with natural flavors from actual ingredients. Why’s it taste like coffee? ‘Cause we made our own cold brew with Lighthouse Roaster’s Captain Bert’s blend and INJECTED THAT SHIT IN. How’d we get the VAHNILLAH beans in there? We fuckin’ smushed ‘em and THREW ‘EM THE FACK IN. What’s those other flavors? MALT, BABY - and a lot of it - from Carafa to Roasted Barley to Chocolate Malt and some other ones. Plus, some extra milk sugar. Gotta have me some CREAM.
AND THEN we took Gronk's lead and charged into the endzone with cocoa nibs from Theo Chocolates. They say America runs on Dunkin’, but when the runnin’ stops - TURN TO Fuckin’....MOCHANUTS!
6.9% abv, 38 IBUs
That’s Bolshevik!
Baltic Porter
Baltic Porter|8.9%|38 IBU
You know what beer style is often forgotten, always under-rated, and rarely seen on tap lists far & near? Baltic Porter.
You know what beer style is rich & decadent, yet smooth and incredibly drinkable despite the high alcohol due to a long, cold fermentation? Baltic Porter.
You know what beer originated in Eastern Europe, where a revolution for the working class sparked a….ok, well, yes. It didn’t end well. Right, yeah - let’s not talk about that. Let’s talk about Baltic Porter! This beer was on our dream board for years. It took 9 weeks from brew to rack.
8.9% abv, 38 IBUs
Age Appropriate
Respectfully Matured.
Retro IPA
IPA|6.8%|60 IBU
We don’t think you’re mature enough to handle this beer. And that’s fine. With age comes experience, grace, perspective, patience (maybe), and like, lots of other stuff you just wouldn’t understand. Sure, other IPAs are more fun - they seem carefree, green, full of juicy zest and gusto. But this isn’t one of them. Honestly, this can’t even hang with them because if it did, it’d look kinda creepy and get asked things like “Is this juicy IPA your daughter, or….” But here’s the thing: this type of IPA deserves to be here, respected and appreciated, in all it’s Lemony meets Piney meets Earthy meets Floral GLORY. This IPA shakes it’s fist and yells at clouds...just let it do it’s thing.
6.8% abv, 60 IBUs
Respectfully Matured.
Fuckin’ Gonuts
Double Milk Stout w/ Vanilla Beans & Coffee
Dark Stuff|6.9%|38 IBU
GUY! This beer is WICKED PISSAH DUNKIES SISTAH. You can drink beer AND coffee with natural flavors from actual ingredients. Why’s it taste like coffee? ‘Cause we made our own cold brew with Lighthouse Roaster’s Captain Bert’s blend and INJECTED THAT SHIT IN. How’d we get the VAHNILLAH beans in there? We fuckin’ smushed ‘em and THREW ‘EM THE FACK IN. What’s those other flavors? MALT, BABY - and a lot of it - from Carafa to Roasted Barley to Chocolate Malt and some other ones. Plus, some extra milk sugar. Gotta have me some CREAM. They say America runs on Dunkin’, but when the runnin’ stops - TURN TO Fuckin’....GONUTS!
6.9% abv, 38 IBUs
No Mistakes
Just a happy accident.
German-style Schwarzbier
Lager Beer|5.3%|35 IBU
2018 WABA Gold Medal in German Dark Lagers + 2019 SipNW Double Gold. ”There are no mistakes, only happy little accidents” said Bob Ross to the tree. The tree was feeling down about the lopsided, imperfect branches Bob had just painted on them. “Look Bob, I am a tree. I need to be perfect - balanced and mature.” Bob put down his brush and took a sip of his beer, perplexed by the tree’s request. “When you make me, you need to pay extra attention to details. Sure, I look simple and effortless, but I am not some fluxious everchanging mass of atmospheric water particles that you get to paint over and over again. I’m a tree, you get one fucking chance to paint me and that’s it,” the tree explained. Bob took another sip, added a new arsenal of ingredients, and tinkered away at the tree for 7 weeks until it became a black lager that was brewed with a blend of German base malts, a touch of dark crystal, a splash of Carafa Type III and hopped with Magnum and Tettnang. 5.3% abv, 35 IBUs
Just a happy accident.
Frankly, My Dear
We don't give a damn.
American Pale Ale
Pale|6.2%|45 IBU
This is our second ever brew with Zappa hops, a wild neomexicanus variety grown at CLS Farms. And technically, it’s our first brew using them in pellet form. Which is EXCITING. Since this variety is rare and limited, we only had enough to use them in a hop forward pale ale, the perfect vehicle for experimental hops. And we couldn’t help but pair them with a little citra and VOILA! - a timeless classic. We get notes of satsuma, fir, lychee, & lime. We don’t listen to Zappa and we might’ve seen Gone With The Wind in high school (?)...but still, you should give a damn. 6.2% abv, 45 IBUs
We don't give a damn.
And Also With You
Peace Be With You.
Double Dry Irish Catholic Stout
Dark Stuff|7%|30 IBU
Peace be with you. Yes, we’re being serious. What?! No, we’re not trying to get one over on you. We’re not smirking - that’s just our smile! What brew number is this? Why do you ask? It doesn’t mean anything, really. Fine. It was brew #666. Yes, like THE DEVIL, OK! Why does that matter? We’re good people! Maybe even more “Christian” than most, if you look at our beliefs, values and actions. You know, like acceptance of ALL humans. And it’s not like we sweep pedophiles under the rug. YES WE WENT THERE. Get your shit together, the Catholic institution has SO many problems they turn a blind eye towards. How dare US?! No, we don’t feel guilty - YOU FEEL GUILTY! GOD!
Our Father, Who art in heaven…
7.0% abv, 30 IBUs
Peace Be With You.
For Your Consideration IPA
Thoughtfully Considered.
IPA|7%|58 IBU
We, at the academy, have canvassed the hop industry and cross checked this with our cooler, our peers, our customers, and our friends. After much deliberation, ballots were cast, nominees were made, and the winners are: For Lead Actor, Simcoe gives a quiet yet dominant performance with predictable grapefruit and tangerine attributes. And while this work is rock solid, the Lead Actress Idaho 7 truly makes this beer shine thanks to highlights of ripe pineapple and sticky resin. Supporting Actress Centennial offers an anchor to a classic NW profile - an admirable feat. And the winner of Original Screenplay, Hop 692, throws that tradition out the window - with the surprising, impactful notes of tropical fruit and cedar. And of course, none of this could be made possible with the producer (Corporate Ale Yeast) and Director (Rahr 2-Row) - both who tirelessly work behind the scenes and allow all the hops to truly shine. Lastly, we’d like to thank God because he totally gives a shit about all this.
7.0% abv, 58 IBUs
Thoughtfully Considered.
Happy Belated
Lager Beer|5.5%|26 IBU
We think we’re all in agreement here - Festbier’s are fucking awesome. But why do they just have to be released in September? Yeah yeah we know - Oktoberfest. But let’s think outside the box - this style of beer is a perfect companion year round. It’s clean and crushable, slightly sweet with a hint of breadyness thanks to a blend of Pilsner & Vienna malt. But balance is key here - and that comes from three gentle kettle additions of soft and floral Hallertau Mittelfruh. And thus, we said “to HELL with the calendars and schedules!” and brewed this batch in mid-October. After a total of 8 weeks in the tank - it’s ready to party. Fashionably late, of course.
5.5% abv, 26 IBUs
No Scrubs
We don't want no.
DIPA|8%|63 IBU
During last hop harvest, we blatantly disregarded TLC’s advice and CHASED WATERFALLS - brewing a DIPA with Wet Simcoe and Wet Sabro from Perrault Farms. Well, we really liked that hop combo - ruby red grapefruit, young pine needles, key lime, & cedar - so we decided to brew something reminiscent...but added some Comet hops for an extra limey twist. So just trust us again, like you did with the waterfalls - you WANT scrubs. You may even love scrubs. Especially after it hangs out the passengers side of your best friends ride and hollas at you.
8.0% abv, 63 IBUs
We don't want no.
Forbidden Desires IPA
IPA|6.7%|65 IBU
…so Pale & Pilsner set upon a secret vacation getaway. At an undisclosed tun, they mashed in heated, fast, thick and frothy, the agitation activating little enzymes from within that neither knew existed. After some rest from the initial action, the careful extraction of wort and gentle sparge ensured that they were unified forever. But a boil was on the horizon. Intimate isomerization and raucous roiling ensued, culminating in multiple hot, HOT side additions of pungent, sticky, steamy hops. And not just any hops, but a trifecta of beauty and grace. There was the ever exotic, island dwelling Nelson Sauvin. A new starlet of small town origins named Strata. And then the A-lister Mosaic - a hop ever rising, yet far from climax. These hops would show up through-out the rendezvous, and not just on the hot side, imparting notes of passionfruit, gooseberry, pineapple, sex and candy. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. As the wort cooled, dollops of airy yeast awakened with intermittent breath, joining the affair. Rousing, rumbling in the depths of their fermentative rollick - it was 3 full weeks in heaven - everyday feeling a little more complete. But suddenly, the tank began to feel cold; ecstasy slowly replaced by a looming emptiness, leaving little time for goodbyes -- what felt like a premature evacuation. And maybe that’s for the best, a quick clean finish….
Left on Read
NW Red IPA
Dad Beer|6.8%|60 IBU
No no, this beer isn’t about how horribly aloof Seattle drivers are. But yes, they are the worst. This beer is about that one friend who refuses to change their text message notification settings so that YOU see that they have read your text message, usually quite instantly, yet take their sweet ass time to respond - leaving you hanging, as your mind wanders, and you start to wonder why haven’t they just responded to your simple question. Are they mad at me? Are they too busy? Am I that inconsequential to garner a timely response? I ALWAYS respond to them in a prompt fashion. Is this a one-sided relationship? Why am I always more considerate than they are? I guess the are pretty self- absorbed come to think of it. God they suck You know what? DEAD TO…..OH HI FRIEND!!!
2 Row, Crystal Medium, Carafa III + Simcoe, Chinook, & Centennial
6.8% abv, 60 IBUs
Flash in the Pan IPA
IPA|7%|65 IBU
IPAs Dude. They are like ever evolving, yet anchored to constant tenants. They ebb & flow, while continually crossing that familiar axis. It’s like - a guitar solo will get your attention, but would you even notice it without a backing baseline? Remember when Amarillo was the hottest hop in all the world? And Green Flash was king? And then Simcoe came out and people were like FUCK. Fast forward to now, but then take three years off - that’s where CRYO changed the game. Especially for a hop like Mosaic. And that’s still NOW. Even though T-45s were around from like the beginning. The concept was always there. The technology keeps it relevant. And the taste buds keep adapting. A brief flicker of fame, never to be repeated, until the record skips or our memory fades. Um, what else? Do you remember dinosaurs? Those things must’ve been CRAZY...
7.0% abv, 65 IBUs
Hi Bill Hiii
Bye Bill Byeeee.
English Dark Mild
Dad Beer|4.3%|22 IBU
Hey Bill! Hi! Look what we did over here! This beer! It’s like yours! But a tiny bit different! For real: ask any brewer in Seattle to name their top 5 favorite beers made in this city, and there’s a good bet that Machine House’s Dark Mild is on that list. For being a timeless, under-appreciated style in a sea of IPAs, that’s a pretty impressive feat. Inspired by Head Brewer Bill Arnott’s dedication to traditional, cask-conditioned English-style ales, we decided to give one a rip. The resulting beer exhibits semi-sweet chocolate aromas with a hint of roast espresso, followed by bread crust and earthy UK Fuggles hops all wrapped in a low abv package built to session. This is a beer for brewers.
4.3% abv, 22 IBUs
Bye Bill Byeeee.
Far Flung
Flinged Far.
International Style Pale Ale
Pale|6%|52 IBU
This pretty pale is all about that Motueka. Hailing from a remote part of New Zealand, people like to lump it in as yet another “tropical” hop...but we think that’s a bit of a stretch. This hop has a pretty expansive, wide range of flavors - key lime, meyer lemon, tree bark, & eucalyptus - that’s delicate yet assertive. It’s mother was Saaz, after all! We used three separate lots of Motueka throughout the process to create some depth & nuance upon a light & crisp crusher of a base beer. As the Kiwi’s say...more drinkie, less thinkie!
6.0% abv, 52 IBUs
Flinged Far.
Lose Yourself IPA
Lost Itself.
IPA|7.1%|55 IBU
During harvest, they say you only get one shot...or more, like 11...well, 14 if you count collabs…still, DO NOT miss your shot. Because opportunity knocks once in a….year. Opportunity is like 7 weeks a year. OK. Fuck it. ANYWAYS. Harvest is OVER. That means no more fresh wet hops to be released until next September. This is our first “normal” IPA brew after the harvest chaos, and we loaded it up with Simcoe, Amarillo, Mandarina & Centennial hops. It’s got that classic, predictably delicious pithy citrus & grapefruit character over a touch of malt along with a dry finish. Snap back to reality, oh there goes gravity. And trips to Yakima..
7.1% abv, 55 IBUs
In early August, our friends from Resident Culture brewing in Charlotte, NC came out to make a beer. Their lager game is super strong, so we combined forces to create a hop forward beer highlighting Experimental Hop 692. We laid out a simple base of Weyermann Pilsner malt, kept the kettle hops light and added a large whirlpool addition of Hop 692, in addition to Saphir. During conditioning, we lightly dry-hopped the beer with more 692, along with Citra & Saphir. The end result is a modern American lager that exhibits notes of passion fruit, pineapple, cedar & earth with a crisp, snappy finish. Because this is how we brew do it ….nowadays.
5.3% abv, 45 IBUs
Moxee Magic
Pulled off that disapperance act.
Wet Citra & Wet Chinook DIPA
DIPA|8.1%|60 IBU
This beer’s got Moxee! Because we sourced our hops from two of the longest running farms in town - our Citra came from Loftus Ranches, founded in 1932 and our Chinook came from Roy Farms, who started growing hops in 1907. That’s roughly 200 combined years of two families growing hops. And with a combined 21#/bbl this DIPA is loaded with notes of sweet citrus & resinous pine, with a surprising tropical & spicy finish.
8.1% abv, 60 IBUs
Pulled off that disapperance act.
Chasing Waterfalls
They said "Don't Go" but we went.
Wet Simcoe & Wet Sabro IPA
IPA|6.7%|58 IBU
Woah, woah, woah - cool your jets, TLC. Why would we stick the rivers and lakes that we’re used to? Don’t you know it’s HOP HARVEST SEASON We’ve got a natural obsession with ?!temptation - so you know what? Fuck it. We’re gonna That means - we chase ALL the waterfalls! Like this double waterfall at Perrault Farms in Toppenish that was sending Simcoe AND Sabro hops splashing all over the place. We’re gonna have it our way or nothing at all, because we have to move fast to make these beers.
~~~
66% Simcoe and 34% Sabro from Perrault Farms totaling at 21#/bbl.
6.7% abv, 58 IBUs
They said "Don't Go" but we went.
Green Means Go
Red Means All Gone.
Wet Centennial DIPA
DIPA|7.8%|55 IBU
On your marks. Get set. HARVEST! Late August is always the start, Centennial is always first picked, and CLS Farms is always the first stop. This year’s crop was outstanding - with notes of blackberry, lemon, pine, & melon - thanks to 24#/bbl. Well - what are you waiting for?! We said GO!
7.8% abv, 55 IBUs
Red Means All Gone.
Generic Space Reference IPA
Blast off!
IPA|6.9%|65 IBU
Greetings Earthlings. This IPA is out of this world. How do you know? Umm...because space shit is involved?!? Like exploding stars and astronauts and Galaxy hops and asteroids and Comet hops and planets and solar systems and Citra hops and rockets and astronauts and El Dorado hops and gravitational fields and satellites and and and LARGE MAGELLANIC CLOUDS! That’s why you will like this beer. It’s got haze, it’s got hops, it’s got a dry finish…but mostly because we put a lot of research and ingenuity into the CONCEPT and DESIGN of this beer. Prepare for blast off, this IPA is totally nebular!
6.9% abv, 65 IBUs
Blast off!
A$AP Hoppy
I love wet hoppin', that's BOTH our fuckin' problem.
IPA|7%|72 IBU
I love wet hoppin’ that’s my fuckin’ problem,
and yeah I like to hop it’s a fuckin’ problem.
If finding Centennial wet is your fuckin’ problem,
bring your van to the farm maybe we can solve it.
7.0% abv, 72 IBUs
I love wet hoppin', that's BOTH our fuckin' problem.
In A Barbe World
C'mon Barbe, let's go party.
Extra Pale Ale
Pale|5.9%|48 IBU
This little pale here is a dream house for Barbe….Rouge hops. WTF are Barbe Rouge hops? Well, they come from Alsace. That’s in France so obvs they’re fancy. And some people say they exhibit red berry and citrusy tones, but we think that’s a little embellished. We get a lot of classic noble spice - black tea, lemon zest, & dried orange pith - that’s pleasant and delicate and subtle in this dry, crispy pale. In our Barbe world, this beer is cherished and respected - not objectified, demeaned, or harassed. And it isn’t fighting an uphill battle for equality or reproductive rights. BECAUSE FUCK THAT SHIT. Ok, ok - let’s bring this description back to the start.
Come on Barbe, let’s go party?
5.9% abv, 48 IBUs
C'mon Barbe, let's go party.
Broad Spectrum IPA
Sunblocked.
IPA|6.9%|65 IBU
August hath arrived, yo. That means: lots of sunshine, outdoor activities, beach bummin’, and pleasant attitudes. And this IPA is like a miniature version of all that good stuff crammed into quenchable, liquid form. How’d we do it? We used a broad spectrum (obvs) of classic, popular, new & experimental hops that all exhibit enjoyable, concerted citrus elements - Centennial, Citra, Triumph, & Hop 522. With flavors ranging from tangelos to sweet mandarins to navel oranges to ruby red grapefruit, this IPA is cool for the summer, Demi Lovato style. Don’t tell you mother.
6.9% abv, 65 IBUs
Sunblocked.
Endless Summer Nights
I remember every moment.
English Summer Ale
Dad Beer|6.1%|27 IBU
Summer came and left without a warning, I’d give my life for one more pint. Every single sip you took was mine, we can have it all again. There’s only so much I can say, so please don’t run away from what we brewed together. I still recall hops along the beaches. And I remember how you loved me. Time was all we had until the day we said goodbye. I remember every every moment, of those endless summer nights. Wherever you go, whatever you do, I’ll be right here waiting for you. Hold on to the nights. Hold on to the memories.
Words inspired by Richard Marx, Maris Otter Malt, our house yeast, and a complicated yet traditional hop bill of East Kent Goldings, Fuggles, Chinook, Cascade, and Noble Citra.
6.1% abv, 27 IBUs
I remember every moment.
Don’t Be A Hero
Fell on it's sword.
DIPA|8.3%|65 IBU
Look. We could TRY to brew you a double IPA with unique flavors and idiosyncratic, exotic hops OR classic, traditional hops. And sometimes we DO! And most of you like it, and say stuff like “Mmm yes!” and “Wawaweewa!” BUT SOME of you are all like “That’s cool. I only drink Citra and Mosaic hops because that’s all I like.” Don’t you realize - WE ARE TRYING TO SAVE YOU! AND MAKE YOU APPRECIATE NUANCES! AND EXPOSE YOUR PALLET TO NEW FLAVORS DERIVED FROM THE FINEST HOPS IN THE WORLD! But fine, whatever, we get it. So here’s a DIPA with Mosaic and Citra and Simcoe and Galaxy and...Ekuanot Cryo (curveball!) that have all those familiar notes of dank pineapple and peaches and tangerines and grapefruit with our standard bitterness and dry finish. No, it’s not juice; and No, it’s not something from a pretty can; and No, it doesn’t have trade value. But you can drink an entire pint, FRESH, and enjoy it more as it opens up in your glass. You’re welcome...this time.
8.3% abv, 65 IBUs
Fell on it's sword.
Heaven Is A Place On Earth
Now do you know what it's worth?
IPA|6.8%|60 IBU
They say in heaven, hops come first. But in hop heaven...there are probably still hierarchical structures - and Citra, Nelson Sauvin, & Idaho 7 are most likely God’s faves. When we built this glorious hop bill with notes of fresh pineapple, passionfruit, & tangerines, we were afraid before. But after blending in some Weyermann Pils and a touch of Carahell with our usual Rahr 2-row, we are afraid no more. Pull this beer in close, take it in. Ooo baby, do you know what that’s worth?...Like, a lot. Hops are expensive. On Earth.
6.8% abv, 60 IBUs
Now do you know what it's worth?
Blanc and Tonic
Fancy Beer|5.9%|60 IBU
There was a time, not so long ago, when brewers would be inspired by flavors that existed outside of beer and would then try to create a beer around them, using traditional ingredients and novel, in-house techniques. Creativity was about process - not about sourcing extract & chemically enhanced flavors, using random brewing aids, and children’s cereal. And now, as you read this, some brewer in the universe has been reduced to making alcoholic water. FUCK THAT NOISE. We make beer here, and do it the hard way. And when we’re inspired by a unique flavor profile, such as a Lillet & Tonic Spritz garnished with a lime wedge, we’ll try to figure out how to make a beer that reflects that catalyst with traditional ingredients and an experimental approach. So, we started with a pale ale base that we hopped with Hallertau Blanc. Then, we added fresh lime and lemon zest to the whirlpool. And finally, we made our own tonic concentrate by steeping Cinchona Bark (a natural source of Quinine) and Lemongrass in hot water, deaerating it, and injecting into the finished beer once it was cooled down. Does it taste exactly like a Spritz or a G&T? Nope. Does it taste like a beer that is inspired by some of those components? Sure does.
5.9% abv, 60 IBUs
Mix & Match
Mixed & Matched.
American Pale Ale
Pale|6.1%|53 IBU
Sometimes we use pale ales as a vehicle to explore & express a singular hop - usually an experimental variety or a variety that’s new to us. That’s not what we did here. This time around, we wanted to blend a few varieties with the end goal being a layered, soft, fruity & floral concoction that continues to open up and present nuances with every sip. Thus, we built this beer around El Dorado hops - and then sprinkled in NZ Rakau, Loral, Nugget, & Citra hops throughout the process. The end result exhibits notes of white peach, lychee, aloe, and lilac - making this pale pleasant & intriguing & mixing & matching.
6.1% abv, 53 IBUs
Mixed & Matched.
In Those Jeans
It was tasty, really scrumptious
Throwback IPA
IPA|7%|65 IBU
This IPA is looking tasty, really scrumptious. Like the equivalent of a human rocking Dad/Mom Jeans, which are back in fashion by the way. This beer has all the sexy hops from that original era - Centennial, Cascade, Chinook, & Simcoe - and at rates that has a little pale crystal malt asking, “Is there any more room for me?” The end result of pine, resin, blackberry & grapefruit brings the thunder, and makes us wonder...about those jeans. And IPAs. Styles evolve, and some things come and go and come back again. Like a timeless classic - tasting good, pretty tight - this retro IPA is guaranteed to look good on you.
7.0% abv, 65 IBUs
It was tasty, really scrumptious
Art Deco Stuff
Mid Century Not Modern
Modern Double IPA
DIPA|8.3%|65 IBU
You might be aware, we don’t package our beer in cans (or bottles, for that matter).. But if we did, this DIPA would have a bunch of Art Deco stuff on the label. We’re talking lots of lines and patterns - like rectangles. And...and diamonds! It would make any geometry aficionado gosh darn proud. Maybe we’d even add some flared sconces, and it would definitely have a super cool font. But it’d still be simple, clean, & streamlined. Just like this hop bill of Azacca, Mosaic, and Citra. With elegant expressions of passionfruit, post-modern salmonberry and futuristic white grapefruit perched upon a contemporary malt bill of Pilsner & 2 Row that finishes with a crisp, avant garde dryness - you’ll be dreaming of René Lalique in no time.
8.3% abv, 65 IBUs
Mid Century Not Modern
Ctrl + A IPA
Ctrl + Alt + Delete
IPA|6.8%|59 IBU
Hey, here’s an idea! Our three largest hop contracts are with Yakima Chief Hops in the varieties of Citra, Mosaic, & Simcoe. For crop year 2018, the combination of that contract is comprised of 43% Citra from Shin & Sons Farms in Toppenish, WA; 31% Mosaic from Jackson Farms in Wilder, ID; and 26% Simcoe from Loftus Ranches in Moxee, WA. So, we decided to make an IPA with our selected lots in those exact percentages throughout the hot & cold side of production. The resulting notes of tangerine, candied pineapple, & rainier cherry will have you Ctrl + X and Ctrl + V until you Ctrl + Alt + Delete.
6.8% abv, 59 IBUs
Ctrl + Alt + Delete
Menehune
A hui hou
Fruited Tart Pale Ale
Pale|5%|32 IBU
This is one mischievous Hawaiian pale ale. It all started with Mosaic and Citra Cryo hops. The next thing you know, this mythological dwarf is adding orange peel in the whirlpool. AND THEN, when we weren’t even looking - boom Passionfruit and Pink Guava Purees found their way into the fermenter (to the ridiculous total of 23#/bbl). The end result is a hoppy, hazy POG beer that finishes dry with a pleasant, tropical tartness. Oh, you want juice? We’ll give you juice.
5.0% abv, 32 IBUs
A hui hou
Never Heard Of It
Hard of Hearing.
Pale|6.3%|50 IBU
Huh? Triumph hops you say? Is that a thing? IT IS NOW!
Developed by the USDA in association with the Hop Growers of America at Oregon State University, Triumph hops are the newest public variety to be released. So obviously, we HAD TO HAVE SOME. And so, we sold a kidney and the rights to our first novel and voila! A box showed up. Per usual, we feathered in some Citra hops as well because - it’s Citra and it’s delicious. The end result is a classic hop forward pale with notes of grapefruit, tangerine & resin, along with a crisp, dry finish.
6.3% abv, 50 IBUs
Hard of Hearing.
nelsonnugz.com
still live on the world wide web
Pale Ale Collaboration with Cellarmaker Brewing (SF)
Pale|5.9%|52 IBU
Through the collaborative spirit of the digital realm, we decided to upload our newest version of this hoppy crusher in the progressive tech hub of Seattle. Pale Ales are as tried and true as floppy disks, MS-DOS, VHS tapes and MP3 players. They never go out of style - even if they go out of relevancy. A blend of 2-Row and White Wheat prop up the hard drive, while the Nelson Sauvin, Nugget, & Hop 630 use up all the memory. Have a Beer. Surf the Web. Taste the Technology.
5.9% abv, 52 IBUs
still live on the world wide web
Bend to Squares IPA
Cut Lengthwise.
IPA|7%|58 IBU
We have gravitated towards a taste. Soft minerality, neutral malt, touch of body, dry finish. Citra hops dominate the landscape, and get pulled in the direction of peaches, tangerines, & fresh flowers thanks to a little Experimental Hop 630 and El Dorado. A perceptible bitterness builds, with weights down so that you can move forwards, sip after sip. Driving faster and faster through a narrow tunnel with no light in sight, is this a line of best fit or are we cutting ourselves lengthwise?
Editor’s Note: We are fully aware this description only makes sense to a tiny amount of our drinkers that were deeply into Death Cab For Cutie in the early ‘00s, and we’re ok with that.
7% abv, 58 IBUs
Cut Lengthwise.
Bad Timing
Well that was awkward.
Nitro Milk Stout with Coffee & Cinnamon
Dark Stuff|6.8%|43 IBU
Baby, this is what you came for. Lightning strikes every time she pours. WAIT what? It’s almost May and you DON’T want a full bodied, rich & creamy stout blended with homemade cold brew from Lighthouse Roasters and infused with Saigon AND Indonesian cinnamon from Market Spice? Even if it’s fucking delicious and poured with Nitrogen and not even that strong?! GODDAMMIT! Talk about Bad Timing….
6.8% abv, 43 IBUs
Well that was awkward.
Have We Met?
Now we have.
Experimental Pale Ale
Pale|5.8%|43 IBU
Hey Belma, you seem eerily familiar. It’s a bit spooky actually, masquerading in all your pithy grapefruit and pine notes. I know you insist we’ve never used you before, but then you go around twisting our plots, planting bitterness, scheming and sneaking in NW characteristics upon this bone dry extra pale base. Well guess what? We’re on to you like Shaggy & Scooby Doo crimesolver’s edition. And after our haphazard investigation, consider your mask ripped off to REVEAL….Belma is Cascade? Cascade is Belma?! ZOINKS!! You might still insist your difference, but we caught you….and you would’ve gotten away with it if it wasn’t for those pesky aromatics!
5.8% abv, 43 IBUs
Now we have.
Not Fast Enough
Maybe next time.
DIPA|8.5%|68 IBU
Sometimes you get there first. Sometimes you’re a day or a week too late. The name game, the hop game, the style game, the stout game. This name and description was ready to go - we swear! - til it wasn’t unique anymore. It happens. And so, we’ll just let the hops do the talking. We built the bill around Mosaic - bright pineapple with underlying dankness and depth. Then, we added Galaxy & Experimental Hop 630 - ripe mango, yellow peach, tangerine flesh - to pull it softer and blur the savory elements. It might’ve had a cuter name with a more methodically organized description - but this beer will still spark joy.
8.5% abv, 68 IBUs
Maybe next time.
A Million Universes IPA
Outta sight, outta mind.
IPA|6.9%|60 IBU
To bastardize a line from Walt Whitman’s Song of Myself - “And I say to any man or woman, Let your beer stand cool and composed before a million universes.” This beer is curious, mysterious, learning all the time. It opens up and evolves, comfortable with itself before it vanishes forever and others come to take its place. It exists, with a sole purpose of being an omnipresent vehicle, to deliver Galaxy, Strata, Citra, and Comet hops straight to your domepiece. If Walt was still around, we can easily here him say “Slurp these dank nugz of lupulawesomeness. For they, and you, will eventually fade.”
6.9% abv, 60 IBUs
Outta sight, outta mind.
Great Question IPA
Just Answered.
Hazy IPA Collab With Modern Times (SD & PDX) and Structures Brewing (Bellingham)
IPA|6.2%|43 IBU
This beer was brewed before a live audience. Before having a panel discussion about Hazy IPA that the Stranger hosted, we decided to make a beer! What kind of beer?!? A HAZY IPA. We used a blend of three base malts - 2 Row, Pilsner, & Golden Promise - and added Spelt and Flaked Rye. Then we added, Chinook & Idaho 7 to the Whirlpool and Dry-Hopped it with Citra plus some more Chinook & Idaho 7. What is Hazy IPA? Well, that’s a great question. Please enjoy this as an answer.
6.2% abv, 43 IBUs
Just Answered.
I Think We’re Done Here IPA
Ok, We're Definitely Done Now.
IPA|7%|55 IBU
Every local does it. By the end of February, we start yearning for sunshine, less wetness, warmer temperatures and longer days. We crave a vacation to a beach, dream of sipping tropical cocktails by a pool, and stare longingly at carefree, travel focused instagram feeds. It also translates over to our beer recipes, where all we want are tropical flavors wrapped up in a dry, refreshing finish. Thus, we used a bunch of Mosaic hops in this beer, along with some Huell Melon, Sabro, & Experimental Hop 692, to create a flavor paradise of ripe pineapple, guava, key lime & coconut flesh. Seattle, we love you but you’re bringing us down.
7.0% abv, 55 IBUs
Ok, We're Definitely Done Now.
Debate Because It’s Over
Well?
DIPA collab with Dry & Bitter and Crosby Hops
DIPA|8.1%|62 IBU
Light & soft malt bill of 2 Row, Pils, Wheat & Oats? Check.
Notes of Pineapple, Strawberries, Tangerine, & Lemon Peel? DELICIOUS.
Balanced Bitterness & Dry Finish? Yep.
Sounds good to us. Is it good for you? Debate because it's over.
8.1% abv, 62 IBUs
Well?
Burst Ultra Pure Platinum
Climbed. Conquered. Quenched.
Hoppy Session American Wheat
Pale|4.2%|38 IBU
Do you like to workout and do stuff? Indoors and outdoors, just exerting energy and crushing life? Cool. Us too. Since we’re super active, we thought… what if the new trend is just making some liquid and marketing it to the health conscious consumer that scrutinizes ingredients and carbs? Is this beer low calorie? Yeah, probably...we don’t fucking test this shit. But it has less MALT than our usual beers, yet the same amount of WATER - so you do the math. You wanna talk about flavors? Well, this beer has all of them. We used a natural process by adding YEAST to make this beer have alcohol. And also, we added HOPS to it. Like Citra, Cascade, & Mandarina. It doesn’t matter if you know what those are….we don’t know either. Anyways, they taste super citrusy and refreshing and good.
Race, golf, swim, fuck - quench your passion.
4.2% abv, 38 IBUs
Climbed. Conquered. Quenched.
Front & Center
Back & Wayside
Experimental Pale Ale
Pale|6.2%|52 IBU
Strata. So hot right now. STRATA. This former experimental hop X-331 out of the Oregon State Aroma Breeding Program is this year’s buzzy hot ticket. And it is warranted! We decided to cut it with 30% Citra and made an extra pale that’s super dry - so that there was nothing for it to hide behind. In the end, we get a fruit forward crusher with notes of tangerine, strawberry, raspberry, & bitter grapefruit. Mmm, it’s DELICIOUS.
6.2% abv, 52 IBUs
Back & Wayside
More Undone IPA
Definitely Naked Now.
IPA|6.8%|55 IBU
A couple of years ago, we got our first box of Cashmere hops in the house and brewed a pale ale in honor of Weezer’s Sweater Song. We’ve since really enjoyed playing around with these hops, both wet and pelletized. So, we scaled the original recipe up, added a touch of Citra for assistance, and voila! With notes of rainier cherry, passion fruit, lychee, white peach, tangerine, and menthol, this soft and fuzzy IPA goes down so smooth, you might unravel and soon be naked, lying on the floor, you’ve come undone….again, but more so.
6.8% abv, 55 IBUs
Definitely Naked Now.
Invent Transform Create Destroy IPA
We did.
IPA|7.3%|62 IBU
Brewing new IPA recipes every week or so for 3+ years is a constant pendulum for us - swinging back and forth between new ideas/ingredients/processes and known entities from past experiences. Every time, we must must INVENT! And then TRANSFORM our ideas and ingredients in order to CREATE something new and improved, familiar yet unique - for you and us to DESTROY. Like this citrus & resinous laden beer - hopped with Simcoe, Ekuanot Cryo, & Mandarina - and a splash of caramalt for color & balance. Focus on science, and let the IPA universe unfold. Thanks for the inspiration, Pickle Rick.
7.3% abv, 62 IBUs
We did.
Cult Favorite
Drank the Kool Aid.
DIPA|8.2%|65 IBU
By now, you’ve probably heard about it. Especially if you drink our beer. Sabro hops are fucking awesome. The unique flavors of key lime, meyer lemon, cedar, & coconut husk have garnered a devoted & enthusiastic fan base of brewers near and far. The early development of these hops were cloaked in mystery and their use began to spread via word of mouth during their experimental stages as Hop 438. Now with more acreage than ever, the next step is to pass our passion and enthusiasm onto a select audience of craft beer loyalists so that it’s following can grow. In this iteration, we added Citra and El Dorado to lay a base of tangerine and stone fruit for the Sabro to shine on. Join the cult.
8.2% abv, 65 IBUs
Drank the Kool Aid.
Eventually Anyway
Did it mean that little to you?
Oat Rye Stout
Dark Stuff|5.8%|40 IBU
Look: We all love little sips of massive, thick imperial stouts, often times barrel aged and/or laden with lactose, coffee, chocolate, vanilla, maple syrup, french toast, birthday cake, eggo waffles, snickers bars, and whatever other sweet snack is leftover in the brewery break room. It’s funny! It’s CrAzY!! Hahaha! Insulin shock! MY TEETH HURT. We know, we get it, we make a few ourselves...kinda. But sometimes, we just want a full pint or two of a simple, balanced, easy drinking roast forward stout. Those aromas & flavors of espresso beans, dark chocolate, burnt bread crust - they’re from the malt. The silky smooth body - we used flaked oats and rye, and a slightly warmer mash temp. That underlying earthy bitterness and fruity finish - that’s hops...also some yeast. That’s it. You might never wait in line for this...but you’re going to appreciate and enjoy this beer….eventually, anyway.
5.8% abv, 40 IBUs
Did it mean that little to you?
My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy
Ran Away
Dark Stuff|9.9%|55 IBU
Back by POPULAR VOTE! It started with a sexy/gorgeous Imperial Stout. And then we added all of the lights - aging it on Theo Cocoa Nibs, Hand-Toasted Coconut, Madagascar Vanilla Beans and Almond Oil - creating layers upon layers of complex and powerful flavors. Get lost in the world, before this monster forces you to runaway.
9.9% abv, 55 IBUs
Ran Away
Don’t Tell Rob IPA
Rob Found Out.
IPA|6.7%|50 IBU
The Stumbling Monk is twenty fucking years old. And it’s one hell of an institution, for brewers and drinkers alike. So we teamed up with our friends at Holy Mountain, Future Primitive, and Slow Boat Tavern to create a birthday beer for Rob. BUT, we kept Rob in the dark about it in the whole time. It was fairly easy to do since Rob doesn’t like this thing called the internet. We used Castle Pale & Pilsner Malt from Belgium as a base, and then integrated older NW hops - Chinook & Comet - with new wave NW hops - Idaho 7 & Mosaic - that results in notes of pine and citrus flesh and pineapple, with a touch of dankness.
Happy Birthday, Stumbling Monk!
6.7% abv, 50 IBUs
Rob Found Out.
Deep Red Bells
Rang like Thunder.
Northwest Red Ale
Dad Beer|6%|50 IBU
Just like Neko Case’s song, this beer pops on the surface level with beautiful notes of pine, grapefruit and red fruit thanks to a Northwest blend of Chinook, Centennial, Cascade & Simcoe hops. But underneath the hoppy pleasantries lies a deeper, darker malt bill that buries those earthy tones as notes of bread crust, burnt caramel and sappy resin rise from the ashes. Does your soul cast about like an old paper bag? Don’t answer that. We don’t want to know. Just let the red bells ring like thunder.
6.0% abv, 50 IBUs
Rang like Thunder.
Once Removed
Removed Again
Experimental Pale Ale
Pale|6%|50 IBU
Fairly known fact: Cascade hops were first released in the US in 1972. Lesser known fact: A couple decades later, rhizomes for this variety made their way across the Pacific to hop farms in New Zealand. The differences are striking, making this hop a super cool example of nature vs. nurture. With variations in climate, agronomics and terroir in New Zealand, the same hop genetics display a completely different flavor profile - with notes of key lime, red grapefruit, & beach grass. Thus, we made a pale loaded with NZ Cascade, and a touch of Citra, for you to taste for yourself. Pretty cool, huh?
6.0% abv, 50 IBUs
Removed Again
Ministry of Truth
Ignorance is Strength.
Dark Stuff|8.1%|45 IBU
Winston Smith will tell you that we always intended to brew a rich and decadent double stout that would be laid to rest upon whole, Willamette Valley blackberries. Is this a falsification of a historical event? You will never know, as this brewsheet was put down a memory hole. Is this description propaganda? Absolutely not. We manufacture the truth, approve our version of events, and will are always be eternally right and unwaveringly strong. War is Peace. Freedom is Slavery. Ignorance is Strength. Stout is Blackberry. Cloudburst is God.
8.1% abv, 45 IBUs
Ignorance is Strength.
Free Smoke
Drake’s caked.
Smoked Helles
Lager Beer|5.4%|28 IBU
Almost gave up the game, but we spoiled now. We had some different priorities; hazies had all the authority. We start our brew slow, smell of smoke when we mash tho. More lager, more everything. Weyermann smoked malt and pil; German Tettnanger to balance the bill. Let’s bring the game to it’s knees. And in your wake, bubble sweet fate. A plume of smoke, waft the flames, throw it back and soak your brains. Oh you brewer’s got jokes?!
Free Shmoke, free shmoke.
5.4% abv, 28 IBUs
Drake’s caked.
Freshious Medals
Tasted like winning.
IPA|6.6%|60 IBU
What happens when all three breweries that won medals in the 2018 World Beer Cup for Fresh Hop Beer combine forces? This beer happens! During the last week of harvest, we all headed to Yakima for one final wet hop brew of the season. What hops were available? Pahto was from Tributary Farms. So was Ekuanot and 472 at Carpenter Ranches. So we combined all 3 - some wet, some freshly kilned - and added them everywhere...even in the fermenter. The end result is a chewy, tropical bouquet of fruit punch, ruby red grapefruit, pine needles, & tobacco.
6.6% abv, 60 IBUs
Tasted like winning.
Been A Minute IPA
Minute is Up!
IPA|6.8%|64 IBU
Welp, hop harvest is officially over. I guess that means we have to start brewing boring regular IPAs again. It’s been 6 weeks since we brewed a normal IPA recipe, and we *almost* forgot how to hop them. But as we mashed in, we put on Celine Dion “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now” and we brewed it like this. And we hopped it like that. It was so long ago…..so we used Citra, Sabro, & Motueka in a 60/30/10 ratio, eliciting notes of ripe peaches, key limes, apricots, & cedar with a quenching, west coasty bitterness.
6.8% abv, 64 IBUs
Minute is Up!
None More Wet
How much more wet could it have been?
DIPA|8%|60 IBU
Look at this. This is it. It’s going out across the city. Simple, beautiful, classic. It’s like a wet mirror. You can see the Citra in both sides. I think it looks like wet. Wet sells. There’s something about this that’s so wet, it’s like how much more wet could this be? The answer is none. None more wet.This is the turning point. We’re on our way now. It’s 27 fucking pounds per barrel of Citra from Loftus Ranches. It’s time to kick ass.
8.0% abv, 60 IBUs
How much more wet could it have been?
Green Mile
Sometimes it seems so long.
IPA|7.5%|60 IBU
It’s a little bit longer than a mile between Carpenter Ranches and Cornerstone Farms, but we were happy to make the trek so that we could pick up Simcoe hops from two of Yakima Valley’s elder statesmen of hop farms. The drive between the two was every shade of green, and we allowed ourselves to zone out, roll the window down, and take it all in. The two terroirs resulted in noticeable differences - one with more pronounced pine, one with sweeter grapefruit notes - and when combined, create a depth of flavor that is a fantastic representation of all that Simcoe has to offer. The end result is a balanced, feel good beer with 16#/bbl of wetness that might leave a tear in your eye...due to allergies...or dust...whatever, we’re not crying, you’re crying.
7.5% abv, 60 IBUs
Sometimes it seems so long.
One in Eight
One too many
IPA|6.7%|50 IBU
YES! Our FIRST of most likely 8 wet hops beers this season! We used 21#/bbl of Day 1 harvested Centennial hops from CLS farms. The ritual of brewing wet hop beers is an inherently personal experience between brewer and farmer, and every year, the bonds between us grow stronger. Last harvest found Shelley Desmarias of CLS Farms in the middle of her second battle with breast cancer. We were moved to hear her story with the disease and inspired by her positive, “FUCK CANCER” attitude. This harvest, we came back to find Shelley healthy - kicking cancer’s ass a 2nd time! - while at the same time, Steve’s mom had just been diagnosed with the same disease. It turns out, 1 in 8 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer in their lifetime. So, we decided to make this first wet hop beer of the season count - Cloudburst will donate $1 of every pint sold in the tasting room will go to the Yakima Wellness House, a non-profit that provides health care services to women and families in the valley, and CLS Farms will also make a donation on every wholesale keg sold outside the tasting room.
Huge notes of strawberries, juicy fruit & pine combined with that familiar, underlying leafy chewyness!
6.7% abv, 50 IBUs
One too many
Bomb Dot Com
Boom Goes The Dynamite!
DIPA|8.6%|66 IBU
Yo! Check this beer out, ok? It’s got like LOADS of hops in it. Something like Sim Co, Citron, and one that’s a few numbers - who names a hop numbers?! That’s just crazy man. Anyways, this dope ass hop combination creates a nation of citrus fruits - like ripe tangerine, ruby red grapefruit, and navel oranges. There’s also a little bit of those peach gummy candies that you get at the movies or the airport when you’re in the mood for a fruity snack and not like chocolate covered pretzels or some other shit. Anyways, I digress. The flavors are cool and all, but what’s cooler than that is that this beer will get you LIT UP! All in all, it’s like almost as Boon…’s Farm.Two very enthusiastic thumbs up!
8.6% abv, 66 IBUs
Boom Goes The Dynamite!
Be Kind Rewind IPA
Rewound & Returned.
IPA|7.2%|45 IBU
Remember those simpler, more analogue times? Things took a little longer, we all had a little more patience, and people were more considerate of others. Like when you finished using a VHS tape, you’d rewind it so that the next person can enjoy it in the same manner you did….unless the tape jammed. Well, times have changed a little. And so have IPAs. Like this one. It’s hazy AF thanks to loads of pale wheat and oats, super soft & silky in part from additional brewing salts, with minimal bitterness because we only added hops to the Whirlpool and Fermenter. Who’d a thunk that up a few years back?! We used an equal parts blend of Citra, NZ Cascade, and NZ Motueka for huge, futuristic notes of tangerine, yellow peaches, key lime, & passionfruit. It’s a perfect example of the modernization of IPA, but brewed by two brewers with old-timey vibes, ardent work ethic, compassion for other humans and passion for all styles of beer.
7.2% abv, 45 IBUs
Rewound & Returned.
Out of Touch
We're out of time.
IPA|6.6%|52 IBU
Shake it up is all that we know, using the malts up as we go. We’re waking up to fantasy - Maris Otter & Crystal please. The hops all around aren’t the flavors we used to see. Cascade, Chinook still matters to me. Old beers that are broken can often be one again. Malty moves or hoppy dreams, or living in the middle of the two extremes.
~ ~ ~
You’re out of touch. We’re out of time. But we’re out of our head when you’re not around.
6.6% abv, 52 IBUs
Fine Print: this IPA is clear, subtle, and balanced with notes of lemon peel, chamomile tea, and pine needles. Don’t haze on us, bros...
We're out of time.
Like Sunshine
You were more beautiful than Cinderella. You smelled like pine needles and made our face like sunshine.
Fancy Beer|6.5%|40 IBU
This is a glass of alcohol that is more beautiful than Cinderella. It smells like pine needles and has a face like sunshine. Why? Because we aged our Happy Little Clouds in a Copperworks Gin Barrel until it was in that perfect wheelhouse exhibiting a pleasant spirit character and a touch of oak without overwhelming the delicate base beer. This is some classy sh...
6.5% abv, 40 IBUs
You were more beautiful than Cinderella. You smelled like pine needles and made our face like sunshine.
Math is Hard
zeroed out.
Pale|5.7%|35 IBU
Sometimes making some hazy-ish styles is like re-learning math via the common core method. It forces you to rethink the basic structure of knowledge. You’ve got to reorganize the brewing content in your brain, and adjust a course that’s been gathering inertia forever. You need to simplify complications and complicate simplifications, with a fresh set of eyes and an open mind. Wait, are we talking philosophy or math? Both, in and of themselves? What the fuck.
½ 2 Row + ⅛ Pilsner + ⅛ Pale Wheat + ¼ Flaked Oats = Malt
.36 Citra + .22 Mosaic + .18 Galaxy + .14 Idaho 7 + .10 Hop 438 = Hops
Calcium Chloride x Water
5.7% abv, 35 IBUs
zeroed out.
Impulse Buy IPA
Got it!
IPA|6.7%|60 IBU
What’s that you say? A miniscule amount of Nelson Sauvin hops has suddenly become available? Of course we’d love to buy it! Thank you for offering us a little piece of the most sought after hops on the market. Nope, we don’t care what they cost. Sure, you can have our kidneys, we only need one of them. Actually, do you have any more of those Nelson Sauvin hops available? We really hate to ask, we’re truly not that selfish - but we just had to see because you did have some available and we just wanted to double check. Are you SURE though? No, we’re not saying you’re lying we just were wondering if maybe somebody else could look and see if they were available. We’d REALLY like to buy more. GIVE US MORE PLEASE. LET US BUY FUCKING MORE NELSON SAUVIN HOPS WE FUCKING NEED THEM IN THIS BEER RIGHT NOW AND THE NEXT BEER AND THE BEER AFTER THAT.
Nelson Sauvin…..Citra & Vic Secret (because they wouldn’t let us buy anymore…)
6.7% abv, 60 IBUs
Got it!
Can’t Hardly Wait IPA
A-MAN-DUH-NE
IPA|7%|60 IBU
Peep this: The anticipation has been killing us. School’s out, graduation is over, and it’s time to for one last hurrah. Galaxy hops, which are like the Gwyneth of hops, are in the house, and they brought along they’re hot AF friends Idaho 7, Citra, and Mosaic to take the tropical-themed party to the next level. In this light, 2 Row and Pils malt somewhat resemble David Duchovny in X Files. Don’t get distracted and let the night devolve into a chance encounter with an Angel Stripper while listening to Barry Manilow’s Mandy. Or find yourself on top of a roof comparing the stars to salt on a pretzel that God wants to eat. This beer is destined for a better future, a happily ever after with Kurt Vonnegut and Jennifer Love Hewitt, and we want you live in the moment as you take it all in, one sip at a time, with Third Eye Blind playing in the background.
7.0% abv, 60 IBUs
A-MAN-DUH-NE
Easy, Breezy, Beautiful
Cover Blown.
Pale|5.3%|27 IBU
It’s fucking hot out! Which means we’re sweaty, exhausted and thirsty for something fresh. That’s why we brewed a smooth and refreshing American Wheat beer using 33% Weyermann Pale Wheat in the grist. But it’s not just any old wheat, you see. We hopped it with Citra and Galaxy hops so that the tropical, stone fruity notes could play off the creamy, tangy wheat character. And then our house yeast wrapped it all up in clean, dry package. Whether you’re on the go, or taking it slow - Easy, Breezy, Beautiful Cloudburst Ale.
5.3% abv, 27 IBUs
Cover Blown.
All Sales Final
No exchanges, returns, or refunds.
DIPA|8.6%|70 IBU
OH MY GOD do we have a can’t miss deal for YOU! For a limited time only, this Double IPA has got to go! It’s LOADED with 2-row and Simpson’s Golden Naked Oats - THE BEST TOASTED OATS IN THE WORLD. We’re losing our shirts and our minds with HOPS so HOT we can’t list them! Ok we will, but just for you. It’s mostly CITRA!! Also a touch of Cashmere and El Dorado. ACT FAST! Our loss in hop inventory is your gain! This BLOWOUT flavor of peaches, apricots and tangerines won’t last long so get it NOW! WE WILL NOT BE UNDERSOLD! We’re practically giving it away! No financing, all your money down. No exchanges, returns, or refunds. All Sales Final.
8.6% abv, 70 IBUs
No exchanges, returns, or refunds.
On a Tuesday IPA
Wednesday happened.
IPA|7.2%|61 IBU
Brew goin’ up, on a Tuesday.
‘Cause ya know that’s our motherfuckin’ double brew day.
We make it work, like woah - Mosaic, Idaho, mostly Sim-coe.
Tell Susie bring the juice, we about to get lit.
Pineapple, tangerine notes make it fit.
Fill the room up with some tings, one more brew and this is it.
Munich malt gives some sweet; pithy bite makes it neat.
Sip it up, after Tuesday.
Got your hops and some malt and they choosey.
7.2% abv, 61 IBUs
Wednesday happened.
Good For You
It was a lovely day for a Stout.
Dark Stuff|5.9%|35 IBU
It’s a lovely day for a Cloudburst. The sun is shining more, and the winter dark days are a distant memory. But sometimes, you still want a dark beer, because you like dark beers. And there aren’t many around. That’s when Cloudburst gives you strength. This beer is loaded with Roasted Barley and Flaked Rye, and when combined with some gypsum our and our house yeast - my goodness! A roasted, dark chocolate aroma gives way to dark fruits (think Marionberry) and dry, slightly acidic finish that surely will give you strength. Brilliant!
5.9% abv, 35 IBUs
It was a lovely day for a Stout.
Eeee! IPA
Aaaaaa!
IPA|7.3%|58 IBU
Look, “C” hops are great. We love them, you love them, everybody loves them. But “E” hops? Well, they’re kind of all over the board. Soooooo, we made an IPA with all the “E” hops we had in the cooler and voila: BEER! What “E” hops are we talking about? Pretty much most of them - Ekuanot, El Dorado, Enigma, Ella….and even a little EKG. Ew! Weird! But the End result is kinda Exhilarating...because it tastes Excellent! Notes of apricot, overripe peach, elderflower and lemon verbana accentuated by a subtle sweetness from of touch of light crystal malt.
7.3% abv, 58 IBUs
Aaaaaa!
Homemade Dynamite
Went boom too soon.
DIPA|8.8%|70 IBU
Did you know the critically acclaimed singer/songwriter Lorde is from New Zealand? Well, so are Nelson Sauvin and Motueka hops. So we gave you our best side, loaded up the malt bill with 2-Row and Pilsner malt, blew shit up with a maxed out hop bill that results in an explosion of passion fruit, white wine, bartlett pear, keffir lime, and lilac. Our rules, our dreams, we’re blind.
8.8% abv, 70 IBUs
Went boom too soon.
Gentle Coast
Cruised on by.
Pale|6.2%|29 IBU
This cloud of dust leaves a shadow of the mess we made while brewing it. 2-Row, Oats, and White Wheat leave a soft and mellow body for Citra, Mosaic, Simcoe and Hop 438 to runaway with the beer. Lots of stone fruit, pineapple, strawberry and ragged wood are harmonious in the breeze, and gentle on the pallet. You go, wherever you go today. Just after pleasantly sipping a few of these pretty Pale Ales first.
6.2% abv, 29 IBUs
Cruised on by.
Dear Diary
Yours Truly.
DIPA|8.4%|72 IBU
Dear Diary,
We brewed a double IPA today. I know, big whoop. But we designed the recipe around Centennial hops...and it’s 2018?!? Random! The kids don’t think these hops are cool anymore. Aaaand we probably shouldn’t have used them. BUT WE LIKE CENTENNIAL SO MUCH. ALMOST AS MUCH AS TOMMY LIKES SAMANTHA, WHO STILL WON’T EVEN SAY HI TO ME SO WHATEVER. Also, my dad likes Centennial hops and he’s a cool Dad when he’s not being annoying. Back to Centennial. I mean, there’s so much flavor of grapefruit, black currant, blood orange and juicy fruit in this beer - what’s not to like?! We even added a little bit of Simcoe and Citra for more citrusy fruit flavors. Kids LOVE Citra, so there’s that. Maybe they won’t even know. I can’t wait to see the look on their faces when they realize it’s Centennial they’re checking in. Fun times! K bye.
8.4% abv, 72 IBUs
Yours Truly.
Amusement Technology IPA
Searched and Destroyed.
IPA|6.4%|65 IBU
Look out money, cause we’re using technology. Well, new-to-us technology. Like touchscreens and in-line RTDs. So we made the world’s least forgotten beer (IPA), and we hopped it with soul saving Citra and Denali. If flavors of white peach, lychee, pineapple, and tangerine isn’t love in the middle of a firefight, than we don’t know what is. Ain’t got time to make no apology...for this beer, or this mondegreen of a name.
6.4% abv, 65 IBUs
Searched and Destroyed.
Buffering… IPA
Finally loaded.
IPA|6.4%|60 IBU
For the second IPA on our new system, we had a better idea of what the wort would be like - but we still found ourselves waiting on how different/effective the hop utilization would be. You can’t really get a solid grasp on hot side components of bitterness, flavor, aroma until the beer ferments out and the yeast drops, which takes about 12 days for us. As a result, we found ourselves patiently staring at the fermenter while the beer took it’s time FUCKING BUBBLING AWAY LIKE AN IDIOT WHY IS THIS TAKING SO LONG!?! UGHHHHHHH…... HURRY UP WE NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOU TASTE LIKE ALREADY!
⌛
Warrior, Citra, 2303, Mandarina, Amarillo
Notes of tangerine, ruby red grapefruit, & marmalade
6.4% abv, 60 IBUs
Finally loaded.
Future First IPA
We'll let you prosphesize
IPA|6.8%|60 IBU
We’re gonna see the future first. An IPA entirely full of experimental hops will have you mesmerized with how the strobes glow. Hops 682, 438, 522, 344, & 630 create a new wave profile of melon, lime, fruit punch, lychee and tangerine. A light malt profile with a touch of wheat and soft minerality fades in the background. This IPA is living so that the last night feels like a past life. Hold your breath. These hops’ll mean something to you.
6.8% abv, 60 IBUs
We'll let you prosphesize
Gobbledygook
Poppycock
Dad Beer|5.4%|50 IBU
We used a bluster of hops and a blather of malts to create this low gravity balderdash of NW Red ale. Chinook, Simcoe, Citra & Idaho 7 hops add all sorts of pine and citrus gusto, while an unintelligible hogwash of crystal malts and Carafa II contribute a bilge of color and poppycock. With a dry, crisp finish and low-ish abv, you can throw back a few without spouting random gibberish jargon like this beer description.
5.4% abv, 50 IBUs
Poppycock
Out of Pocket
Reimbursed.
DIPA|8.4%|68 IBU
This DIPA is a direct outlay of Simcoe, Mosaic, and Idaho 7 hops that may or may not reimburse your pallet. Notes of grapefruit pith, pineapple flesh, and wispy dankness may cover expenses accrued over a long period of time incurred on your behalf, but only after a formal review. If it’s determined that you’ve expended personal resources, unexpected or unfair, at the end of this enterprise, please direct hazy inquiries to our accounting department regrading what the fuck we’re talking about. Or not. In fact, don’t even think about deducting this.
8.4% abv, 68 IBUs
Reimbursed.
Imperial ≥ Metric
Is it, though?
Pale|6.6%|40 IBU
It’s an age old debate of spitting in the wind with this pale. We used equal amounts of two relatively similar hops from different sides of the globe - Yakima grown Cascade and Mandarina Bavaria from Germany - to see which would prevail. Both hops tend to be straight-forward & citrusy - Cascade a bit more pithy and abrasive, Mandarina a bit sweeter and earthy. One is stubborn and complicated, one is simple and linear. In the end, we think Cascade is greater than or equal to Mandarina, but let’s just table the argument for now and see how it lines up.
6.6% abv, 40 IBUs
Is it, though?
Fresh Frozen IPA
Usually fresh, rarely frozen
IPA|7.3%|60 IBU
We brew lots of wet hop beers every harvest. There’s no other beers we love to make more. But that time window is fleeting - roughly 6 weeks of harvest and then we’re all left wanting and waiting til next year. So we tried something out. We gassed, vacuum-sealed and froze 5# of Citra from Tributary Farms within minutes of getting the hops back from the farm. It was 3 hrs from picker to freezer. Could we seal in the wetness magic and save it for a later date? You can be the judge of that (but we think “Yes. Well, kinda. There’s a leafy chewyness there, and some added citrus and berry oils, but it’s not as bright and potent as the fresh wetness.”)
7.3% abv, 60 IBUs
Usually fresh, rarely frozen
Link in Bio
Error 404: Beer Not Found
DIPA|8.9%|68 IBU
DM for booking/inquiries.
MALT ∑ 2ROW + PILSNER + CARAFOAM
H✬O✰P✫S = 438 ⭑ Citra YAK ⇨ Moutre ⭑ Motueka NZ ⇨ Saaz CZ
SMELLZ✚TASTEZ
Key Lime Meyer Lemon Tangerine Cedar Yellow Peach Coconut Husk
. : ^ ~YOLO~ ^ : .
For more information, drink in Link in Bio!
8.9% 68 IBUS
Error 404: Beer Not Found
Bad With Directions IPA
Already Lost
IPA|7.2%|65 IBU
It starts at point A. Yep, that’s the starting point - a light grain bill of 2-row cut with some pilsner malt. Add water, a couple turns here and there, yada yada yada and you’ll reach a 5 way intersection of hops. Every choice looks familiar and well-traveled - Chinook, Centennial, Amarillo, Cascade, & Simcoe - but you can’t really go wrong with classic, seasoned options. At some point, pick up some yeast along the way at that place, and cruise on out with notes prickly pine needles, grapefruit rind, tangerines and a dry finish with a brisk snap.
7.2% abv, 65 IBUs
Already Lost
Barrel Aged Darkenfloxx
Nitro Bourbon Barrel Imperial Stout with Coffee and Hazelnut
Fancy Beer|13.8%|60 IBU
This delightfully dreadful Imperial Stout was inspired by a short story by George Saunders. Heaping amounts of Roasted Barley and Chocolate Malt lay a foundation for Lighthouse coffee and Hazelnut oil. It was then laid to rest in Heaven Hill Bourbon Barrels for 10 months and eventually blended and cold conditioned for another 90 days. The result is an evil concoction that is even more dangerously strong as it is pleasantly sippable...
“Drip on? For serious this time??”…”Acknowledge.”
13.8% abv, 60 IBUs
frictionless
eased out of it
Pale|5.7%|30 IBU
We streamlined this beer to create a seamless, user-friendly experience. There is no need for any human thought between sips, just check out and drink the beer. It’s as simple and easy as that. You’ll taste malt and hops, in the general sense - “Hi Malt. Hey Hops.” - but this beer is more about unconsciously experiencing something light, clean and crisp. All the while, and unbeknownst to you, we’ll be collecting data on the proprietary experimental hop blend we used in this beer called TRI2303. We’ll then share this data with YCH Hops, along with our personal tasting notes of an earthy, floral, citrus blend of flavor and aroma.
5.7% abv, 30 IBUs
eased out of it
Built to Sell IPA
Sold Out.
IPA|7.4%|65 IBU
Dear Cloudburst Drinker,
We’d like to inform you of an exciting new partnership that will take us into the next chapter of our beer-filled journey. This new relationship is a meeting of equals and mutually beneficial for each party, and we assure you that nothing will change. If anything, it will get better as it warms up! We will continue to focus on what we do best, all while improving your experience and increasing our access to information, capital, and networks. This is a sign of confidence, ensuring growth and survival during times of change and consolidation. We’re talking about the union of Citra & Mosaic in this IPA, brokered by Galaxy in a fantastic deal that we have executed, in conjunction with you, the drinker. We’re talking about the exchange of liquid. What the fuck did you think we were talking about?
With Love & Independence -- Cloudburst
7.4% abv, 65 IBUs
Sold Out.
Intentionally Blanc
Intentionally Gone
Pale|6%|40 IBU
I. Malt and Cereal Ingredients
a. Rahr 2-Row; Weyermann Pilsner;
[This Beer Brewed Intentionally with Hallertau Blanc]
II. Flavor and Aroma Profile
a. Flavor
i. Light Sweetness
ii. Subtle Minerality
iii. Asian Pear; Dragonfruit
b. Aroma
i. Passion Fruit; Concord Grape; Lychee; Tangelo; Sauvignon Blanc
III. Finishing Characteristics
a. Bright
i. Clean
1. Dry
a. See Appendix A
IV. Other Specific Details Regarding Contents of Beverage
a. Alcohol Content
i. 6.0% abv
b. International Bittering Units
i. 40
c. Price
i. $174 per ½ bbl
Appendix A
See Section III, subsection (a), paragraph (i), line 1.
Intentionally Gone
Business or Pleasure? IPA
True.
IPA|7.1%|40 IBU
Hello and thank you for drinking with Cloudburst Brewing. Before embarking on this journey with us, we have a few questions to ask: Have you recently come into close contact with livestock? How about cereal grains - like 2-row, White Wheat, & Oats? Ok, good, because this light and silky IPA is full of those and we wouldn’t want to cause an adverse reaction. Have you made any monetary investments that humulous lupulous have been integrated within? Specifically, high yielding floras such as Citra, Galaxy, Mosaic and/or Simcoe? Mhmm. Ok. And finally, is the purpose of this drinking for business or pleasure? It’s one or the other, they are not mutually exclusive. No, no they most definitely are not.
7.1% abv, 40 IBUs
True.
Both Right Now IPA
It was needed in our life.
IPA|7.2%|62 IBU
This beer is like a super catchy chorus that checks all the boxes, even if the words don’t make much sense. It’s got big notes of fruit with pineapple, lychee, white grapefruit, & honeydew but also has some danky undertones - like some of that fruit might be a day away from rotting. It’s got a veil of haze, but a quenching, piny bitterness. There’s a touch of light crystal in the malt bill to smooth out the aggressive hops, but it doesn’t get in the way. It’s Mosaic and Vic Secret. It’s both right now, and it will have you talking about your life.
7.2% abv, 62 IBUs
It was needed in our life.
Fanfare and Theme
Trumpets and glory fade into the ether.
DIPA|8.8%|70 IBU
You know that song that goes like, Bum bum babum brum - Tshhh - bum bum babum brum - BPRUUAAH BPRUUAA DADOO DUM DO DO DUMTILIDODODUMTODEDODODOOOOOOO? Yes you do. You’ve been hearing it for like 10 days straight on NBC.. It comes around every two years, alternating in the Winter and the Summer seasons. Anyways...that’s the name of that song. It’s also the name of this beer. Which is a competitive medley of Simcoe, Galaxy, & Mosaic hops, duking it out with the citrusy and tropical notes til the judge says “STOP.”
8.8% abv, 70 IBUs
Trumpets and glory fade into the ether.
Inquiring Grinds
Milk Stout with Coffee & Cardamom|6.6%|20 IBU
Turns out, Turkish Coffee is a really cool thing. Not only is it delicious, but there’s a tradition of reading one’s fortune in the leftover grounds in one’s cup. It’s called Tasseography. Look it up! Using that as inspiration, we made a hefty milk stout and infused it with homemade cold brew with Captain Bert’s beans from Lighthouse Roasters and hand crushed green cardamom pods. Whether the future ahead is positive or negative - DEAR GOD PLEASE BE POSITIVE - it’s best to enter it with an open heart and open mind…unless things are truly fucked. In that case, let your hypothalamus take charge as fight or flight might work better.
Efflorescent Adolescence IPA
Twas a taste of Spring.
IPA|6.9%|64 IBU
Close your eyes. Take a long, deep breath - in through your nose, out through your mouth. Envision standing in a bright green field surrounded by rolling hills dotted with wild flowers. The sun feels warm on your face and the air is filled with the scent of sweet perfume, salty beach grass, a medley of dew dropped herbs, and hints of fuzzy yellow peach skin. Existence is savory, soft and uniquely pleasant and you could just stay there for a while, but you can’t. Open your eyes, and gently ease your mind back to reality. Wasn’t that nice?
El Dorado, Citra, Polaris
6.9% abv, 64 IBUs
Twas a taste of Spring.
Definitely Your Father’s
Dad's drank it all.
Dad Beer|7.6%|55 IBU
It’s Winter time, and that means it’s peak Dad-Beer Season. You know, like - Celebration, Jubelale, Snowcap, Wassail, Cabin Fever, etc. etc. So we obliged by blending a handful of medium to dark-hued malts because Dads love reddish beers. And then we layered all that malt with Dad’s favorite hops - Chinook, Centennial, & Cascade - throughout the boil and fermenter for that nostalgic PNW hop profile of pine, resin, & grapefruit. And with a sneaky high-ish abv, it means Dad is going to get a little goofy...and then fall asleep snoring on the couch with the tv on. Just gIve the guy a break and let him sleep - he had to put up with your shit for decades.
7.6% abv, 55 IBUs
Dad's drank it all.
Comet Comet Comet Comet Comet Chameleon
You come and go.
DIPA|8.3%|73 IBU
Some say this is our dumbest name yet. And we don’t necessarily disagree. But look, with this Comet forward DIPA - every day is like survival. And paired with Citra - you’re my lover, not my rival. So, loving would be easy if your flavors were like my dreams. Haze Gold and Green. Haze Gold and Green. You come and go. You come and gooOOoo.
8.3%, 73 IBUs
You come and go.
No Recess IPA
Recess is OVER.
IPA|6.8%|65 IBU
Back by popular vote! Actually, er, this finished 2nd in the “Bring a Beer Back” balloting, but we decided to make it again for our 2nd Anniversary anyways. WWKB? This beer. Original Description: We’ve been working around the clock for what seems like forever to get Cloudburst off the ground. But our lack of recess is to your benefit – Chinook, Citra, Centennial & Amarillo hops highlight this bold IPA.
Recess is OVER.
Cease to Amaze
Ceased to Exist.
Fancy Beer|9.9%|55 IBU
Sometimes it just seems a little overdone, beer aged in bourbon barrels. Everybody with a brewery and a barrel is doing them. But there was a time when it wasn’t as ubiquitous - you needed money, you needed time, and space, and a connection. And those first ones you tried - Curioux, Abyss, Bourbon County (RIP) - remain vividly ingrained in your memory. Perhaps that’s why we keep making them - chasing that rush of your first, the best. Or not. Either way, we laid this beer down in 4 barrels from Heaven Hill distillery and kept them in our cooler for 13 months - tasting every other month or so, topping them off with fresh beer - until we decided it was time. A roasty, medium bodied base beer picked up notes of vanilla, dark cocoa, melted caramel and toasted coconut, and a kiss of brown sugar covered strawberries. All from the barrel, adjuncts need not apply.
9.9% abv, 55 IBUs
Ceased to Exist.
Come Original
Down.
Pale|5.3%|40 IBU
For our 311th brew, we decided to make a beer dedicated to everybody’s 27th favorite band from middle school (ok fine - not everybody’s). And yes, while some (most) musicians are more deserving of having a beer named after them, sometimes you just luck the fuck out. In this beautiful disaster of a rock/rap/reggae hop bill, fruity Citra is that familiar slap baseline in every fucking song, spicy Kohatu is that awkward rap in the breakdown and herbal Loral is that chill melody that comes out of nowhere to tie it all together. In the profound words of Nick Hexum - all entertainers come original, here’s why.
5.3% abv, 40 IBUs
Down.
Now Memories IPA
He liked it cold.
IPA|7.1%|58 IBU
We have all these old memories about this stranger thing Hop 438, only they’re not like, our memories. It’s like they were just placed in our brains - vivid notes of lime and cedar - by a shadow monster, and he’s upset that we haven’t brewed a regular IPA with them. So we obliged by creating a light malt bill, a blend of pale and pilsner, and added Citra hops to ensure effective integration into to new hosts far and wide. Once wholly consumed, it will only continue to exist in a parallel universe in the Upside Down.
7.1% abv, 58 IBUs
He liked it cold.
Market Fresh #14
Passionately Hibiscussed
Huh|6.8%|22 IBU
For the Fourteenth Market Fresh rendition, we amped up the white wheat and used some tropical Passion Fruit and combined it with Hibiscus. A nice blend of fruit and spice and everything nice.
Passionately Hibiscussed
Girl At Party IPA
Dumped by Boddhi
IPA|7%|60 IBU
What happens when your friends at Georgetown Brewing pawn off excess Equinox hops on you, even when you don’t want them? You make an IPA and name it after a deep cut, bit part character from the movie Point Break! Oh you don’t remember Girl At Party? Well, she was there with her arm around Bodhi for a hot minute. And If you want the Equinox, you gotta be willing to pay the Equinox price...which is Manny tackling us and our football into the Puget Sound when he finds out we made this beer.
7.0% abv, 60 IBU
Dumped by Boddhi
Fool’s Errand
Fool me once, wet on me.
Pale|6.1%|50 IBU
Aren’t wet hop beers old by now? Umm, NO...We brewed this beer with only 2 days left in September with Experimental Hop 472 from Perrault Farms. According to the man himself, this is the first wet hop ever made with Hop 472 - in part because it’s a weird fucking hop, with notes of oak, vanilla, coconut, & cantellope. But it’s been a long strange Wet Hop Fall, so we said “Let’s do this” while also adding some Citra hops to keep that weirdness in check. With 7 trips to the Yakima Valley this past season, 8 different beers brewed, hops from 8 different farms, and 87 tacos consumed - it’s safe to say this season was no fool’s errand.
6.1% abv, 50 IBUs
Fool me once, wet on me.
Honorable Mention IPA
Thank You for Your Participation.
IPA|6.8%|52 IBU
We didn’t enter an IPA in this year’s GABF, but if we did…it still probably wouldn’t have won any bling. BUT that’s not saying it wouldn’t be awarded a consolatory prize for participating. A bit brighter & assertive, Simcoe hops tend to dominate the IPA category year in and year out, and it’s distinct character holds up better with time. We also worked in Loral and Citra hops throughout the brew, accentuating both the piney/resiny and juicy/citrusy notes while minimizing the bitterness. This beer could’ve been somebody. Maybe next year.
6.8% abv, 52 IBUs
Thank You for Your Participation.
Eephus
Crushed it.
Pale|5.9%|45 IBU
This one very low speed junk beer that might catch you off guard. We’ve been throwing high heat all season with big, hoppy IPAs right in your wheelhouse. Now, it’s time for some change of pace. The delivery looks the same - big tropical notes from an effective arsenal of Mosaic, Galaxy & Mandarina hops - but that lower abv and clean malt bill make this beer scream a soft tossed, high arcing trajectory ready to crush. Some say “Eephus ain’t nothing and that’s a nothing beer” but those people will surely swing and miss.
5.9% abv, 45 IBUs
Crushed it.
Market Fresh #13
Guava Grooved.
Huh|6.5%|20 IBU
For the Thirteenth Market Fresh rendition, we amped up the white wheat and used some tropical Guava and combined it with european coriander and jasmine. A nice blend of fruit and spice and everything nice.
Guava Grooved.
Irreplaceable IPA
Replaced.
IPA|6.6%|63 IBU
To the left, to the left. All the hops we own in the cooler to the left. Citra, Vic Secret, & Enigma - pack all your things, we’re finished. Get in the kettle, there’s no need to mettle. We can make another brew in a minute. Matter fact we’ll have another brew in a minute. BABY. Don’t you ever for a second get to thinking you’re irreplaceable….because you are. We make new IPAs every other week. That makes them very replaceable, by definition. Thanks Beyonce.
6.6% abv, 63 IBUs
Replaced.
Farmers Only
You're gonna be lonely.
Pale|6.1%|45 IBU
Me: An unassuming pale ale on the outside, with a giant, juicy heart of Tributary Farms Wet Citra underneath. I’m soft yet dry and straight to the point. I’m consistent yet versatile, and get along with hops from all walks of life. I’m brewed hard to be drank easy. I have dreams of starting a farm, breeding and creating a new variety together.
You: Appreciate notes of ripe peach and tangerine. Passionate about seasonal ingredients, understanding about my long work days, and adventure seeking in the off-season. You clean up nice for the nobles, but get fruity/funky when it’s just you and me. Interested? Let’s take it slow, one sip at a time.
6.1% abv, 45 IBUs
You're gonna be lonely.
Heavy Wetal
Deaf and Whiplashed.
IPA|7.3%|50 IBU
We turned this beer up to “11” with Grains of Wrath Brewing out of Camas, WA and used 20 total pounds per barrel of Cascade from Cornerstone Ranches, El Dorado from Joe Champoux Farms and Simcoe from Carpenter Ranches to blow out your taste buds with a mosh pit of flavor. Death Growl your order because this beer is Metal AF.
7.3% abv, 50 IBUs
Deaf and Whiplashed.
Back and Forth. Forever.
Maybe not Forever. ))><((
IPA|6.6%|55 IBU
Our first wet hop brew of 2017 is for me and you and everyone we know. We used a healthy 17 pounds per barrel of Wet Centennial from CLS Farms, who has the largest acreage of Centennial in all of the valley, and then infused the wort at 4 different times with as many fresh hops as humanly possible. By the end of the growing season, it will seem like we’ve been back and forth to Yakima forever, but that’s life and it’s happening and it’s weird and it’s beautiful.
6.6% abv, 55 IBUs
Maybe not Forever. ))><((
Market Fresh #12
boys end berry
Huh|7.8%|15 IBU
For our twelfth rendition of the Market Fresh Series, we used 11#/bbl of boysenberry and a pound of Lemon Meadow tea from our friends a block away at Market Spice. The lemon and berry aromatics are followed by notes of dark fruit, a touch of acidity, and fluffy soft finish.
boys end berry
Cantwellian Dystopia
Pumpkin Beer is Dead.
Dark Stuff|8%|30 IBU
Pumpkin Beer on the shelves in July. Pumpkin Beer being brewed with no actual pumpkin. Pumpkin Beer that tastes more like a malternative than a beer. Pumpkin Beer segment sales in decline. Pumpkin Beer festivals down in attendance. Pumpkin Beer being poured down the drains. Pumpkin Beer a newly forgotten novelty of what was once synonymous with the beautiful transition of seasons. Pumpkin Beer is Dead. Long Live Pumpkin Beer.
Cinnamon, Nutmeg, Ginger, Clove & Allspice
8.0% abv, 30 IBUs
Pumpkin Beer is Dead.
Everything’s Pine IPA
Trust us. It's all pine.
IPA|7%|68 IBU
Everything’s fine? We’re seeing and feeling REAL climate change, Kim Jong Un has his fat little finger on the nuke trigger, and turns out our incompetent President is a fucking nazi sympathizer. No no, everything is NOT fine. We said everything’s PINE. Like in this beer. We built this IPA around your Dad’s favorite hop (Chinook) and feathered in some Cascade, Simcoe, & Idaho 7 to create a piney, resinous IPA that tastes like you fell asleep on the ground with your mouth open while hiking in the Cascades. Why would you do that? Because you’re tired and stressed out from all this needless bullshit in the real world and wanted to go for a hike, ok?
7.0% abv, 68 IBUs
Trust us. It's all pine.
Calypso Cooler
Sailed Away.
Pale|5.2%|50 IBU
You know when your Aunt drinks all the Boon’s Farms, and your Mom polishes off the last glass of Pinot Grigio, and you’re pissed off because you were going to combine the two and add a dash of bitters, and just sit back and enjoy the sunshine and Summer breeze and chill? No? You have no idea what the fuck we’re talking about? Well, this beer might explain some things. A dry, crisp Pale Ale with sweet cherry puree, peach puree, and pineapple juice combined with a boxload of Calypso hops makes one Hoppy. Breezy. Not that Beautiful. Calypso Cooler.
5.2% abv, 50 IBUs
Sailed Away.
Hoodwink Red IPA
It's a trick!
Dad Beer|7.6%|72 IBU
This beer was built to mislead your mouth. While it pours deep garnet in color, the hops still shine bright. Warrior, Chinook, Citra, Idaho 7, and Simcoe take your palate on a citrus voyage – from ruby red grapefruit to meyer lemon to tangelo. Embrace the deception, and get duped!
7.6% abv, 72 IBUs
It's a trick!
Dealbreaker or Not
Definitely Not.
Pale|5.2%|40 IBU
Question: If a pale ale doesn’t have any Citra, Mosaic, or Simcoe hops in it, is it still enjoyable? I mean, like sure, it’s probably going to be drinkable - but would you come back to it again and again? Because this pale has none of those. But, what it lacks in familiar and friendly Yakima varietals, it makes up for with international experience and exotic flavors thanks to ample Australian Vic Secret and German Hallertau Blanc hops. Notes of lychee, white peach, and kiwi. Dealbreaker or Not?
5.2% abv, 40 IBUs
Definitely Not.
Friendly Reminder
Thanks.
DIPA|8.4%|75 IBU
A few short years ago, the hottest DIPAs weren't Juice Bombs Dot Com. They had a little crystal malt, a whisper of haze (if any), and a sensory explosion of pine and resin and pithy citrus. Chinook hops were present. Simcoe and Centennial were the cool hops on the block. Citra was still Hop 366 and Hop 522 was but a twinkle in Jason Perrault’s eye. We gave this DIPA a modern twist, but let this serve as a friendly reminder that those beers are still delicious. Respect your Elder.
8.4% abv, 75 IBUs
Thanks.
Grande Mocha Nonfat Latte
"Order up for Summer!"
Dark Stuff|5.6%|25 IBU
We’ve been craving coffee lately. And also chocolate. Thus, a beer is born. We used a combination of 9 malts to build this beer, plus Flaked and Naked Oats, and some Lactose for a lil’ milky sweetness. Additions of Valrhona Cocoa Powder and house-made cold brew with 9 Swans Beans from Elm Roasters pull it all together. Limited time offer. Order at the counter and give us your name so we can misspell it.
5.6% abv, 25 IBUs
"Order up for Summer!"
Call Me Maybe
But we just met you! and it was crazy!
Pale|5.7%|24 IBU
Carly Rae has a new summertime hit on the radio. It's ok, but not as infectious as her first pop song - which has been stuck in our head since we named this beer. Seeking mass appeal with a dose of guilty pleasure, we brewed this beer with wildflower honey, Gambrinus honey malt, Thomas Fawcett Kilned Amber malt, and hand toasted Oats. It’s perfect for a hot night, wind was blowing, where you think you’re going baby?!
5.7% abv, 24 IBUs
But we just met you! and it was crazy!
Not My Favorite IPA
It was still really solid.
IPA|7.5%|60 IBU
Appearance is kinda hazy, but not opaque like orange juice. Smells like fruit but is also kinda dank. Bitterness is present but balanced. Finishes dry with a citrus snap. Kinda similar to most their of IPAs. Really solid, probably one of the best from them so far, just not my favorite. My favorite was…uh…that one from a while back…Would Recommend. 4 Stars.
Calypso, Mosaic, Hop 344, Mandarina
7.5% abv, 60 IBUs
It was still really solid.
Come Undone
unraveled, naked, lying on the floor...
Pale|6.4%|49 IBU
We haven’t played around with Cashmere hops before, so we paired them up with a little Citra. Turns out, they’re as soft and fuzzy as a fancy sweater. Notes of Rainer Cherry and White Peach are supported by herbal & grassy undertones. It goes down so smooth, you might unravel and soon be naked, lying on the floor, you’ve come undone.
6.4% abv, 49 IBUs
unraveled, naked, lying on the floor...
Keys. Phone. Wallet.
Lost and Forgotten.
DIPA|8.4%|65 IBU
First DIPA: Keys? Yep in my front right pocket. Phone? Left front pocket. Wallet - always back right pocket. Wow, this Citra and Ekuanot combo is complex!
Second DIPA: Keys, on the counter. Phone on the coffee table. Wallet on the desk. Mmm, this beer goes down super easy!
Third DIPA: Keys - fuck where are my keys? I put them on the counter and then James needed to get his shit out of my car - James, where the fuck are my keys!?! - And where’s my goddamn wallet? I literally just HAD my wallet. Also, call my phone?? Why am I always losing my phone? [Pounds beer].
Fourth DIPA: SOMEBODYshouldinventabeeperclickerthingthatbeepswhenyouPUSHitsoyoucanfindyourshit becausethisSUCKSIhatethisshitandsoannnoying [Leaves glass 2/3rds full on top of phone, next to keys, wallet in plain sight].
8.4% abv, 65 IBUs
